“Malcolm, it’s not your job to protect me. Sometimes shit just happens.”
“Shit never just happens, and you know that; not like this. Nate called me yesterday and asked that I look into everything I could about a Gina Lee Xiou. Why? Who is she to you?”
Braylee attempted to sit up, but, this time, didn’t allow the pain to stop her. She stuttered, “Wha…what did you find out? Did she have anything to do with the explosion? Was it meant for me?” In a pained voice, she asked, “Did Nate die because of me?”
“All we know is that it was a bomb. We can’t tell if it originated from your truck or not…yet. We’re still reviewing surveillance and hacking into the local and federal agencies to view their forensics. So, I can’t say for sure. I promise you we’ll find out. No matter the reason, it’s not your fault what happened to Nate.”
“I don’t know….” Braylee briefly closed her eyes. “I’ve been working on a case. It has global financial ramifications that could reach into the billions of dollars if successful. It could shutter an entire industry. Gina Lee Xiou and her family have a vested interest in making sure it’s not successful.”
“Is that the Manchetti case?”
“Yes.”
“Are you in love with him?” Out of the blue, Malcolm asked as if he was inquiring about the weather.
His question threw Braylee off guard. She hadn’t anticipated it and definitely wasn’t prepared for it. Not from him. Initially, she looked down at her fingers unsure of how to respond then decided honesty with Malcolm was always best. He may have asked the question matter of factly, but she could see the intensity of the question in his eyes.
“Yes.”
Malcolm looked away for a moment. Braylee saw the clenching of his jaw before he expelled a breath and returned his gaze to her.
“You deserve to be happy. I’m glad you found someone.”
“Are you really, Malcolm?”
Braylee hadn’t noticed how close he’d moved to her bedside until he gently touched the side of her cheek. “Did I ever want anyone to replace me? No. Was it inevitable? Yes. When we met over ten years ago while you were defending Derrick from espionage charges, I thought he was crazy for hiring you…for a dollar no less.”
Braylee smiled at the memory. “Derrick Mathias. He had so much faith in me. You know him, and Lisa are part of the reason I finished law school. Even when I didn’t think I could do it, he encouraged me not to quit and rode me hard. I would have done anything for him.”
“I told him he was crazy to let someone with your experience, or lack thereof, represent him. He wouldn’t let me put my people on it. We had a mole on our team at the time, and he felt as if he couldn’t trust anyone. He trusted you with his life. He convinced me you were brilliant. Even I couldn’t help but be dazzled by your determination, creativity, and confidence in a courtroom.”
Reminiscing was bitter-sweet. “We spent a lot of time together back then. Even though I wasn’t an official part of your secret team, I should have gotten a bigger paycheck for all the work I did.” Braylee managed a smile. “But, eventually, you had no choice but to let me into your boy’s club even if it was unofficial.”
“I didn’t want you to be associated too closely with us for many reasons. Having a flashing target on your back for one. Mainly because I knew I would fall in love with you.” He smiled sadly. “Given that I’m old enough to be your father and that my life is crazy and dangerous…I just didn’t want that life for you. More importantly, I would have never been able to give you what you needed and wanted.”
Braylee’s throat felt thick. “How do you know that?”
“I knew, and you did too. Back then you wanted a life where we both came home at the same time of night, had 2.5 kids, and a dog. Hell, it’s never a guarantee that I’ll even come home. And, I’ve never wanted that life…I just wanted you. I loved you enough to let you go.”
Her voice was quiet. “I would have given all of that up for you back then.”
“I didn’t want you too. More importantly, life with me would be too dangerous. We’re not even together, and I’m wondering if you lying in this hospital bed has anything to do with me.” Slowly, Malcolm went on to say the things he’d always wanted to but never had the courage. “Braylee, I don’t want you ever to think what we shared didn’t mean anything to me because it did. It was special and pure. Unfortunately, we never would have worked long term. You needed a father figure back then, and I was it for the moment.”
“Maybe. Is your love with Tonya pure?”
It took him a moment to respond in a way that wasn’t hurtful but honest. “It’s different but no less pure. I love my wife.”
The thought of Tonya used to break Braylee’s heart because it always accompanied the memory of Malcolm’s voice telling her he was getting married. She always wondered why Tonya and not her until now. This time, though, when he mentioned her name it didn’t. There was nothing. Although she still loved Malcolm, it was now different. Only she hadn’t realized it until this moment. He was a great love but not the great love of her life. That spot was quickly being reserved for Alex.
“Tonya is my partner in every way, and you deserve a full life
