In between times, I paced, helping myself to something from the minibar on each circuit of the place. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt so damn claustrophobic.
I had dinner, put the tray out for collection, showered and dressed for bed. Still no sign. I put out every light but the tiny reading one over the bed. Although I tried to flip through a magazine, all too soon I felt my eyes slipping closed.
Some time later, I jolted awake. Had I just heard my name? I waited to see if someone was at the door, if they would knock again. When nothing came, I stumbled out of bed to check, but there was only an empty hallway.
I made my way back to bed, sighing into my pillow as I let sleep pull me back under.
By the time I reached the airport, I had a replacement phone, but there were no new messages from Toni when the SIM pinged back to life. It still bothered me that she might have come to the door and I missed her by being asleep. Then again, if she really wanted to talk to me there had been other opportunities.
I didn’t pick up a paper, and I ignored every other alert on my phone. It was only when we landed in LA that a headline caught my eye from the kiosk. Even my bad mood couldn’t erase the habit of picking out Toni’s name whenever it cropped up, and there it was, splashed all over the news about Xavi being busted for doping. My heart started to thump against my ribcage as I took in the whole impact of it. A scandal like that could burn down everything. Anyone tainted by it could be out of tennis for life.
Jogging over to the newsstand, I paid for a copy of the LA Times and flipped over to the sports section. A quick skim of the opening paragraphs confirmed that Toni had been kept for hours for extended testing. Which also explained why she wouldn’t have had access to her phone. While I’d been thinking the worst of her—that she would deliberately blow me off—she had been having a terrible experience that had most likely tarnished her whole victory. My mouth went dry as I read it all.
The glimmer of hope was that Toni had been cleared since she received a negative test result, but it said that further tests were still pending. It had completely reduced her win to a punchline in the overall scandal, and I wanted to hit something on her behalf.
They’d brought my car around for me, so as soon as I was clear of the maze of LAX, I called her on hands-free.
“Toni, I’m so sorry,” I blurted out as soon as she picked up. I got a stifled sob in response. “Listen, I know you’ve done nothing wrong. So do the media; they’re just burying that fact halfway down the page. Are you okay?”
“It’s ruined everything,” Toni said, her voice hoarse. “I was so happy, and I just went to pick up my bag before I came to your room. They were waiting for me like… I feel like a criminal.”
When I replied it was through clenched teeth. “Parisa will know what to do. Interviews or dignified silence, whatever she comes up with will be the right move.”
“I’m not talking to anyone. I wasn’t even going to answer your call.”
“You still coming to California?”
“My flight is in three hours. But Elin—”
“Come to mine first, okay? I’ll text you my address. We can travel down together Tuesday morning.”
“No, I’m toxic right now. I think Parisa’s advice would be…”
I gripped the steering wheel tighter, glad that traffic was moving pretty smoothly. My car was straining at the speed limit, and I had to resist the urge to just floor it.
“If she told you to stay away from me, I’ll fire her.” Parisa had been with me six years, had improved my life and my career at every turn, but I wouldn’t stand by and let Toni be thrown to the wolves. “Okay, maybe I’ll just sulk with her for a really long time, but if she said anything like that, it’s just reflex. She’s always trying to protect me. I don’t need to be protected from you.”
“That’s the first thing anyone’s said that makes me feel any better,” Toni admitted, snuffling a little. “Abuela tried, but she had to get home.”
“Well, in a few hours you’ll be here. I’ll have a car service at the airport for you, just look for the sign. Actually, I’ll have the sign say Larsson in case the press are lurking. Okay? Just look for it.”
“Thank you.”
“It’s no problem. Just come get some privacy and get back to enjoying your win. We’ll deal with the media and the ex-coaches and everything else tomorrow.”
Alice popped over not long after I returned home, to drop off a piece I’d admired at her gallery on my last visit. In return, she got to laugh herself silly at my attempts to tidy an already spotless house and staged an intervention when I got carried away setting up one of the guest rooms.
“For the love of… Elin, when she gets here, please don’t have the fact you set up a separate room be the first thing you mention. I am amazed sometimes that you’re not still a virgin.”
“Excuse me, Toni is having a professional crisis.”
“All the more reason to have some personal fun, wouldn’t you say?” Alice closed the guest room door behind us and ushered me back downstairs. “Especially on the same day as she has to deal with LAX. That saps the life from anyone who passes through it. Wait, how is she here already?”
I looked to the driveway and groaned. Car service, yes, but not bringing Toni to me.
“Mamma,” I told her, and Alice took up residence on the sofa. “She was supposed to be going straight to the club.”
“Then you’d
