“Why not? If you’re so upset about the wayI’m treated?”
“Because your situation puts me in mind of asimilar one for me about two years ago. Do you recall right afterWilliam left for the Army, and I needed someone to work in thebutcher shop?”
Tillie nodded. “You and Mother talked about anumber of boys to apprentice.”
“Yes, we did, and in the end, we chose ayoung man who never even applied for the job.”
“Sam.”
“Yes, Sam. We picked him because we believed,with his father in prison and his poor mother overwhelmed by hercircumstances, we needed to get him out of that havoc and into aChristian home. I took a lot of guff from people who thought memad. Everyone said he would murder us in our sleep or rob me blind.Mr. Garlach, in particular, warned me time and again, trash istrash and I should leave it alone.”
“Mr. Garlach said such a thing about Sam? I’msurprised. He treats him so well.”
“He does now, but in the beginning hedisliked and mistrusted him, as did many in this town. The sins ofthe father visited on the son, I suppose. We can’t deny his fatheris a disagreeable black spot on our town’s character. My point is,we did what we knew in our hearts was right. Right for us and rightfor Sam. We were led to choose him, and while we didn’t get half asmuch heartache as you, we can and do understand your position.”
Approaching the front gate of Camp Letterman,Father let out a low whistle.
Tillie laughed. “This is nothing compared toAugust. You should’ve seen it then. It’s about a quarter the sizenow.” She took his hand. “Thank you, Father, for telling me aboutSam.” Rising on her tiptoes, she kissed his cheek before walkingaway, chirruping a good morning to the guard, who smiled andreturned the greeting.
* * * *
Tillie entered the tent and went straight toTommy’s cot. He rolled over, presenting his back to her. Sheignored the rebuff. “I brought something for you, Tommy.” She puther basket on his blanket and reached into the bottom. Out came abeautiful piece of maple. Laid in her hand the block fit the lengthof her palm to her fingertips. The wood, sanded smooth and soft sothe user wouldn’t pick up splinters.
He refused to acknowledge her.
Tillie used the wood to nudge him in theback, hoping to provoke him.
“Go away.” He waved his arm in her direction,a feeble gesture of dismissal. “Leave me alone.”
“I’ll not.” She pushed him again. “Youwhittled the other day. I talked to my father, and he went to myneighbor, who gave me this piece of wood.” She laid the block onhis hip, on top of his blanket. “This is my way of saying I’m goingto make your life miserable until you decide to stop feeling sorryfor yourself. If that doesn’t work, I’ll read Bible verses to youall day about the sin of self-absorption.”
The other boys laughed.
“Give him Hades, Miss Tillie,” Private Jonesheckled.
“Give up the fight, boy,” Sergeant Davishollered over. “She’s got you in her sights. You don’t want to bein the way when her cannons go off, do you?”
From where she stood, she saw Tommy’s faceturn a deep scarlet. “Let him alone, boys. I think he gets thegeneral idea.” She held her hands out, pleading for silence. “Lethim be.”
Tillie left his cot and set about building awarming fire in the stove. She ignored Tommy for the rest of themorning.
* * * *
The orderly brought their noontime meal, soTillie went to the dining hall. For the hundredth time, shewondered she if did the right thing, baiting Tommy. But kind andgentle sympathy didn’t seem to work, and she couldn’t think ofanother way. She started praying, an unformed prayer, unsure whatshe wanted to ask. With the boy bound for prison camp, she knewenough to understand he had a slim chance of surviving, even underthe best of conditions. As she walked and prayed, a sense of peacefilled her soul. The same as she’d had in Beckie’s bedroom afterreturning from the battlefield.
Near the dining hall, Nellie emerged from atent, almost colliding with Tillie. “Nellie!” Tillie’s hands shotout in a reflex to stop the collision.
With a startled “oh,” Nellie jumped back, asthough to avoid touching Tillie. “I do beg your pardon.” Her toneformal and stiff.
“That’s all right.” Tillie shrugged. “I hopeyou weren’t hurt.”
Nellie didn’t answer and, without anotherword, strode away, quickening her step to put distance betweenthem.
Tillie’s heart pounded, and hot tearsscorched her eyes.
Nellie glanced back and walked faster. Shetoo, headed for the dining hall.
Tillie walked slow enough to ensure she didnot catch up with the older woman. Why didn’t people try tounderstand? Why did they judge? “Judge not, lest ye be judged,” shesnarled under her breath, then closed her eyes, took a deep breathand repented.
Be still. The words echoed in her mind.
After her meal, she returned to the tentdetermined not to let her neighbors’ actions affect her attitudewith the boys. But, when Tommy shoved something under his blanketbefore turning his back to her, something in her snapped. Shemarched up to the foot of his cot and dropped her hands on her hipsthe way Mother did when annoyed. “You know, when I first saw youthat day after church, I honestly felt sorry for you. You looked sohungry and a bit silly in your outfit several sizes too big, butmostly, you were hungry. I wanted to invite you in for lunch,that’s how much pity I had for you. But you’re nothing but aselfish, spineless whiner. I should have saved my pity for someonefar more worth the energy.” By the time she finished, her voiceshook from the emotions surging through her.
He met her diatribe in complete silence,though his blue eyes rounded big as saucers.
Tillie stared hard at him, willing him to saysomething, anything,
