As I mope off, no witty insult at the ready, every good feeling I’ve been collecting for the past couple of weeks of cyber-flirting with Jude disintegrates.
But after I quietly deliver Gary’s coffee, I decide I’m not finished with Leslie. It’s not fair for her to torment me with these details. I don’t have to put up with what amounts to harassment. Feeling empowered, I go back to the break room, where I hear her and her new boyfriend murmuring and snickering, no doubt about me.
Just as I’m about to round the corner and confront her, I hear her say quietly, “I can’t believe it still bothers her after all this time. I mean, talk about lame!”
He says something I can’t make out and then she laughs. “Whatever. And, no, it’s not getting old. It’s amazing how entertaining it is. To think that I could get so much material from a couple of emails. What? Well, it serves her right for leaving her computer logged on overnight. That’s against the rules, you know. I was actually trying to help her when she called in sick that day. How is it my fault that when I went to turn off her computer, her email was up for anyone to read?”
This time I hear him say, “Yeah, but you had to open several files to find the emails you’ve been using to fuck with her.”
“Hey, she and Lover Boy shouldn’t have been using work email on work time to talk about their sex life. I’m just having a little fun with it.” I hear her heels clacking against the tile floor, getting closer to me.
Quickly, I duck into the ladies’ room, my heart flapping like a deranged bird. The first thing I think when I realize she’s not going to find out I was listening is, That bitch! The second is, Oh, shit! What else did Jude and I talk about in those emails? I’m suddenly thankful he never confided in me about his promotion. She would have spread it all over the office, and he would have been fired for leaking it. I might have been fired, too, for that matter. My third thought is, I can’t believe Leslie knows anything about my sex life! How mortifying! But the fourth, strongest thought is, I’m so sorry, Jude, followed closely by How do I make this right?
29
My first instinct—after I recover from the shock—is to go straight to Leslie and punch her in the face. Thanks to her snooping and her lies, I’ve been through one of the worst periods of my life, which is saying a lot, considering my life so far.
Fortunately for Leslie, though, Lisa walks into the bathroom before I can get up the nerve for physical violence.
“I have to get a passport!” I blurt to her, encouraged by her bright smile as she passes me on the way into one of the stalls.
She doesn’t even pause, but as she locks the stall door, she asks, “Why? Gonna go abroad and find someone to replace that man-whore Jude?”
I probably shock her by replying, “Hey! Don’t call him that,” but before she can ask what’s gotten into me, I say, “He never, ever, ever, ever, never touched her!” My elated statement echoes loudly off the glass tiles. Quickly, I explain to her what I overheard Leslie and IT-boy talking about, but when Zoe walks in halfway through the telling, I start over again. And I don’t even care. I could repeat this wonderful story a hundred times and never get sick of it.
Lisa says to Zoe as she washes her hands, “Did you notice that we were entering a parallel dimension when we stepped off the elevator this morning?”
Zoe smiles at both of us in the mirror and shakes her head. “No. But I think Libby just volunteered something personal, so we must have been.”
“What I don’t get,” Lisa says, “is why you didn’t tell Jude right away what Leslie was saying about him. I mean, you could have saved yourself a whole lotta heartache, sweetie.”
I’m too happy to dwell on that right now. I wave it away. “Yeah, well, I wasn’t about to discuss his and Leslie’s supposed sex life. Oh my gosh! I have so much to do, including getting a passport and eating a lot of crow.” I’ve never been so happy to swallow my pride, though. “And talking to Gary about taking some time off!”
Wincing, Lisa informs me, “Ahh, well, that’s probably not going to happen today… talking to Gary, that is. He just popped in for his meeting with Jude, but he’s out of the office at off-site meetings with clients the rest of the day.”
Not letting it discourage me, I say, “Oh, well. I guess I don’t have to talk to him right away. I have plenty of other things to do.”
Zoe clears her throat. “What if… I mean, don’t get mad when I say this, but what if…?”
Lisa finishes for her, “What if Jude’s moved on? It’s been a while.”
My heart sinks at the prospect, but I say bravely, “Well, that’s his loss. I have to stop waiting for other people to rescue me. I have to start being proactive and help myself.”
“Atta girl!” Zoe cheers.
On cue, Wanda pokes her head into the ladies room, but our boss doesn’t have to say anything to get us to scatter. Lisa and Zoe retreat to their own cubicles, where they start typing loudly and frantically to make themselves sound busy.
I really am busy. Just not with work. I spend the rest of the morning researching how to get a passport as quickly as possible. Then I look into how many vacation days I have left, how much money I have available to me right away, and how much a flight to London will set me back.
Right before noon, an IM almost makes me jump from my chair when it pops up on my screen.
TUESDAY, MARCH 30, 11:56 A.M.
Jude.Weatherington:
U there?
Libby.Foster:
Hi!
Jude.Weatherington:
It was good
