His deep brown eyes bore into mine, and they see everything.
“I mean, I’m not fine,” I add. “But I will be fine. I don’t think I’ll be riding any horses again, but I’m not afraid to be around them. I want to go to the show. I want to meet your stepfather.”
At that, darkness washes over him. “No, you don’t.”
“Why not?”
He stares at me and the silence and tension in the car hums. Then he says, “It doesn’t matter. He’ll be fine with you.”
“He’s not with you?”
He chews on his lower lip for a moment, and then looks down at our hands intertwined. “Let’s just say I can relate to everything you just said.”
“Marco speaks so highly of him.”
I said the wrong thing. Luciano lets go of my hand and straightens up. “Marco has no reason not to.”
He puts his hands on the steering wheel where they grip the leather tightly for a moment, then release. I stare down at my own hand, wishing he was still holding it. You never realize the moments in which you feel safe until they’re taken away.
“I want to go,” I tell him. “I really do.”
“Are you sure? I can just drop you off. It’s not a big deal.”
“You said you didn’t want to go alone.”
“I’m a big boy,” he says. “I can handle it. Believe me.”
I believe him, of course. But I know what that text said. And even if he’s playing it off, I don’t want to do that to him. Like I told him, being around horses doesn’t bother me, as long as I don’t have to get on one. Besides, it’s been a long time. Maybe I’ll feel differently.
“I bet you’re a big boy,” I say teasingly. “I’ve heard the rumors.”
A flush comes over his cheeks and he gives me a dry look, like really Ruby?
But hey, it’s taking his mind off of things. A little innuendo can go a long way.
“Come on,” I say, patting the dash. “Let’s go. I’ll start singing Adele again if you don’t.”
Finally, a genuine smile. The one that makes you feel like a winner.
“Okay,” he says.
We drive.
Six
Luciano
The drive to my stepfather’s stables is about an hour, including traffic, located in the rolling hills of the Malveira region. It’s a place that comes with a lot of complicated feelings, and every time I go, I never know which one is going to take precedent.
Right now, I have Ruby to distract me. So much so, that I’m not really thinking about my stepfather or being paraded in public like I’m also on show.
I’m thinking about what she said.
The truth that poured out of her like blood from a wound.
The look of fear in her eyes.
Not because of a horse.
Because of her father.
Because I know that look so well.
Since I first met Ruby, she’s always come across as a free spirit, a tough girl, someone strong without a care in the world, going where the wind takes her. I know that’s how my brother sees her. But beneath that façade, I recognized her soft soul. That there were deep wounded parts of her she’d do anything to keep buried.
She showed me some of those dark parts today. She let me in for reasons I don’t understand. The only thing I do understand is that she’s not at all like she wants the world to see.
And I’m the only person who sees it.
But I don’t think any less of her, I think more of her.
And I want to protect her.
I spent most of the drive wondering if it was the right thing, bringing her to the Ribeiro Stables, but thankfully she seems fine as we pull into the driveway and I find a parking spot.
Meanwhile, I have to think about myself.
No matter what my father says to me today, I have to remember who I am and what I’m worth and that he has no say in that.
I also have to remember that Ruby is Marco’s girlfriend.
Not my girlfriend, not even close.
I know my father will be watching closely.
We step out of the car.
It’s hotter here than in Lisbon, and my suit already feels stifling. I really don’t know how Marco wears one all the time.
“Wow this place is stunning,” she says as she looks around, mouth open.
It’s busy. There are horse trailers everywhere and people running around and a crowd gathered around one of the larger rings in the distance. Lusitano horses are being led to and fro by stable hands, as others are being ridden. There’s media here of course, because these events are a big deal in Portugal, and my father prides himself on breeding the best horses in the country.
I don’t spot my father, but a movement near the house catches my eye. It’s my mother, dressed in a long black and white dress, her greying hair piled high in a bun.
“Luciano,” she calls out to me, smiling broadly.
“Mama,” I say to her as she pulls me into a warm embrace, kissing both my cheeks.
“Como é que estás?” she asks me. Then she glances at Ruby in surprise. “Quem é?”
“This is Marco’s girlfriend, Ruby,” I tell her.
My mother frowns at Ruby and then looks to me in confusion. “Your brother never told me he had a girlfriend,” she says to me in Portuguese. “And why is she here with you?”
I don’t think Ruby would like to know the translation.
“Ruby started working for me,” I say in English. “She’s helping out while Marco is on his ever-extended vacation.”
“Oh, but you know Marco deserves it, he works so hard,” she says to me, still not speaking English.
“Prazer em conhecê-la,” Ruby says, surprising the both of us. Her pronunciation isn’t perfect, but still she has the cadence of Portuguese down, and it’s not an easy language to learn.
“Oh,” my mother says softly, looking impressed. “It’s nice to meet you too,” she answers in English.
“I hope it’s okay that I’m here,” Ruby says. She waves her hands at her clothes. “And
