Shelly watched disapprovingly as Chuck and Chili organized their stash. Chuck was a round-faced nineteen-year-old with a full black beard and a headband holding down his bushy hair. He wore well-faded jeans and tinted aviator glasses. With his sixties look, Chuck might have stepped right out of a time warp. His girlfriend, Chili, was a darkly attractive, slim eighteen-year-old with curly black hair and a facial expression that made her look as if she was always pouting. Chili was actually her real name. She had a twin sister named Pepper. The girls were born in a commune in Santa Fe and their parents were a little loaded at the time.
“Is that all you’re going to do this weekend?” said Shelly disapprovingly, watching them sort their plastic sandwich bags filled with grass. “Smoke dope?”
“Why not?” said Chuch wryly. “There’s no law against it.”
He seemed to find his comment extremely funny. But then, dopers were liable to laugh at anything, thought Shelly. He shook his head.
“There’s better things to do with your life,” he said.
“Like what?” said Chuck.
“I can’t think of anything,” said Chili.
Shelly decided to forget about it. It wasn’t his business to tell other people how to live their lives, but he wished that people that insisted on their right to ruin their health would respect other people’s right as well. He wasn’t crazy about having to sit there and breathe in their smoke. It was as bad as actually smoking.
“Hey, Chrissie,” Andy said, “how much farther to the lake?”
“We could’ve been there already if some people didn’t have to go to the bathroom every five minutes,” Chris said wearily, glancing pointedly at Debbie.
“That’s what happens when you’re pregnant,” Debbie said defensively. She had only known about it for a month or so and she hadn’t started to show yet. She also hadn’t told her parents. They didn’t even know that she and Andy were sleeping with each other, much less planning to get married. They figured she was still going out on casual dates.
Chili offered a joint to Vera, who was sitting between Chuck and Shelly in the rear of the van. “Sure, why not?” said Vera, taking it.
Shelly couldn’t take his eyes off her. Those shorts were so tight, they looked as if she had been poured into them and she was sitting with her legs spread . . . and her blouse was unbuttoned enough that if she leaned back, he could see . . .
When Vera turned and caught him staring down her blouse, Shelly quickly looked away. Now she probably really thinks I’m a jerk, he thought, angry with himself. He could never seem to do anything right. Hell, he thought, can you blame a guy for staring when a girl’s dressed like that? How can you not stare at anybody who’s so incredibly gorgeous? And she was supposed to be his date, too! A blind date, but still, he’d never had a date with anyone who looked like her. And he probably never would again, he thought miserably.
“Hey, let’s share the wealth with those less fortunate up front, huh?” said Andy.
Vera passed the joint and sat back down beside Shelly. Her gaze fell on the small black case where he kept his props and makeup. She looked up at him with curiosity. “What’ve you got in there?” she said.
“My whole world,” he said mysteriously.
“In that little thing?” said Vera, amused.
“Stick around,” said Shelly. “You’ll see.”
Vera shrugged and turned to look out the back window. She saw flashing red lights in the distance. They were coming up fast, and a second later she heard the sirens.
“It’s the cops!” she said.
“What?” said Debbie.
Chris glanced into her sideview mirror. “Oh,no!” she cried.
“Oh, my God!” said Chili.
“What’re you gonna do?” moaned Shelly, anxiously looking out the back window as the two police cars came up fast.
“Destroy the evidence!” said Vera, grabbing for the plastic bags.
Chuck snatched her. “No way, man!”
“Let go, Chuck,” Chili said. “Come on!”
It took a moment for it to sink in. Then he suddenly realized what would happen if they were pulled over with all that dope in their possession.
“We gotta get rid of it!” he cried, panicking as the sirens rapidly approached.
Andy grabbed a bag. “Eat it!” he said, stuffing some into his mouth.
They started stuffing the loose joints and the grass into their mouths, swallowing as quickly as they could. When Chuck realized that they were never going to get it all down in time, he tossed a bag to Vera, who started stuffing the grass into her mouth and swallowing as fast as she could.
“The cops are going to get us!” Shelly wailed. “We’re going to jail!”
Andy held a bag out to Chris.
She shook her head. “I’m driving.”
He turned to Debbie and held the bag out to her.
“No way!” she said emphatically. “We’re pregnant, remember?”
The police cars were almost on top of them. Chris kept glancing nervously into the sideview mirror.
“Faster, faster!” Chili said, chewing furiously and swallowing as quickly as she could. “You better step on it!”
Chris sped up, but the police cruisers kept on gaining.
Their cheeks were all stuffed to capacity.
“Faster! Eat faster!” Shelly cried.
“Come on, help us!” Vera said, handing him a fistful of grass. “Come on!”
“Uh . . . I guess I’m just not hungry,” Shelly said, grimacing with distatst and pulling back from her.
“You’re always hungry, Shelly!” Andy said, his mouth
