WE WONDER HOW extravagance stops if men rush to vouchsafe extravagant tales. We have heard of Saint Germain’s father that he was a salamander and his mother a Muslim princess, and he thought it no great feat to draw spots from diamonds. Anon, we grow persuaded that he traded both eyes for hooks and beneath the roof of his friend, Prince of Hesse Cassel, this Quacksalver expired to the winding from a strange horn one overcast night at Sleswig—and doubt not that at the bar he lifted up both hands to plead innocent! Yet as the rabbit senses no limit to timidity nor the ferret to killing because one was born timid, the other murderous, so each has a claim and temperament but did not invent his traits. Nor can a man invent himself, thus it becomes comic to argue that he behave other than he did, being born of ramous and globulous parts—his head standing still while his brains pirouette.
O LISTEN LISTEN! Pouring juice of fennel together in a glass with a buck goat’s blood diluted by vinegar—should any man dare to anoint his face with this panpharmacon he will utter dreadful and audacious things. Or should the blood of Cyboi, which the Greeks call Iphim, be emptied into a lizard’s skin and a man drink it—Behold! Some will say he stands like a giant with his face lost among stars. And this possibility we admit, but we consider also how very often men’s eyes are shut tight like those of birds asleep from November to January.
AIBATHEST. ALBORACH. SERINECH. Zibach. What? What? Fugitive Serf. Glass of Pharaoh. Immaculate Lamb. What does it mean? Numus. Ethelia. Thabitris. Corsufle. Boritis. Mercy! Mercy! Artephius tells us that from the soul of the body Whiteness arises. Morien assures us that the second operation is but a repetition of the first. Matter being fixed in the bottom of the vase, says d’Espagnet, Jupiter puts Saturn to flight and takes possession of the kingdom to assume its government. Splendid! We smite our brow with admiration. Redness we find to be a continuation of the decoction of matter. Imbibition we learn is a time when condensing vapors descend upon sophic earth in the bottom of the vessel. Truly do we feel informed, as though we had spent the hour listening to hags, Egyptians and such-like, as each expounds what gives him satisfaction. Is there not more concord among snakes? Six metals at first we represent as bareheaded Slaves kneeling before the King, but after transmutation they wear a Crown! So do they propose to explain enigmas with enigmas. And were we handed a platter why should we not catch the Moon?
SPRING SEEMS A time inordinately pleasant to the bee, which likes to spend his hours collecting honey or wax. Pillage and rape are gratifying activities to the wolf, which lusts after the delicate flesh of ewes and lambs. Rivers appear wondrously agreeable to loitering fishes idly basking and swaying in the current of their element. But what seems pleasurable to Man? Furious, dissatisfied from birth he staggers out to gaze at he knows not what, then off he flies into all countries possessed of stories and tales spun by his cataract of thought. Praise God, we think men celebrate their passage in wise foolishness, dancing goats embossed on silver cups.
JOHN, ABBOT OF Westminster, much devoted to untrustworthy authors scattering falsehoods that lead toward whirlpools of misrepresentation, forfeited thirty years of his life in vain attempts to father the Regal Child. Cannot any man be subject to error? Aye, but fools persist. So we conclude this world was tossed on a blanket. So is the alchymist wise to sublimate desire like an elderly virgin in her quiet room pinning butterfly wings to a painted board.
NOW LET US render homage to Magister Bernard de Trévisane misapprehending gold for mercury coagulated by the resolve and inimitable strength of sulfur. Look upon his magistery! Haply assisted by that monk from Citeaux, yclept Geofroi de Lemorier, this ambitious pharmacist vowed he would separate the yolks from the whites of two thousand chicken eggs. Yea! What next? He would mortify in dung this auspicious yellow residue, from which he meant to distil or congeal a panacea. We think aspirants that choose a foot-path among labyrinths of apparent contradiction, cautiously eschewing predilection or lumpish misconjecture, will anoint themselves with glory. Not so our misguided innocent subordinating life and wealth and holy reputation to one egregious sophistry. O, how often do we hear men debate across the sun, comprehending too much or too little.
FRESH TALK OF a great English Philosopher or Mathematic—we know not which—that spends each afternoon inspecting bubbles puffed out of his clay pipe, and all bemused with attractive color believes chymists of Schemnitrium have conspired to liberate noble copper from gross iron! Woe is us! Might we contend that Egypt’s monarch Hermes compounded an universal solvent? Did he not? Incredulity being as hurtful as credulity, we would essay all matter while holding tight to what has been ordained, mistaking not ormolu for royal metal. That presumptuous shards of ice after centuries underground might accomplish their destiny by changing to rock crystal, as many believe, we ourselves would no more certify than dispute—elements being subject within themselves neither to change nor growth, unalterable and incontrovertible, one after the next. Yet the integrity of this universe has been dictated by homogeneous aspects. Therefore nature’s purpose must be to establish and fix the highest above the lowest, despite resident impurities, winding up Scripture in a nut-shell.
WE HAVE HEARD of some Italian who pontificates upon our world—that it is encompassed by
