“You want him?” he asked, his voice lacking any emotion, but I could see a shadow behind his eyes that made my heart skip a beat and disarmed me all at once.
I nodded, not wanting Kyan to hear my admission - while unable to deny it despite my rage - and Saint’s grip tightened. He reeled me closer, inhaling the air around me and seeming to suck every drop of oxygen out of it. “Just him?”
My lips parted at the question and I scrambled to hold onto my plan. I needed to work at dismantling their little empire. And getting close to Saint was key to that. Was jealousy my way in?
“No,” I said loud enough for Kyan to hear and he cocked his head toward us.
I wanted that to be a lie, but it wasn’t. I felt things for the Night Keepers, all of them. They each awoke a different part of me. And I secretly wanted to explore them all. Or maybe not so secretly now.
Saint’s adam’s apple bobbed and his grip continued to tighten, like he didn’t want to let me walk away from him.
“Make him pay,” he said at last, releasing me and I strode in the direction of Kyan’s room with a breath rushing from my lungs.
My fingers traced the skin where Saint had held me, his touch lingering beneath my flesh.
I finally released my anger and found a dark and determined place to settle into within me, burying any attachment I felt to Kyan deep down inside me where I’d never seek for it again.
I needed to focus on the positives. I may have sacrificed more of myself than I’d planned to last night, but I’d gotten my wish to punish them all the same. Another rule broken by Kyan, meant another slice of vengeance pie for me. And I was ravenous.
***
I messaged Mila in the early hours of the evening and she came to meet me at the kitchens out the back of the Redwood Dining Hall. I was so glad that I was able to spend time with her again and as she jogged up to me under the shade of a huge pine tree, I rushed forward and hugged her. I knew we were supposed to be keeping six feet apart, but the school was locked down and everyone who remained here had passed the forty eight hour quarantine period, so I didn’t think we had to worry.
“Girl, you’d better explain that cryptic message. I feel like you’re up to something bad.” She stepped away, giving me a narrowed eye look of mock judgement as she whipped out her phone, flashing me the message I’d sent and I laughed.
<3 Tatum <3:
Get your ass to the kitchens, I need your help with something fishy.
I laughed conspiratorially, grabbing her hand and tugging her through the back door into the storage room that connected to the kitchens. “We’re gonna make fish stew. And by stew, I mean we’re gonna throw every fishy thing possible together with mayonnaise until we can’t breathe because screw actually cooking stew.”
“Errr yuck. Why?” she asked, her petite nose wrinkling as she started helping me gather cans of tuna, mackerel and sardines from one of the back shelves. It was pretty bare in here since the Night Keepers had taken most of the good food. Apparently fish was not to Saint’s taste though. It wasn’t to mine when you threw it in my face either, King Asswipe.
“Because, I’m going to give a Night Keeper a bath,” I said brightly, my heart shining with anticipation. How had I gone from being the angriest person alive earlier today to floating on a cloud and sparkling like a damn rainbow?
Mila ran around to block my way back as I moved to head into the kitchen with the stack of cans clutched to my chest. Her eyes were frantic with fear and I felt her concern right down to the pit of my stomach.
“Are you crazy?” she hissed like she was worried someone was listening. “They’ll kill you.”
“They won’t. We have a new arrangement.” I side-stepped her. “And don’t worry, I won’t tell them you helped me, I promise. Even if I did, I’ve bought you Night Keeper immunity anyway.”
“What?”
She trailed after me into the kitchen and I placed the cans down on a metal work surface beside a large, industrial sized sink. Mila planted down the few she’d carried in, looking to me for further explanation.
I turned to her, placing my hands on her shoulders. “Relax, Mila. I wouldn’t ask you to help me if there was even the slightest chance you’d get in trouble for this. The guys let me make a few rules of my own. And I can punish them any way I like when they break them.”
“What rules?” she asked, her manicured brows pulling together. “And who broke one? What did they do to you?”
Her eyes gleamed and I dropped my arms to my sides, my heart squeezing at having a friend who cared for me like she did. I could see it blazing from the depths of her gaze. No girl had ever looked at me like that, not since…Jess.
Emotion burned the back of my throat and I glanced away at the piles of fish cans. I didn’t want to lie to her, even though I knew voicing the truth was probably going to cost me a healthy dose of my dignity. “The rules state that they can’t do anything sexual with me.”
“And they did?” she gasped, horror lacing her tone.
“Yeah but consensually obviously.” I smiled awkwardly, rolling a can across the counter as I avoided checking her expression for utter judgement.
“Which one?” she breathed, her voice softening enough that I guessed she wasn’t going to start shouting at me for being a top notch moron. Nope, that
