I gritted my teeth, turned the table on its side, and sat on a leg. With my weight pressing down on the wood, I increased the pressure until it started to protest. The wood snapped with a loud crack and I reached down to pick up the item.
Acquired Item!
Makeshift Club
Rarity: Common
Damage Type: Physical
Seals: None
“You’re the fucker that ate me scrumptious din-dins yesterdee!” a nasal voice screamed.
I spun around to see a gnomish creature of about waist-height. Saggy yellow flesh hung over his round head, and sunken eyes suggested he really had needed the hunk of meat I’d spat out. The gnome’s lips peeled back to reveal blackened teeth sharpened to fine points. Tattered garments clothed his skeletal body, but he wasn’t carrying any weapons. He raised a hand filled with razor claws and snarled at me.
For the first time since Lilith, I felt excitement surge through my newly-spawned elf form.
“It was almost as bad as your fucking singing, pus-bag.”
“I’m going to carve you into tiny pieces, Mr. Elf Thief!”
“You gonna shut up while you do it?” I challenged him.
Although the gnome looked frail and weak, my fight with the table two seconds prior wasn’t exactly encouraging. And, as usual, my need to be theatrical had kicked in, and I had pissed him right off.
The gnome barrelled in a straight line toward me, and I dodged, lunging to the side. A squalid stench wafted from the creature as he passed. He skittered, scrambled, and tried to readjust. He found his feet in the end, face twisted into a furious glower, the edges of his blackened lips spotted with sores. Spittle flew from his mouth as he screamed.
Great. More noise. Just what I needed.
The gnome accelerated this time, and before he came within striking distance, he leaped for me, razor claws sweeping through the air. I caught the claws on my club and drove my fist into his unprotected stomach. He tumbled to the ground as the breath exploded from his lungs.
An unholy screeching noise somehow made its way out of the creature’s mouth again as it hauled itself up off the uneven stone floor. I didn’t give it a chance to get its bearings; with two hands, I slammed my club down onto his skull, the end of the weapon exploding into a cloud of splinters. The blow left the gnome dazed, and I sprang forward to finish the job.
The now-fractured end of my club was sharp, and I drove it through the gnome’s throat. Blood gushed from the punctured skin and sprayed the room with crimson. The yellow creature crumpled to the chamber’s floor, and a blackish substance drifted from his corpse. I realized I was panting and dragging air into my lungs from so little action.
The mist lingered for a moment, before gathering and accelerating into my chest, and I peered down at my jewel. It felt like it had grown, however minimally, maybe only a fraction of a millimeter. Still, it was noticeable. A throbbing heat came from the place where my jewel rested against my chest, and then warmth flooded my mind.
Von Dominus killed Frail Sulfur Gnome!
Infernal Essence +40
I was glad to see Lilith was keeping up her promise to integrate me into the world with video game menus. I’d earned a bunch of Infernal Essence from killing the Frail Sulfur Gnome but concentrating my mind did nothing to show me what I could do with it. Maybe she was still working out the . . . kinks in the program.
I would just have to wait until I found a place worthy of my dungeon. This cavern wasn’t an ideal location, so I needed to move on. Another weapon would serve me well, so I hurriedly snapped another leg from the table.
Before leaving, my attention was drawn to the blood leaking from the gnome’s busted skull. I felt a strong urge to lap up the delicious-looking liquid but as much as I wanted to quench my thirst, I couldn’t stay. That crazy little bastard had made enough noise to wake up a cemetery, and my timer was still ticking down. Another battle might earn me more loot and Infernal Essence, but I couldn’t risk getting overwhelmed. If table legs and one fat little screeching gnome were giving me trouble, what could four of the bastards to do to me?
Armed with a fresh club, I took a minute to catch my breath before racing out of the chamber. My avatar was on a time limit, so I wanted to cover as much ground as possible. I reached the caverns’ exit in ten minutes without encountering any creatures. Brightness assaulted my eyes, and I filled my lungs with the stench of sulfur.
It smelled wonderful.
It smelled like home.
Yeah, this was hell alright.
I intended on making it my own.
Chapter Five
Fissures expanded from the mountain’s foot twenty miles in all directions like networks of blood veins. Smoke belched from the cracks in the earth while steam drifted from lava pools. Decrepit woodlands lay a few miles south, and a patchwork of fortified cities flanked skeletal trees, thin leafless branches jutting out like bleached bones. To the east was a massive crystalline sea, broken only by a smattering of mist-shrouded islands. Gray mountains with frosted peaks rose up from the west, and a desert of black sand spanned for miles in the north.
My elvish eyes could make out everything with the precision of binoculars. I felt a tug deep within my stomach that drew me to the edge of a cliff. I stood halfway up the mountain, its peak lost in the clouds above me and its foot a dizzying plunge below.
While I could have gone anywhere, Lilith had brought me to this mountain, and she’d
