“Ellie’s not well. I . . . we . . . need your help. It’s—”
“Unless this is a life-or-death situation, I don’t want to know. I have work to do, and I won’t get distracted by another one of your and Ellie’s silly little adventures.”
Lottie stayed firm.
Jamie always did whatever he could to keep everyone at a distance. A comment like that would have upset her a year ago, but now she knew her “silly adventures” had led to her finding her place in the world, and that was more than Jamie could say for himself.
With Jamie preparing to close the door, Lottie shoved her foot into the doorway, holding her ground, not even wavering when he looked down at her, eyebrows raised in surprise.
“I want you to race me,” she told him.
The look of shock on Jamie’s face would have been hilarious if this weren’t so important.
“Why would I ever do something so ridiculous?” He crossed his arms, biceps bulging, as if to remind her how much stronger and faster he was than most people.
“Because,” Lottie replied, “if you win, I promise I will never ask you for a single favor again. You can just focus on your Partizan duties, and”—her next words caused her physical pain, knowing that none of this was her fault—“I won’t distract you.”
His face was impenetrable, making it impossible to tell if he liked the idea or if he was reeling from shock.
“But,” Lottie warned, “if I win, you have to hear me out.” On second thought, she quickly added, “And you can’t get mad.”
“This is a big waste of time,” he said eventually. Lottie’s heart sank, until he continued, “But if this is what it takes to persuade you to stop kidding around, then so be it.”
He turned back into the room to get his things, leaving Lottie to catch her breath. She could hardly believe he’d really agreed.
“I’ll meet you by the gate of the West Garden in fifteen minutes,” Lottie called after him, her fingers curling into fists.
And I’m definitely going to win, she added in her head. Because if she didn’t get Jamie on their side before they spoke to the king and queen, then they might as well give up now.
The sky was unusually clear above the Maravish palace. Even though it was freezing outside, streaks of sunlight through the evergreen trees filled the air with glitter. Lottie batted it away, remembering the story of the Snow Queen, and not wanting her heart to turn to ice.
“First one to lap the pond and make it back across this”—Lottie unfurled a red ribbon over the gravel path—“is the winner.”
“Pond” was a particularly unceremonious word for the great body of water in the west side of the palace gardens. With the top frozen over, and the sheer size of it, the “pond” was big enough to be an ice rink. Ellie had promised Lottie that she’d teach her to skate on it one day, but Lottie had always chickened out. It looked too deep, too cold, too deathly.
In the center stood a mossy statue of the goddess Artemis, a bow and arrow poised and ready, pointed directly at them.
“We start when this goes off.” Lottie placed her phone on the stone steps opposite the pond and set the timer for one minute. “Are you ready?”
Jamie shrugged, indifferent in his black tank and matching hoodie, a stark contrast to Lottie’s peach sportswear. He was taller and stronger than her; it seemed obvious that he would win.
“Let’s just get this over with.” He took position next to Lottie, legs braced.
Breath like smoke mingled in the air.
I’m going to win this. Lottie willed the thought to life. I’ll show you what I’m capable of.
The timer beeped, and they were off! They tore across the frozen grass, and Lottie blanked her mind. She didn’t think about the race, she didn’t think about the journalists, the failing grade, or why Leviathan had caused it. Nothing could catch up with her if she ran fast enough. This is what she’d learned after the attack at the Tompkins Manor, that there was power in getting strong on your own. Not once would she have dreamed that young Lottie, puffing, aching, and humiliated from a single training session, would grow to love the freedom of running. She hadn’t needed Jamie to teach her. She’d only needed to be unstoppable. Her time with Ellie had taught her that.
The frozen grass crunched beneath their feet, where they left ghostly footprints with every furious step. A taste like metal flooded her mouth, her chest aching from the cold, taking in great gasps of air to propel herself forward. It wasn’t until she was halfway around the pond that she realized she was falling behind Jamie, only a little, but that gap slowly spread wider, like stretching an elastic band. The pressure built up, her legs screaming every time her foot pounded the earth, and still the gap grew. They were so close to the finish line now; he was going to win! If she didn’t snap back, he was going to win.
Lottie let out a screech, feeling the elastic band pop, springing forward as they approached the ribbon.
But it was too much for her. Her knees, still sore from her fall at the gates, gave way and the world tumbled around her, the cold hard ground slamming into her body, just as Jamie’s feet came down purposefully over the ribbon.
She lay sprawled on the ground, panting. Humiliated again. Jamie reached out to help her up, but she shoved him away, clambering stiffly to her feet without his assistance. She trembled as she rested her hands on her thighs, bending over to draw in ragged lungfuls of cold air. She watched a single bead of sweat drop to the ground and spread, melting the ice.
Her plan had failed, and it wasn’t until she looked up again that she realized she hadn’t even made it over the finish line.
4
“I’M NOT
