That didn’t look to be an option today.
“What’s up with you?” Derrick demanded. “You look ... different.”
Uh-oh. “I think that’s just wishful thinking on your part.”
He wouldn’t let it go. “Are you sick?”
“Sick and tired of stupid questions.”
“How are things at work?”
“Fine. Normal.”
He hitched his thumbs under his utility belt. “I’ve known you most of my life. That first nine months I had to myself before you joined the family was the best ever, but I’ve learned to adjust. Heck, I’ve even gotten used to you over the years.”
“Should I applaud that revelation?”
He barreled forward as if he hadn’t heard the snark. “I know you and I know there’s something going on.” To my surprise, he reached over and rested his hand on my shoulder. “You’re not still in trouble at work, are you?”
He was asking out of true concern. That was a good thing ... at least in his mind. Sure, I would’ve preferred being left to my own devices — to sulk and hide — but I lived in the real world. And, because I was good at my job, that meant I had to deal with him.
“Work is fine,” I said, choosing my words carefully. “It’s the same.”
“It can’t be the same. You almost lost your job over that whole Tad Ludington thing. I’m sure you’re still worked up over that.”
Confusion washed over me. “Are you moonlighting as a psychologist?”
“No. Why?”
“Then why do you even care how I feel?”
His chest heaved and he squared his shoulders. “Because you’re a person. You have feelings and they need to be expressed. It’s not good for you to hold things inside.”
That was the biggest load of horse manure I’d ever heard. “Um ... I was under the impression that everyone in the family believed emotions should be held in check until the inevitable explosion leveled everyone inside the safe distance. I’m not quite ready for the public humiliation portion of that blessed family event, but the second I am, you’ll be the first to know.”
Derrick scratched the side of his nose but kept staring. I could tell he was caught between two emotions.
“What’s up with you?” I opted to take control. “Why are you suddenly trying to Dr. Phil me?” A horrible thought occurred to me. “Did Eliot put you up to this? Is he trying to get me to confide in you? That’s cheating, and I don’t like it.”
Derrick’s eyebrows drew together and he looked more confused than ever. “Why would Eliot put me up to this? Is something going on with Eliot?”
I’d overplayed my hand. “No. Is something going on with Devon?”
“Isn’t there always something going on with Devon?”
Now we were getting somewhere. He wasn’t questioning me out of concern for me. He was questioning me because of something his pregnant fiancée was foisting upon him. This I could deal with. “What is it now? Does she want you to learn to express your feelings?”
Derrick’s eyes went wide. “How did you know that?”
“Lucky guess.” I waffled on Devon. Seventy-five percent of the time I hated her. The other twenty-five percent I tolerated her. A few weeks ago, she’d helped me through a difficult time — for nothing in return — and our relationship was on solid ground for now. I didn’t want to rock that particular boat.
“She thinks I’m closed off emotionally,” Derrick volunteered.
“So?”
“That’s what I said.” He shot me a relieved grin. “I told her it was a family trait — we live on caffeine and snark, after all — but she doesn’t think it was funny. The baby is due in two months. She’s decided that I need to learn to talk about my feelings if we’re going to live happily ever after.”
That was patently ludicrous. “Happily ever after is a myth. It’s something Disney concocted to sell movie tickets. Nobody is happy forever.”
“Agreed. But she brought up a few good points.” He looked uncomfortable as he shifted from one foot to the other. “I don’t want to be emotionally distant from my kid. I want to be a good father.”
I took pity on him. “You’ll be a great father.”
“Devon thinks otherwise.”
“She’s watched too many Hallmark movies. People say horror rots the brain, but it’s really Hallmark movies. They give people unrealistic expectations when it comes to romance. It’s a bunch of crap.”
My mini-diatribe earned a smile. “I agree with you, which is terrifying. I guess it doesn’t matter. I was simply trying to be a good listener when I asked you about your feelings. It won’t happen again.”
“That would be awesome.” I inclined my head toward the deputies working about fifty feet away. “What do you have?”
“A dead body.”
I rolled my eyes. “I never would’ve guessed. What kind of dead body?”
“It will likely lose something in the telling. You might want to take a look for yourself.”
It was rare he invited me to a crime scene. That had my inner Avery-sense tingling. This story might turn out to be good after all. I fell into step with him. I knew he wouldn’t let me get too close to the body, but he didn’t stop me until I was about twenty feet from the tracks.
It took me a moment to realize what I was looking at. The first thing that rushed to my mind was that I had landed in the middle of a horror movie. I thought the sea of red was blood. There was a light dusting of snow, not enough to cover the scant grass and the railroad ballast, but enough to wash out the color on the ground. That’s why the red was so jarring.
Then the entire picture came together.
“Is that ...?”
Derrick nodded, a grimace sneaking past his barriers. “A dead Santa Claus? Yup.”
“No way.” I moved closer without invitation. I’d never seen anything like this, not even in a horror movie. I couldn’t tell up from down. “What happened to him?”
“That’s the
