“Part of an auction? Well, I am. And maybe you’re one of those assholes, too. I saw how uncomfortable you were when that client talked to me in the restaurant. Or how you asked me, out of nowhere last night, how much longer I’ll be doing this.”
“No,” he said, injecting energy into his voice. A part of him filled with shame, but he wouldn’t give up. He’d been wrong about her. Determination zinged through him, fast-tracking all his cells. Igniting him. Why deny it? He’d fallen hard for her and had shared with her more than he had with anyone else—he wanted her to be his. Only his. Forever. “I confess at first I wasn’t thrilled with the idea, but we can make it work. You taught me a lot and I’m not done learning. Just give us a chance.”
A tear fell from her eye, sliding down her cheek. She wiped it with the tip of her finger, then inhaled. “I can’t.”
The tips of his fingers tingled to touch her, and he almost did—stepping forward once again, too restless to stay still. She shook her head, the usual shimmer in her eyes gone. “I took a long time off from being who I was as a teenager, to figure things out. To see who I needed to be. Now that I know, I can’t do it halfway.”
What? She couldn’t leave him right now—not after all they’d been through. “You don’t fool me for one moment, Alexa. You’re scared and running away…from me. Are you afraid of loving me?” he asked, running his fingers through his hair, putting all his cards on the table.
“I’m not afraid. I just can’t. I’m sorry if I let you believe otherwise—I wanted to believe it, too. But it’s impossible.”
Against his common sense, he bridged the distance and took her in his arms. He kissed her, violently, pouring his soul into her mouth, holding her so close it became hard to breathe. She didn’t return his kiss, her lips cold and unmoving.
He let go of her, his heart more bruised than his ego. His body tightened, his shoulder blades cramped with tension. A low growl of disappointment escaped his lips. Could he have been wrong about her, like he had been about Pamela? Maybe she was right. She didn’t want his love—and that devastated him more than he could bear.
Chapter Sixteen
“Hey, Jackie. Is everything ready for tonight?” Alexa asked. The big day for Scott’s auction had arrived. She crossed her legs, going over the last details of the much coveted night. She’d chosen a new security firm and done the background check herself to make sure the team would be legit. Hell, she’d been doing more than needed lately—if it meant not thinking about saying goodbye to the only man she’d ever loved.
“Yep. Picked him up from the airport last night, and trust me, it was hard to be professional and let that man remain a virgin. He’s hot.” Jackie fanned herself. “Are all Texans like that?”
Alexa gave her a non-committal shrug. For the past week, she’d made an effort not to think about men in general, especially Texans. Brooks had tried to contact her, and she’d blocked his number. She’d been adamant for a reason—the family meltdown was only an example of what her life with him would be like.
She’d have to deal with silly jokes from his friends. He’d be shunned from his family life. How could she keep him from seeing his mother in whatever time she had left? His father had been direct—he’d squash any attempt for Brooks to see his mother if Alexa was by his side at social events.
Sadness wrapped her heart like a rubber band. She’d spent too many years of her life with shame—hiding from shame, then running from shame, and finally, capitalizing on shame. She couldn’t go back to worrying about what people thought. Not for her, but for him. Because she loved him. The thought flicked on a light inside her, offering temporary emotional respite, then it faded into the emptiness that had been her stalker and companion during the past week.
“Alexa.” Jackie nudged her elbow. “What’s wrong? I’ve been talking about security and you seem like you’re a world away.”
“Sorry.” Alexa shook her head. “You hired extra for tonight, right?”
“Yes. Like you asked.”
To ensure the women attending would feel safe, she’d planned not only for a new security firm, but also for more personnel, to keep any possible negative eventualities at bay. She wanted the women attending to enjoy themselves, not worry about getting into trouble of any kind. Thankfully, she’d emailed Brooks, asking him not to attend the event. Seeing him would crush her. He hadn’t replied, but also hadn’t shown up. So maybe deep down he agreed it’d be best for all if he didn’t go.
“There’s something I want to talk to you about,” Alexa began.
Jackie slid her finger across her iPad, checking an item off her list. “Shoot.”
“I’ll be retiring earlier than planned, but I came up with an idea that might be good for the both of us.” She walked up to the wet bar and grabbed the gin bottle, then poured two glasses. “You can keep running House of Alexa and I’ll get a lifetime fee for branding rights, but you’ll keep most of the money.”
With widened eyes, Jackie nearly jumped from her seat. “Are you serious? I know we talked about me taking over, but I never imagined you’d really leave.”
If House of Alexa meant something to someone other than Alexa, that person was Jackie. And now, peering at her, witnessing the pride and joy in Jackie’s eyes solidified her solution. “Yeah. You know, I was almost ready to close everything, but especially after visiting Kace’s brothel. If women want to sell their virginity, they should have a safe place to do it.”
“I agree.” Jackie hugged her, kissing her cheek. “Thank you. You won’t be sorry.”
Nostalgia welled up in her throat. She’d keep in
