Pain I can do.
Pain I want.
Pain I desire.
The ideas have an unfurling reaction inside me. Like my insides are melting and alive with something so close to the Allure Roarke hit me with in the attic that first night.
Suddenly, the darts fall to the ground, and his hand snakes around my stomach. He pulls me back into him – hard. His whole body is tense, rumbling. Wanting.
His power rushes over me, and I damn near gasp in the pleasure of it.
Wisps of black smoke smooth over my skin where his fingers have begun to dig in. I arch my back, but it’s not to get away from him. My head is screaming that this is so so so very dangerous – but my body is singing a very different tune.
Singing the sweet taste of a connection from my soul to his, and the drowning distraction from everything other than his touch. Even if the air is already harder to breathe. The light dimmer. The world colder.
He picks me up off the ground. My back pressed against his chest means the hardness in his pants isn’t being concealed one bit.
He turns sharply, snagging the towel in his other hand and depositing me beside the rack of clothes. The towel over my head.
“Enough nakedness,” he says, letting me go.
The magic pulls from my skin as his touch slips away, leaving me gasping.
I can’t see. I’ve got a towel over my head, but I can hear someone storm up the last two steps and let out a long growl.
I tug the towel down and wrap it around myself.
Pax is in the doorway. Eyes glowing. Teeth long and sharp. He’s not even looking at me, all of his attention on Killian.
“What? Do you have an alarm that goes off every time one of your brothers –” I cut myself off, and Pax finally looks at me.
Thane just growls, ready to attack, and his teeth have to retreat before Pax can translate the sound into words.
“Your lips are blue,” Pax snaps.
I press them together. They feel fine, so without a mirror I can’t confirm their color. The reaction is weird, but I’m pretty sure the reason is Killian.
Leaning back a little I meet his gaze to ask, “Why are my lips blue?” But I already suspect it has something to do with the depth of cold around him.
Which doesn’t scare me – it excited me – because it means he’s relaxing his power around me. It means he’s beginning to trust me.
“You’re weak,” he says, poking me in the back of the shoulder.
I roll my arm back and try to shoo him like a fly.
“I’m always weak, and you guys are the ones who tossed a steaming hot potion on me.”
“You’re weaker,” Pax says. “Roarke explained the side-effects. Whatever resistance you had before, it’s not there now. You need access to our powers to survive us, but our powers are killing you.”
“That doesn’t explain why my lips are blue.”
Killian leans forward to whisper in my ear. “The Shadows are cold.”
“Killian shouldn’t be playing with Shadows anywhere near you,” Pax growls. “Next time we get Seth. Pace your bubble.”
I obey, but the steps are the same – three.
Killian sighs, not a reaction I think I’ve ever seen from the guy, then he turns to leave.
“Roarke was right, cutting you off has plugged the leak,” Pax says, sounding equally as relieved.
“This sucks,” I mutter, yanking a set of clothes off the rack. “Shut your eyes,” I order, not checking that either of them have obeyed before I drop my towel and pull on a shirt and braies.
Just a shirt, and braies that are a whole lot shorter and cover a whole lot less than wearing the guys’.
I don’t care. I’m too tired to deal with any of this crap.
“I’m going to bed.”
Pax cups my chin, tilting my head so my gaze and his align. “It’s still morning. Why are you tired?”
“No, it’s not, it’s at least late afternoon.” I glance at the window to check.
“Morning,” Killian grunts, hesitating by the exit.
Morning. Right, I woke, trained with Killian, made shit vanish into the Silvari version of hell, had my boyfriends ambush me with a potion that ripped their presence from my soul, and managed to give myself a bloody nose and burn lines like lightning into my arms all in one morning. I don’t care. I need sleep, now.
But first I need to deal with my choice of internal descriptions.
“Would you consider yourselves my boyfriends?” I ask… because, yes, in all of that my connection with these guys and relationship status was the most important thing.
Killian growls. “No.”
“No,” Pax agrees, and the guy is seriously frowning.
I swallow hard. Reality check, Shade – kissing doesn’t equal a relationship status.
Thane’s features wash over his face, a stronger jawline, the glowing eyes, the sharp teeth again, and a hint of fur through Pax’s hair.
“Mate,” he says.
I shake my head. “Not really. I mean, we can’t be. Also not lovers, and,” I add, then point at Killian, “you’d better not say we’re just friends.”
“I don’t do friends,” Killian growls. “Don’t do mates or girlfriends or lovers.”
Well, I know he does lovers because Rose said as much.
“What would you call this, then?” I ask, waving between the two of us.
“This,” Killian says, pointing from me to himself slowly. “This is fate, and I do pain.”
Chills run down my spine in anticipation of something mixed between desire and fear.
“Enough of this,” Pax orders, then rattles off some quick orders, instructions that are getting old and rely on one key line. Find the Spring.
There’s no hesitation as Killian leaves or Pax nods at the bed, and I sag under the weight of knowing sleep will distract me for at least a few hours.
With heavy limbs I crawl over the foot of the bed and up to the
