“What you have in there? LSD? That’s not going to chill them out, you know.”
“I think you’re going to like it.”
I rooted around in his pocket, and my heart dropped into my feet. I felt a small cold object and took it out of his pocket. It was heavy as I held it in my hand.
“Oh my god, Joe! It’s beautiful.” A large yellow diamond in a gold setting made a kaleidoscope of colors in the palm of my hand.
I looked up to see him on his knees. “Eleanora Lastra, I love you. Will you marry me?”
After I stopped bubbling like a kid who’d dropped ice cream on the pavement, I pulled myself together. “Yes, you dumb ass, I’ll marry you!”
“Gotcha, didn’t I?” he said as he picked me up off the ground and hugged me tightly.
“By the way, you never did tell me the sad story of a double D cup and the handsome prince that got away.”
“I take it you mean Anna.”
“I do, indeed. What’s her story? I’m sure, now that I’m going to be Mrs. Coli, I’m entitled to dig up a little dirt from your sordid past.”
“You reckon? What’s in it for me?”
“Tell me all the juicy details, and I’ll see what I can do.”
“You drive a hard bargain, Eleanora Lastra! Okay, I’ll tell you. On my twenty-first birthday, Marco thought he’d get me an extra special gift for my birthday.”
“Uh-oh, I can see where this is going.”
“Do you want to hear the story or not, Miss Smarty Pants? Anyway, as I was saying, he hired this rather attractive young lady to jump out of a cake at my party. Naturally, being Mario, he chose the one with the biggest knockers he’d ever seen. The night of the party, she leaped out of the cake, girls bouncing all over the show, and proceeded to convey her well wishes by giving me a lapdance. It took me weeks to get the frosting out of my clothes.”
“So, why is she acting like you two were engaged or something?”
“I don’t think the poor girl is all there. We ‘bumped into each other’ several times in the weeks after my birthday. I now suspect that she was stalking me. Whenever I turned my back, there she was. I felt bad after a while because she was being really sweet to me. She seemed harmless at the time, so I asked her if I could take her to dinner.”
“How sweet of you, Romeo.” I chuckled as he blushed.
“Anyway, we met for dinner at a new restaurant around the corner from Fabio’s place. She was delightful. We talked for hours, laughed, ate, and drank. I was the perfect gentleman; she was sweet but not my type, so I nipped it in the bud. The day after the dinner, she called me. We had a very pleasant conversation on the phone, and that was pretty much it. The next thing I knew she was introducing herself to my family and friends as my girlfriend.”
“You’re kidding.”
“I wish I was. She’d gone completely fruit fly on me. The chick is madder than a box of frogs. It took me months to shake her. It was a nightmare. She eventually got the hint, but not until after I had a restraining order delivered to her door. She was Mario’s cockup, so he got a friend of his from the police to write one out.”
“Did Mario ever get you a replacement gift?”
“No, now that you mention it. Remind me to ask him when I see him next if he has any other crazy cake jumpers for me.”
I jumped on his tummy and started pinching him, hard. “If I catch you, I’ll make Boobzilla look like a girl scout!” He grabbed my hands and kissed me passionately.
“You’re the only cake hopper for me, my gorgeous. You’ve spoiled me for all others.”
He started unbuttoning my shirt and slipped his hand into my bra. My body started tingling. As he kissed my neck, we heard footsteps coming from the path. We both scrambled to get untangled, just in time to see a security guard strolling past us.
“Nice day for it,” he said, giving Joe a knowing wink.
Joe and I got a sudden attack of giggles, packed up our picnic, and got the hell out of there.
Chapter Four
ELEANORA
“He did what?” Bria was jumping up and down, holding my left hand so tightly I thought she’d snap it off. “Holy shit! The diamond is huge. If I’d known he was loaded, I would have stolen him for myself.”
“Yeah, yeah. And break Fabio’s heart? He’s not exactly short on cash.”
“Congrats, Ella. This is so exciting. Do your parents know?”
“Are you nuts? My father is still trying to get over the shock of his daughter dating the son of a mobster. I think I’ll keep this on the QT for a while until they’ve recovered from the first shock.”
“Have you set a date? I bet it’s going to be a grand wedding. I better be your maid of honor, or I’ll have to kill you right here.”
“I’ll finish my degree in two years, and Joe is pretty busy learning the ropes at work. We’re not going to rush it. We’ll get married when the time is right.” I looked at the magnificent stone on my finger. It was as perfect as Joe was. I had no idea how I would keep this a secret from my mother. She could sniff a secret out of me faster than a pig could dig up a truffle. It wouldn’t be long before I’d slip up and let the cat out of the bag.
“Your mom will be thrilled for you, Ella. She’s an Italian mama. Have you ever met one who wasn’t elated at their
