I'd smile in amusement, but I don't want to give him the wrong idea—that his efforts had won him anything. So, instead, I press my lips in a thin line. "What made you change your mind?"
"Aria and the guys."
"So, what, they convinced you to think things through?"
"Something like that." He looks a little embarrassed. They must have laid into him.
I hope they pointed out how stupid his decision was. Then again, maybe they did. Maybe that's exactly the reason why he's standing in front of me.
He listened to them.
But he didn't listen to me.
"What do you want me to do now?" I ask in an icy voice. "Jump into your arms and welcome you back like nothing happened?"
"Peaches, no," he rasps, taking a step forward. "I never expected you to. I'm willing to wait. I intend to do everything to win you back." His eyes plead. "Just give me a chance."
Freaking unbelievable.
I shake my head incredulously, hot tears welling up in my eyes. "That's exactly what I told you, don't you remember? I said I'd wait. I promised I wouldn't get in the way. But you didn't listen. Now, you want me to do what I asked from you? That's rich."
He hangs his head, shame coating his body. "I'm a fucking idiot."
"No. You're hot and cold." I harshly wipe the corner of my eyes, angry that I'm crying in front of him again. Why does he keep breaking my heart? "One moment you're a nice guy, the next you're an asshole. You're giving me whiplash, Parker. Make up your damn mind."
He flinches but lifts his head, determination shining back in his eyes. My words didn't deter him one bit. They spurred him on.
"You want to hear the truth? I love you. Jesus, I'm so fucking in love with you I can't see straight." Parker exhales a shaky breath, as if it took everything in him to declare that. "That's why I thought letting you go was the right thing to do. My family needed me, and I didn't want to saddle you with my problems. A trail of baggage a mile long follows me everywhere, and I couldn't burden you with it. It wouldn't be fair." A wry smile curves his lips. "You deserve nothing but the world, and I thought I couldn't give it to you. Honestly, I still think that way. But turned out, I'm not as selfless as I initially believed. I just can't stay away."
I stare at him, my tears now streaming down my cheeks, refusing to be held back any longer. My free hand balls into a fist. Damn him. "You truly are an idiot," I choke out, wanting to kiss him and strangle him at the same time. "I told you I love you, you jerk. I didn't care how many problems you have. I wanted to be with you."
"I know," he nods. "I've always known that. And that's why I don't deserve you, but fuck if I'm letting you go a second time." He reaches out and strokes my cheek with the back of his hand. "I don't care how long it'll take to get your forgiveness. You're fucking worth it, Peaches."
CHAPTER 37
Sawyer
It's been over a week since Parker approached me in the parking lot and declared his feelings for me. True to his word, he's been working on proving himself. He walks me to my classes every single day. He patiently waits for me at my locker then takes my books from my hands. He doesn't even attempt to make conversation, like he knows that he won't get a decent response. That I'm not ready for that just yet.
So we walk in silence, ignoring the curious looks from everyone and the rumors going around the school saying we're already back together but keeping it lowkey.
He still gives me roses, but instead of getting other guys to do the work, he simply slips them into my locker every morning. Each rose is accompanied by a short message. It differs every time, and I find myself looking forward to it every morning.
But my favorite one happens to be yesterday's message. On the card attached to the pink rose are the words: "Your smile never ceases to light my world." I have to admit that it sounds cheesy, but if his intention was to see me smile, he succeeded.
And he's there without fail after every last period, walking me to my car as if to make sure that I get in safely.
That's not all though. Parker also makes it a point to text me "good morning" and "good night," as if to ensure that he's the first and last person I think about throughout the day.
Brayden thinks his methods are sweet. Quinn finds them amusing. While his friends, especially Bennett, keep asking me when I'm going to put him out of misery, saying that they're already running out of ideas on how to help his case. Quinn's theory was spot on. I just hope she's not right about the serenading part.
Liam says I should cut Parker a little slack. That he believes that his ex-best friend is a hundred percent committed to me this time. That he wouldn't have gone through all the trouble if he wasn't. Which, in turn, leads me to believe that Liam has truly changed. He no longer resents Parker. They'll never be friends again, but it's a step in the right direction at least.
On the other hand, Peyton, who's been quietly observing everything from the sidelines, tells me that I should keep making Parker work for it. That it's good to see him sweat for a change.
It's the nicest thing she ever said to me after what happened. Then again, it's not like she's still acting hostile toward me.
