“I don’t follow.” And she didn’t.
Sadness was mirrored in his eyes. He shook his head. “Never mind.”
A need to touch him had her running her foot up his leg. She yearned to pull him in tight and know they hadn’t lost their connection.
“So … we have an hour before we have to pick up Daisy. You wanna,” she lifted her chin toward the stairs and gave him what she thought was an alluring smile, “you know?”
What the hell am I doing? She was swinging from one extreme to another with dizzying speed. One minute she wanted to flee, and the next she wanted to fuck. Her mental hopscotching was running roughshod over her. She wanted him because he made her feel alive like no one else ever had. She didn’t want him because that same intimacy was crushing her.
In a very un-Gage-like move, he pulled his leg away, gathered up their dishes, and made for the sink. “Maybe later, beautiful.”
“So … no bath either?”
He began rinsing the dishes, a half-smile on his face. “A bath with you will take much longer than an hour.”
Right. At the sink, she nudged him with her hip. “You cooked. I’ll do the dishes.”
Without protest, he sat back at the counter, picked up his phone, and began scrolling.
“What time does your plane leave tomorrow?” she asked.
“Hmm?” He didn’t look up.
She turned and perched her hands on her hips. “Your road trip? When do you leave?”
Blue eyes rose to hers, then darted back to his phone. “Early afternoon. You’re still okay checking on Hobbes?”
“Yes. And you’re back a week from Wednesday?”
“Yep.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Wednesday’s when Derek’s band is performing.”
“You’ve decided to do it, I take it?”
“I told him I’m in. Will you come watch us?”
He raised his head and blinked. She was almost hoping for a little Derek-directed animosity, a glimpse of the caveman, but nothing like that showed in his expression. “Uh, yeah. Of course. Just send me the details. Shouldn’t be a problem to head your way after I land.”
Head back down, both thumbs now worked his phone.
Miffed, she couldn’t stop herself. “What’s so interesting?”
He turned off the screen and set the phone down. “Nothing.” Bringing his full six-foot-one frame upright, he stood and stretched. “I’m gonna skip Carla’s class and get in a workout today instead. With playoffs right around the corner, I need to concentrate on my training.” He trotted toward the stairs. “I’ll grab a quick shower, and then we’ll go.”
Wow! And, Lily, you’re not invited.
She nodded at his back, wondering what the hell kind of wall had just slammed between them. In the background, a familiar melody piqued her ears. “Have I Told You Lately?”—Jack’s and her song—played.
An arrow embedded itself in her heart, and she folded over, desperate for breath as tears rushed into her throat.
Chapter 30
Grabbing a Gear on the Stick Shift of Life
Gage let the water sluice over his body, hoping it would wash away the anger, confusion, and hurt pulsing inside him.
He’d believed there was more between Lily and him, but he’d made the same mistake the first time too. Never should have admitted how I feel. Instead of grabbing the damn stick shift of life, he’d stripped the gears and ground everything to a halt.
Apparently, he was the only one who’d fallen.
Add to it the Grims gorilla sitting on his chest, and Gage felt as though he’d been gut-checked.
He took his time in the shower, trimmed his beard, clipped his nails—to avoid facing Lily. Looking at her hurt too much, which was why he’d buried his nose in his phone, checking crap like weather and NHL standings. Also why he was skipping yoga.
What did Lily want from him?
Yeah, sex was off the charts, but was that it for her? He should be thankful. Go with the flow, right? The hottest sex of his life, and all he had to do was show up.
Wham, bam, thank you, ma’am.
Thing was, he could have that now, with lots of women. But he didn’t want lots of women. He wanted Lily. All of Lily. Her body, her mind, and most of all, her heart. He wanted her to feelfor him what she felt for Jack. Anything less was too hard. So was holding himself back.
He did want to claim her as his so the dickheads of the world knew they didn’t have a shot, damn it!
And there was Daisy. Somewhere along the way, he’d fallen for that little girl too. He wanted to be more than “Mr. Cage.” He wanted to protect her, step in if kids bullied her, threaten to mangle any boys who came sniffing around. He wanted to be that guy. And right now Derek had a solid grasp on that position. Fucking Derek.
These thoughts and what the fuck he was going to do about Grims went through the meat grinder in his mind on the ride to Ivy and Parker’s house. Lily busily worked over her thumbnail beside him in the passenger seat, giving it all her interest.
He wandered back to her nightmare and how her demeanor had flipped a switch afterward. What the hell had it been about? He’d probably never find out because she wouldn’t share that either.
Maybe this break was for the best, he told himself. Get some distance, take some time. Cool things off for a week. Solve his Grims conundrum. Get his head screwed on right and get his mojo back. Mentally prepare for playoffs.
The team needed him at a hundred percent now more than ever.
He had to make this all work.
Daisy kept him entertained on the way to Lily’s with a recap of her mites’ “season.” It had ended the Saturday before, and she was jabbering about ways to “up her game” next year and what did Mr. Cage think about this and that. He continually slid his gaze to the rearview just to watch her as she ran
