“That was…” Lucy starts when her legs drop from around my waist and she dangles in the air until I let her down gently. “Do you think anyone saw us?” Whatever she was going to say about the sex is pushed aside as she glances around the dark patio as she tugs her dress back down over her ass.
“Don’t know. Don’t care,” I admit honestly while zipping up my pants. “Just in case, we should probably go back to our room.”
“Right. Yeah,” Lucy agrees.
I take her hand and start leading the way back inside. “Unless you’re hungry?” I ask, making sure she doesn’t want to go back to the dinner.
“Nope. I’m good.”
She’s quiet again on the way back to the room, making me worry that she regrets what we did. I know I should regret it, giving her the intimacy that will make her think we could have a future together when that’s so unlikely I won’t even let myself consider it for a moment. Now that we’ve crossed that line, there’s no choice but to live in the moment, in this weekend with Lucy before everything changes, before she learns the truth and hates that she slept with a murderer.
Even though I have no clue what Lucy is doing when she disappears into the bathroom, I make my intentions clear by getting undressed and climbing into bed naked, waiting for her under the covers.
When I hear the shower turn on after about ten minutes, I can’t help but think that she’s procrastinating. Still, she’ll have to come out of the bathroom eventually tonight. I’m wide awake, ready to wait as long as it takes as I lay in the silent room, trying to figure out what I’ll tell her tomorrow on the car ride home, how I’ll break the news to her that after all the heartbreak she’s been through, I’m not the man she thinks I am, just someone else who ended up hurting her.
The best thing to do is try to keep things light. Easy. I won’t tell her how much I care about her or make any promises I can’t keep.
Finally, after at least an hour passes, the door opens and Lucy peeks her head out. When her eyes land on mine, I get the feeling that she’s disappointed I’m still awake. Fuck. I thought the sex was great, that we had a crazy connection. What if it was all one-sided?
“Hey. I thought you were going to sleep in there tonight,” I tease her.
“Just freshening up,” she says as she walks out in her pink pajamas that I fucking love and goes around to her side of the bed. “I thought you would have been asleep by now since you didn’t seem to sleep much last night.”
So she noticed that? I’m surprised since I tried not to toss and turn too much, fearing I would wake her.
Lucy throws the covers back on her side, which means she gets a look at all of me. Her eyes widen as she stares at my half-mast cock before her gaze finds mine.
“If you’re having second thoughts, we don’t have to do anything,” I assure her. “I can put some clothes on.”
“What? No. Why would you think that I’m having second thoughts?” she asks, but still doesn’t get into bed with me.
“Maybe because of your disappearance and disappointment that I wasn’t asleep?”
“That’s not…I’m just not sure what to do now, after earlier,” she explains.
“How about you start by just talking to me?” I suggest. Rolling to my side, I prop my head up on my arm and pat the empty spot on the mattress beside me.
After a moment of hesitation, Lucy climbs up in bed and sits with her back against the pillow and headboard, her legs stretched out in front of her.
“So, what’s going on in your head? Why aren’t you your normal, talkative self?” I ask. “Do you regret what we did?”
“God no,” she thankfully answers vehemently. “I’m just sort of confused. I think you’ve been giving me mixed signals,” she says as she examines her nails.
“I have?” I reply even though I know it’s true and not fair.
“Yes. First there was earlier tonight, here in the room,” she explains with her cheeks turning red as we both remember when my face was recently buried between her legs while she was laid out on this bed. “Then outside on the patio. Both times were incredible, really. And I want to do it again. I just thought you were still angry at me for lying…”
“I was,” I agree. “But I’m over it now. On the anger scale of one to ten, I’m at a zero when it comes to you,” I tell her truthfully. It’s impossible to stay mad at her, no matter what she does. Finally getting my tongue and dick inside of her hot little pussy certainly helped take my anger down a few notches.
“Seriously?” she asks, lifting her eyes to mine in shock that I could calm down so quickly.
“Yeah,” I answer. Not wanting her to get her hopes up about a future with me, I add, “Just, um, remember what we talked about in my apartment. When I said this can’t be more than a friends with benefits situation, I meant it, okay?” It sucks to withhold the fact that I’m in love with her, that I care for her more than I did the woman I married, but it’s for the best.
“Okay,” Lucy replies. “I understand.”
“Good,” I reply before I reach over. Throwing my arm around her waist, I’m easily able to drag her over until her side is pressed against the front of my body. As I lean down to brush my lips over hers, my palm starts to slide up her top until I’m cupping one of her perky tits. Our tongues meet soft and unhurried several times before I
