“You will get no sympathy from me. You did this to yourself.”
“I need Tylenol before I can even think of finding the will to live.” Katie groaned and massaged the side of her head. “The older I get, the longer it takes me to recover. Even the sound of my own voice is killing me...”
“Maybe your new friend has a charm that could help.”
“Who?”
“Conner?” Katie gave me a blank look. I jogged her memory with a simple gesture, forming a circle with my left thumb and forefinger, pumping my right index finger in and out. “The bartender?” I added, just to be helpful.
“Ooooh,” she managed. Then, as her memory kicked in, a grin spread across her face. “Ooooooh, yes. That Conner.”
“Worth the cost?”
Katie just gave a sleepy giggle and waved me off. She paused to pick at something on her shorts, then added, “So, more about you, less about me. How was last night?”
“Mm, well...” I had some pause about telling my eternally blithe BFF about all the events, but in the interest of honesty, I gave a very surface retelling of the story, including my magical transformation.
Katie gave me a slow clap. “Woo, yay, great story,” she said, oozing with sarcasm. Then her eyes narrowed, as she looked me over. “Holy shit,” she said. “I know this sounds like a cheesy pick up line, but… have you been working out?”
What, you too? I thought. “Not… exactly.”
“How’d you get so hella buff, girl?” She reached out to give my bicep a little test squeeze. “Jaysus Kee-ryst, I need some of that magic.”
“C’mon. You’re not that bad off, are you?” I reached over to feel her forehead.
She swatted my hand away and sat up. “Besides the pounding in my head, and the slight taste of vomit still in my mouth?”
“Let’s not forget the about the cock… -tail purveyor you boned.”
“I guess I did have a better night than you did.” Katie said. “Besides, I already heard about your encounter with the Three Stooges.”
“Uh, what do you mean? Who filled you in?”
Katie straightened up and gestured to the sky as a certain raven swooped down and landed on the ground next to her. “Yo, Poe.”
“‘Yo’ to you as well, Katie,” Poe said directly into both of our minds.
“Your pet was incessantly pecking at your window this morning,” Katie said. “But you were sleeping like the dead, so... I let him in, and we had a very interesting conversation.”
“I am never going to get used to that telepathy thing,” I said.
“You might as well,” Poe said. “You may find much stranger things in your head than someone else’s words. Such is the nature of magic.”
There kind of already is, I mused, throwing a tiny block at my mind flame, which caused it to turn around a flap an annoyed little flaming hand at me. “Thanks for reminding me, Poe,” I said flatly, though all my sarcasm was wasted on birds.
“No problem,” the bird ventured. “Although, I wouldn’t mind a piece of jewelry.” Poe preened under his wing.
“What for? Diamonds are a bird’s best friend?”
“Despite my exalted status among ravens, I share my breed’s instincts. Can’t quite shake the obsession with shiny things.”
“Right. I’ll find you a ball of tin foil.” My focus went back to Katie. “So, uh, Poe spilled the beans. What’d you think of all that?”
“Well, thinking?” She rubbed her temples. “That activity hurts my brain,” Katie said flatly. “But all’s well that ends well, right?”
“Katie, we all nearly died! How can you be so totally unaffected?!” I folded my arms after scolding my friend.
“Easy, killah,” Katie suddenly shifted into a precise infomercial voice. “But wait, there’s more!”
“More bullshit? Why am I not surprised?”
“I didn’t waste my limited thinking time about what already happened. Girl, I was busy thinking about what has to happen next.”
“And that is?”
“Besides the obvious, staying alive? You need to find a way to kill them.”
“Kill them?” It made sense. Self-defense is one thing, but... Katie went ahead with the fatal logic. “Obviously, our Fantastic Four can’t defeat them. We’re talking ancient, immortal beings here. I’m 99.99% positive they don’t play by the same rule book as the rest of us.”
“Okay, I buy that, but—”
She kept talking, though. “No Morals equals No Restraints. They will stop at nothing.”
“We don’t... well, how do you know for sure?”
“Duuuh!?” Katie looked at me like I was three. “They’re EVIL.”
For all of my best friend’s faults, she had an incredibly logical, beyond brilliant mind. Any time she formulated a plan of action, whatever it was, I always ended up thinking my own IQ was dropping like a thermometer in Fargo.
“In order to defeat something so ancient,” she reasoned, “we need to go back to the beginning.”
“Okay… because…?”
“Because their mother was stripped of her power. That’s what started this whole Hatfield-McCoy feud bullshit in the first place.”
“Okay. But if they are immortal, isn’t it impossible to kill them?”
“Didn’t the Morrigan kill their mother?”
“I guess… maybe things were different way back then. Whatever. The point is, I have no idea how the Morrigan defeated them.”
“Correct. But there are people — well, beings — who are just as ancient as your Three Stooges. And there’s a good chance they’d know what to do.”
I thought about that. “Could be. But how does that help me?”
“Remember, as a fairy, I’m a member of the Seelie Court? I’ve got a friend who’s a bit more ‘in’ on court affairs than I am. Also, she kind of owes me a favor or two.”
“Really...”
“The Seelie Court keeps records on everything. I mean everything, from the beginning of... the beginning. The knowledge they’ve amassed
