“What would you have us do?” Teegan asks, rushing to add, “We can’t avoid Lithael’s attention. We don’t have the same kind of grace as you do.”
“We need tact and stealth at this point. Keep Logan busy, keep him broken and in pain. But you have to play him into challenging you to a tournament,” Pax says.
Rose scoffs. “We can’t. Women and men don’t compete against each other.”
“That was before the first mixed pentad was born,” Pax says.
I resist the urge to look over my shoulder. Bralls, I wish I could, because a rock just sank to the pit of my stomach, and I’m pretty sure I’ve been played. Somehow. Somewhere. Someone has used me.
Pax did lay down logical reasons why they risked everything to make me a Saber. Maybe I was stupid for thinking there were also emotional reasons. Maybe there are emotions now, but there weren’t then – not when all of this began. I struggle against the desire to feel like an idiot.
A complete and utter fool.
Their mother spelled out a prophecy that somehow made me part of the solution. Is this that part? To allow their female warriors into the arena to balance out the overwhelming number of male enemies? To create some kind of battle equality?
Which means my job’s done – right?
The one thing to fight a grimm is something that’s finally dead.
Wait until your grief has passed, then – Seek the remnant beyond the border.
Speak to a man named Martin but believe the word of a bird.
Let your reflection go hazy in clear waters and see instead through a gray lens.
In Silvari glass is a blade that can pass, a soul that can kneel, and a world that can heal.
This is not a battle that can be won. Before this time can pass, the mortal soul from its beginnings cannot last. There is no way a soul can rule and live.
Because I heard what the Origin Spring said to the tallest forest tree – the key will be in the last of me.
That first line, the one Killian was afraid to share so he made it vanish in smoke back when we were in the cave, that one about the thing that will fight the grimm is something that’s finally dead.
In my downward emotional spiral, I know I’m jumping from one crappy conclusion to the next, but what if…
… What if that thing that’s finally dead is long dead and never physically goes near the grimm at all. What if the thing is a she, and she is an instrument in leveling the playing field and everything happening right now is the moment the tides turn, is the stone-in-the-lake-ripple-effect that brings the grimm down?
My presence has changed this society – job done?
Killian is still keeping that line to himself, so it must be important. Or scary.
Or both.
All these thoughts tumble through my head during a long pause. I’m pretty sure every pair of eyes just turned to size me up. Me, who is basically cowering in Seth’s shadow. I chose not to be a part of this conversation – chose to sit lower than everyone else. To not even face them.
I chose to present myself as a servant.
And let myself be used as nothing more than the female who broke the arena’s gender rules.
And, as my nose struggles to function through a bitter-metallic bite in the air, I’m pretty sure I chose wrong.
Chuck.
“I was wondering if the rumors are true,” Teegan says.
“I was wondering if I’d have to kill her,” Rose adds.
There’s a low growl from Pax, cut off by Killian’s hard-as-stone voice. “I’d enjoy tying knots in your entrails while you’re still alive.”
Double chuck! These Sabers want to kick my ass. Followed by Pax throwing away every chance he has of keeping their allegiance by pigheadedly protecting me. Even if the protection comes ten minutes later and in the form of killing everyone.
A part of me wants to fix this, stop him from doing something stupid. But another, possibly bigger, part of me would rather kick someone’s ass – anyone’s – to prove I’m worth more than just an instrument to change a stupid law!
Walk right into the middle of this group and put one of them in their place – hard. Like Rose. Just punch her in the jaw, or the nose, or something to do with her chuckin’ pretty face.
“We need some of you to become Logan’s friends,” Seth says, and he sounds happy about it. “So he doesn’t suspect your motives. Become his friends and have accidents at training or whisper in his ear, bad advice to challenge others to a tournament.”
I feel the vibrations of his voice through his back and into mine, making me lean into the sensation. He’s so full of confidence, and I just want to soak a little of that up – or a lot.
Maybe punching Rose is a bad idea, but confronting her sure isn’t. That’s what I need to start planning. Just me and her.
Just like dealing with the biggest bull in the paddock, once that one’s compliant, the rest behave themselves.
“We need Lithael to keep the Saber ranks in place. We need Logan’s sister, Kyra, to get the call. If Lithael disbands the White Castle before then, we’ll lose our chances of keeping track of those two,” Pax says. The gravelly texture to the words hinting that he’s still settling the angry wolf inside of him.
“Well, we know Logan isn’t there, and I’m pretty sure we’ve lost track of Kyra too. Lithael
