“Kareisha had been quiet for months, and that was a part of her plan because when I started to think she went away, she popped up and left Jasmine on my doorstep. At that time, your mother and I were pretty serious and moved in together. Jasmine was almost one years old, and I had no way of contacting Kareisha or knew of any family she had. I honestly didn’t know her. I couldn’t bring myself to place Jasmine into foster care because, during the time I kept her while looking for her stupid ass mama, I had grown to love her. And Jasmine grew to love me, she was my baby, and she didn’t deserve the life she was given.”
“That’s so sweet, daddy.”
“I know, but I got arrested probably just three months later and was looking at a serious time. I still feel like Kareisha had something to do with me going to jail. I don’t know how, but the way everything happened, it seemed like a setup. After a month of being locked up, your mother said she was pregnant. She seemed like she was going to hold everything down, and she was fine with raising Jasmine as her own.”
“But she folded and dipped. Never looking back ever again.” I said with so much hate in my heart. Maybe that’s why I never wanted kids because of her.
“Yeah, she dipped with my money and left y’all behind. I never intended for you and Jas to be separated. I didn’t know my mama put her up for adoption until it was done. I felt bad because I knew we were the only family she would have, and I wasn’t there to stop it. I haven’t talked to her in years because her punk ass foster mama stopped accepting my calls and returned my letters. I know she hates me. But I want her to one day know the truth and decide on her own if she wants to keep a reltionship with meor not. I know I’m not her real dad, but I still care for her like I am. She needs to know the truth, and if she wants me to be in her life, I’ll be there. I heard she got married.”
“Yeah, a few weeks ago. It was a lovely ceremony, and her husband, Domo, is a great guy. He reminds me of you.”
“Really? Well, despite my record and life in the street, I’m a good guy. So I know he’ll take care of her.”
“Well, you’ll always be a good guy in my eyes too,” I said as I walked over to hug him for the first time since he's been home. I must admit I was very standoffish when he first came home, because I didn’t know how to handle everything. I’ve never had a relationship with him. He was gone before I was even born. I’ve only known him through phone calls and letters. My grandmother used to take me to visit him, but after turning five, he didn’t want me to come anymore. He later told me in a letter that he knew I didn’t want to see him like that. It was something about the look in my eyes, and that pained him.
“Thanks, baby girl. I know we don’t have the normal dad/daughter relationship, but I swear I’m going to fix that. Just be open to letting me be the father I should’ve been.”
“I’m open to that.”
“And also be open to us starting a new life in California. I got permission from my probation officer for the relocation, and one of my friends said he has a job for me. I just need to go there to find a place. Your mother didn’t have access to all of my money, so I have enough for us to be comfortable for the first year.”
“Is this a legal job?” I asked.
“Yes, very legal. It’s a construction company, building those big buildings and fancy houses in LA.”
“When do you plan to go find a house?”
“Next week. I need to have something before my P.O officially sign off. I thought you and Big Mama would come with me so we can get a little vacation in and spend time together. I remember you telling me you loved the beach.”
“You did?”
“I remember everything you told me in those letters. I still have them. And with your permission, I plan to put it into a book. I want to write an autobiography about my life, and a lot of it will be a reference to our letters.”
“Really? You want to write?”
“I already started, but yeah. I always liked English in school and used to write poetry too.”
“That’s something I didn’t know. English was my favorite subject too.”
“I know. So what do you say? A fresh start?”
“Let’s go visit and find a house first, then I’ll let you know. DC is home to me, all that I’ve ever known, and my family is here. Not to mention, I have a god-daughter, and I know my best friend needs more than ever now that she’s here.”
“Bre, right? Kington’s little girl.”
“Yeah. You know her dad?”
“Yeah, we go way back. But that’s another story for another day.”
“Oh gosh, you and your stories, daddy. Y’all don’t have beef do you?”
“No! Kingsley and me became good friends before I got arrested. Hell, he’s the reason you know Bre, and he's the friend that referenced me to the guy that’s giving me that job in Cali.”
“Really? I thought we just coincidentally met in preschool.”
“Probably did, but Kingsley offered to pay for you to go to that school since Big Mama couldn’t really afford it. He never wanted to overstep his boundaries, but he could identify with my struggle as a father.”
“Wow, I can’t believe that story never came up.”
“There’s probably a lot of stories that haven’t come up. So we’ll go visit Cali next week, and I’ll let you decide, but your grandma is also considering moving away too.”
“Ugh! Y’all not really
