“Shit.” I pull my hand away and wipe it down my face. I catch her sad eyes and lean over kissing her temple as the other paramedic huffs. I twist my head toward him and glare, he jerks away, and I turn back to Via, my eyes softening. “I need to go talk to your mum. Do you want me to come to the hospital?”
“No. I’ll be fine.” She pushes the words out through gritted teeth, and I don’t know whether it’s because she’s in pain physically or emotionally.
“Isaac,” Shelly urges with a controlled frustration.
Ignoring her, I stare at Via. “I was gone, Via, and I know that I hurt you… but please believe me when I tell you that although I was gone, you never were. Not from me. Not for a second.” Her sharp inhale causes a penetrating, stabbing sensation in my chest as her eyes fill with tears. I don’t know why I had to tell her that, I just did.
Dragging my body away from hers, I push past the paramedic, Toby, and Shelly who have all filled the small space. Once I’m in the hallway I lean down and brace myself on my knees catching my breath. Glancing up, my eyes meet my dad’s and then Uncle Dane’s next to him. They wear a matching look of concern, and I can clearly see their brotherly resemblance. The other paramedic is now talking to Uncle Con and Aunt Pea. My dad edges toward me, but I stand and shake my head sharply before striding outside.
I need a moment, there’s an anger inside, and if I don’t pull it back into check, I might combust. Marching down the back alley through the darkness to where my car is parked, I stop and take in a lungful of the crisp night air. It pierces my chest like an alien invasion, and I cough trying to regain some composure.
“Isaac.” Shelly breaks the quiet moment. I squeeze my eyelids shut and pull my scattered thoughts together. “You’re too close,” she pauses seeming to weigh up her words. “We’ve worked together for years, Isaac, I’ve never seen you like this, so… messy.”
My head dips, and I lock our eyes. “Don’t.” The word burns through me.
Shelly sighs and lowers her head, but then her eyes meet mine once again, and there’s a fire in them, which means she’s going to say what she wants. I clamp my teeth together, grinding my molars, but I let her say her piece. She has saved my arse on numerous occasions, so it’s the least I owe her.
“You’ve never been anything but professional, Isaac.” Shelly slumps back against the car as I watch some of the fight drain out of her. “Cold. That’s how you’ve lived. I’ve only ever seen a softer side to you on very rare occasions. Then we come here... ” flinging her arm out, she gestures to the darkness, the nothingness that surrounds us, “… you’ve changed, Isaac.”
I look at her, some of my anger simmering down.
“I’ve seen you happy since you’ve been here, not glimpses… not just glimpses.” The words die on her tongue as she looks away again. Leaning forward, Shelly wraps her arms around her stomach and grips on tight. I watch the knuckles on her hands as they blanch under her clenched fists.
“I like you happy, Isaac.” I frown, not sure why her words surprise me. Twisting her neck, she stares up into my eyes. “But this isn’t who you need to be if you want to continue being one of us.” Shelly reminds me who I am and it feels like ice chips being shoved down my throat.
Pulling the car door open and gesturing to the other side, telling her non-verbally to get in, I throw her words back at her, sensing I’m not the only one conflicted. “Who are you trying to convince Shelly? Me… or you?”
Pursing her lips and narrowing her eyes, she glares at me, but then, without even blinking, she disappears into the car leaving my question hanging in the air.
“How is she?”
“She’ll be fine, her hand is stitched up, they only want to keep her in overnight because of her mild concussion,” my dad answers down the phone.
“Good.”
“Isaac—”
“Don’t.”
“Isaac, you will hear me,” my dad orders. I don’t reply, I just wait on the phone trying desperately to bite my tongue. “You need to speak to Toby.”
“No,” I spit.
“Yes. He’s really upset with himself.”
“He fucking should be.”
“Isaac, he’s your brother, he loves you.”
I stop cleaning the pieces of my gun and shake my head. “Fine. Where is he?”
“He’s still at the hospital.”
“He’s there?” I slam my fist down.
“He’s family, Isaac. You know full well that no matter what happened, Liv will want to see him. Anyway, I hate to remind you of this, but he’s been her constant for the last five years… him.”
Fuck me, it hurts so damn much to know that my brother took care of my girl… my cousin, dammit. I shake my head trying to ward off the unwanted thoughts.
“I know, Dad, I’ll talk to him, okay?”
My dad’s audible relief unlocks something inside, and I feel like shit for making him worry.
“Gotta go.” I rush out, cutting off the call when I see Shelly hastening her step toward me.
“What is it?” I demand, completely alert and primed, ready for action.
“There’s been movement at Crackers. Darwin called, they’ve spotted Milton’s men entering and leaving over the last six hours.”
“Fuck, why didn’t someone tell me?”
“They have, just now. We were busy, and nothing happened so they kept watch.”
“What’s changed?” I put my gun back together and gather my favourite knives.
“The assignment has been spotted. They took him in a few minutes ago.”
“Fuck.” I close my eyes and slow my
