I found it obscenely irritating that my mom thought she knew everything about Kelsey after meeting her for that short time. “She’s not like that.” Okay, she sort of was, but I wasn’t judging her for it, and as long as she never went behind my back while we were together officially, we’d be golden.
What happened before Halloween…no. That wasn’t how it was. Not anymore.
My mom lifted a single eyebrow, cocking her head like she was a know-it-all and felt pity for me. “You might be smitten now, but it won’t last.” She sounded so sure of herself, too. So confident Kelsey and I wouldn’t last.
I wanted to tell her off, to tell her she was wrong, but I was too upset at her to say much of anything. I silently stormed away, heading back in the living room, fuming as I sat on the couch.
My mom was a bitch. Did I mention that already?
Our Thanksgiving meal was had at our kitchen table, which sat in an alcove right off the kitchen. We hardly ever used the table; just for fancy meals like this. My mom sat at the head of the table, surveying her dishes with her nose upturned, as if she was disappointed in herself, as if she thought she could’ve done better.
Whatever. Food was food, and as long as food was stuffed in my mouth, I wouldn’t have to talk.
I was still pissed at what she said last night. I hated my mom for affecting me this much, but it was like I could do no right when it came to her. Staying in Sigma Chi even after what happened? Because of her, because she wanted me to. Going to SCC to save some money while taking the general classes? Her decision, because she was paying for it.
Honestly, I couldn’t wait for the day when I no longer lived in this house, when I didn’t depend on her money.
Kelsey was oddly quiet as the meal progressed, focusing on her plate the entire time. I said nothing, mostly because if I spoke, I was sure to lash out and say something I’d regret to my mom. Being on my best behavior was difficult for me, that’s for sure. I was at the point where I wanted to tell my mom to fuck off, that I was old enough to make my own decisions.
If she ever told me to choose between Kelsey or her money…I’d choose Kelsey, obviously. The money was nice, but it didn’t matter much. Kelsey was what I wanted; I’d choose her every single time.
“So, Kelsey,” my mom spoke after everyone had eaten most of what we’d put on our plates, “what are you going to school for?”
Kelsey’s dark eyes snapped up. “Uh, I’m not sure yet. I’m undecided.” She hadn’t eaten much, I noticed, just moved around the food on her plate. She’d started eating less and less after the night she found Mel.
I…I didn’t want to think about that. Mel was still in the hospital, still not waking up. The doctors said she was stabilized, but…
No. I would not think about that right now.
My mom tossed me a look, as if asking, See? I told you she wasn’t good enough for you. I hated that my mom thought she could judge Kelsey so much. Hated it with my full being. “You should decide soon,” she said. “The sooner you decide, the sooner you can start taking some classes that will actually further your education.”
“You’re right,” Kelsey said, far too meek. I didn’t like seeing her submit to my mother; I missed her fire, but I knew if she showed her fire to my mother, this whole house would blow up. Needless to say, that would be bad.
When my mom looked at me, I managed to smile. It was an obviously fake smile, not the kind of smile I gave Kelsey when she was being ridiculous, but my mom accepted it all the same.
Could this day just be over already?
Chapter Eighteen – Kelsey
No sneaking around for Levi and I while at his mom’s house. I…wasn’t feeling it. Not after overhearing some of the shit she’d told him—and listening to him just walk away instead of defending me to her. I mean, that was wrong, right? I wasn’t blowing shit out of proportion needlessly, was I? He should’ve said something, done something…
But he didn’t, and that made me wonder if Levi, deep down, agreed with his mother. If he thought we were just something to pass the time, that I wasn’t the kind of girl he could settle down with.
I…it made me upset.
As we got in the car the next day, I was quiet, even though I was leaping for joy we would no longer be subjected to his oh so wonderful mother. Yeah, that bitch was not someone I wanted as a mother-in-law, but…
Fuck. I shouldn’t be thinking that far ahead. If Levi thought this was just a college thing, then I really should stop myself from thinking about the future. It was quite possible we didn’t have one, which saddened me more than I ever wanted to admit.
I was quiet after telling Levi my parents’ address, still quiet even as we got on the road. He didn’t turn his music up, which let us linger in the silence perhaps a bit too much. I didn’t mind the quiet; our ride to his house had been mostly quiet, but this? This was different. I was trapped in my own head, wondering things I shouldn’t.
This was not a comfortable silence, it was the opposite, although I did wonder if Levi felt it, too.
Maybe I was just being an angsty teenager. Maybe this was me making up for
