She felt way too mellow in the aftermath, though, to be too pissed off about him nearly crushing her.
He dropped a heavy hand to the top of her head, cupped it as if measuring it and finally scooped her up and draped her over his chest.
“Wha’ was that?”
“Make sure brains still dere.”
Emma snorted. “Oh you’re hilarious.”
“Serious,” he said, trying to sound like he was.
Inwardly, Emma shrugged. It probably had been a while for him, poor man. No telling how long he’d been on this mission. A knot formed in her throat on that thought.
Gaelen dropped a heavy arm across her back. “Nye alright.”
That comment jerked Emma from the edge of consciousness and she lifted her head to stare at him. “You’ve seen him?” she gasped hopefully.
He shook his head, looking as if he was already regretting the impulse to say anything. “No see. Hear here,” he said, touching his temple.
Emma lowered her head to his chest again, struggling with the urge to burst into tears for some minutes. Finally, she mastered it with the reflection that it was hardly a fitting reward for the poor man after all his efforts to please her for her to sob all over him. “You aren’t just saying that to make me feel better? It’s true?”
He cupped her face in both hands and made her lift her head to meet his gaze. “True. No lie to Emma. Neber.”
Emma felt her throat close. “You are themostwonderful man! Don’t freak out, but I think I could love you without a lot of encouragement.”
Chapter Eleven
Emma cringed inwardly as soon as the words were out, thinking how much better it would have been if she’d consideredbeforeshe’d said anything.
Gaelen tensed.
She wasn’t surprised—well maybe a little that he seemed to actually understand what she’d said when the impression she’d gotten was that he didn’t fully grasp the language.
Whichmighthave had something to do with the inspiration to say it.
Because he wouldn’t understand anyway.
“That was a joke,” she said quickly before he could say anything. “I mean … I wasn’t actually serious, just … uh … God! I don’t know. I’m socially awkward. It’s not unusual for me to stick my foot in my mouth.”
“Am confused. Why stick foot in mouth?”
“I’m not surprised,” Emma muttered wryly. “Let me try again—thank you for letting me know about Nye. I can’t begin to explain how much that meant to me. I had no way to find out anything and I’ve been worried sick.” And her gratitude had boiled over into stupidity.
“Ah,” Gaelen responded, nodding, clearly not really enlightened.
Or maybe not happy with that explanation?
Right! He wanted her to fall madly in love with him!
This wasn’tjustfucking! It was meaningful. And not just in the sense of using it to procreate.
Emma just wished she truly understood, but, as absolutely pathetic as it was, she realized there was more truth than humor in what she’d said.
Why else had it even occurred to her to say such a thing? Even with mockery and self-depreciation, why that and not something silly?
Of course itwassilly, but it also wasn’t something anybody should ever say flippantly.
Especially when they’d just had sex with a man they hadn’t known even a month—well, maybe that long.
She was deranged from her experiences?
Or maybe, she thought uncomfortably, her near death experiences had brought out something she’d been hiding from herself?
She wasn’t happy with her life, or even mostly content. She was desperate for someone to love who would love her back and she just didn’t have a clue of how to go about finding what she needed.
Then Nye had virtually landed in her lap and almost instantly won her heart, making it clear what she needed.
And then, in the blink of an eye, he was snatched away.
Mentally, she shook her head at herself. She was looking for something to soothe her sensibilities about the role she’d been forced in to—so she could pretend she wasn’t just fucking to breed for the slave masters.
It was as simple and as complicated as that.
So, yes, she supposed fear had scrambled her brains.
But it was also true that she’d developed a fondness for the men who’d taken her from her old life because she wanted to be with Nye, especially Gaelen. There was plenty there to make them loveable.
Struggling to dismiss it, she turned to Gaelen for distraction. He managed it with amazing ease, taking her to paradise again, dispelling all of her tension and sucking the energy from her so that she could fall into a black pit where life hadn’t been upended.
When she roused later to a level near consciousness, she realized that Gaelen was no longer beside her. Consternation flickered through her but she was too exhausted to simply bound up and wide awake, even if it meant a threat of some kind. Instead, she drifted closer to surfacing and then she realized that what had wakened her was the sound of splashing water.
It wasn’t the drip of a feeder line. This was … bigger.
Struggling, she managed to sit up and look around.
There was still no sign of Gaelen, but she heard the splash again and slipped off of the platform to investigate. She discovered a narrow opening at one end of the platform that was much like the one in the cell she’d occupied with Kadin.
The sound was coming from there.
She braked, unwilling to invade his privacy if he was making use of the facilities, but really it didn’t sound like that. It sounded like someone moving around in a … well something tank-like, like a bathtub. After a moment, she moved to the opening and took a quick peek.
There was a tank alright, an enormous one, but it looked nothing like a bathtub.
After a few moments, still hearing the slap of water against
