“What the hell were you two bozos thinking?” shouted one of the guards Crush had smacked. She had a red spot the size of a ham on her face and it was swelling rapidly. “You’re headed to jail for this and for what?”
“Connie,” another guard said. “Why are you even asking them? They’re witches. Witches are dumb. Obviously.”
A third guard began reading us our rights. I was frankly surprised they thought we had rights and the list was suspiciously short.
They stuffed us into separate cars and drove us out of the Mudroom and into the city. I kept my face pressed to the glass and gawked like a tourist because hey, I was a tourist.
It was freaking awesome. The sky was blue instead of red. The plant life didn’t seem like it wanted to kill me, and there weren’t any strange beasts roaming the streets. Just people. Lots and lots of people.
When we finally stopped, it was in front of an ugly, squat building. The Keepers took us through those doors to a tiny waiting room, though we didn’t have long to wait before someone was buzzing us through to the back.
Rows of desks, rows of magi and witches alike, the magi in suits, the witches with restraints. No one really looked happy, but it was fascinating to me.
My Keeper tried shoving me into a chair but backed off when I just looked down at him in amusement.
“Sit,” the guy said, trying to inject at least a little authority into his voice.
I didn’t, wondering how far he’d go to get me in the chair.
His face began to redden. “Sit, witch. Now!”
“Nah.” Heads were turning our way, some of the magi looking startled as though seeing me for the first time. Over on the far end of the room, Crush was being equally, affably, stubborn.
His magi had already enlisted help, but no one was jumping up to save mine. I wondered why. Did they not like him? Was he one of those people that snitched on others as a matter of course? Come to think on it, he did look a little shady.
“Something wrong?” A magus walked over with his chest puffed out and his lips pursed. He had on a similar uniform to the Keeper in front of me, but there were more shiny bits and bobs pinned to his chest.
We wore precious stones sometimes to impress the ladies. From the looks of him, he was going to need a lot more shiny things if he was even going to win a glance from any self-respecting female.
“He, uh. He won’t sit,” my little Keeper said. “He’s kinda big, wouldn’t you say? Maybe we need … maybe we need some extra guards in here.”
“Jesso,” the puffer guy said, “he’s a witch. No matter how big they get, they’re still stupid. But they understand one thing, and do you know what that one thing is?”
The Keeper was turning an alarming shade of red as he tried to figure out what Puffer guy wanted him to say. Finally, he blurted, “Yes and no questions?”
Puffer guy whipped out his stunner and stuck it to my neck. The pain was eye-watering, but bearable, though I did sit if only to avoid more demonstrations of that type. Let him think he bested me. It would make him an easier target in the long run. And although I sat, he saw something that made him question whether he’d really gotten the better of me.
“You done?” I asked, my voice all warbly from the current passing through my throat. It was a strange sensation. Witch flesh must be, in addition to blubbery, water-filled. The pain zipped through my neck and into my eyeballs, as well as down to the tips of my fingers and toes.
He yanked the stunner away, looking sour and upset. His face wasn’t going red but an odd shade of tangerine. “There are other ways we can assure your cooperation. You don’t want to find out what those are.”
I kinda did, but I knew that wasn’t the correct response. “I do not.”
His pursed lips tightened into an O that looked like an anus and a particularly loathsome one at that. “Add a year to his sentence.”
“He hasn’t been charged yet,” the little Keeper said.
Puffer’s eyes snapped to the Keeper’s. “When. He. Does.”
“Y-yes, sir.” The Keeper sat and gathered up paperwork with shaking hands, not looking up until ole tangerine Puffer guy moved on. Then he licked his lips and began what he called the “In Processing.”
More like the “Boringing,” but hey, not everything in the Above could be exciting, could it?
Chapter Three
After a ritual that involved nudity, a search for unauthorized runes, spells, amulets, and so on, and a speech that was supposed to demoralize us, we were handed yellow and grey clothing and told to dress. We did, Crush and I standing away from the others since our size seemed to intimidate a few of the smaller witches.
“Line up!” one of the Keepers shouted and we did, Crush and I at the tail end. They marched us down a long set of stairs and sorted us through several sets of doors. Crush and I didn’t end up together which didn’t surprise me. They didn’t want us causing trouble, which meant separating us. Or thinking they had, anyway.
The prison proper was a long tunnel, cells on the bottom, a walkway with guards above. I supposed the magi thought they were safe up there looking down on everyone. It would be easy to climb on up there and take a couple of them out with the others none the wiser. Sure, there were bars and gates galore between us and freedom, but take enough of the magi hostage
