Anna found herself distracted by the white trousers. What was it about them that he found so irresistible? She very much didn’t want to be thinking about them at all, but couldn’t avert her eyes from them. The Dane had great legs – was it that? Anna, with all her insecurities, did at least know that she herself had a couple of fine pins. It occurred to her that she didn’t in fact own a pair of white trousers herself. Maybe she needed to rectify that? Why didn’t she have any white trousers? Could it be that they looked a bit … cheap … trashy, even? Why was she thinking that? The Dane was neither, quite the opposite, but … the white trousers … sort of were. Is THAT what he liked about them?
Stop fixating on the white trousers!
Anna felt like a headmistress opposite two naughty children in her office. It was clear that it was for her to chair this strange moment, although, in truth, it ought to be different. By rights, they should be begging her forgiveness.
‘Please can you open the curtains, Julius.’ Anna deliberately used his full, formal name.
He meekly complied, but as he rose and went over to the window, his dressing gown flapped open and up, at which point Anna noticed that in the hurry he’d put his pants on back to front. The pee gusset was on his arse. His considerably smaller arse. Anna had the surprising sudden realization that she had preferred him when his arse was more considerable, that this over-exercised and dieted reduced arse was boney and ageing … and vaguely feminine.
Stop fixating on the arse!
Anna had a fleeting, collusive eye-lock with the Dane where she could have sworn she detected a shared embarrassment about the pitiful sight of this twat with his literal knickers in a literal twist …
‘So, listen, we need to be grown up about this. Julius, do you love … her?’ Anna ventured into dangerous territory with zero hesitation.
He was stumped. The lids were off all his boxes, and everything he had hitherto compartmentalized was mingling in a way he’d never intended. She knew that this was an impossible question for the adulterer to answer. He was so unfamiliar with speaking the truth. It would stick in his craw.
‘Well …?’ said the Dane, impatiently.
‘Umm. I love YOU, Anna,’ he said quietly.
‘Pardon?’ Anna had heard him perfectly well, but wanted him to have to repeat it louder.
‘You heard me,’ he said with a tinge of irritation.
Anna stayed silent. Boomingly silent. He was forced to speak. Eventually …
‘I love you, Anna.’
‘Only me?’
‘Jesus, why are you making this so hard?’
‘GUESS!’ she retorted.
And waited.
‘YES. Only you,’ he whispered as he hung his head.
‘So, are you saying that you want to pursue a relationship with … her … or are you saying this … affair or whatever it is, will cease? Please, please, answer honestly,’ said Anna.
All this time the Dane was following the conversation very closely, alternating between Anna and Julius as if she were watching tennis. Now she stared right at him, while he averted his gaze.
‘I want to save our marriage. I don’t want to be this man any more, but you must understand all the stress with Florence has been—’
Anna snapped. Her eyes were ablaze. ‘DON’T bring her into this. Don’t you dare sully her with this. Don’t speak her name in this shitty room, or I will end you, I swear, right now.’ She recovered her composure as quickly as she had lost it, and continued: ‘So am I to understand that you are prepared to live a faithful life with only me as your lover from now on? Please answer honestly.’
‘Yes. Yes, I am.’
At this point the Dane wanted to have her say. ‘Mrs Lindon-Clarke—’
‘Do call me Anna. We’ve shared the same dick, after all.’
‘OK, Anna. I want you to know that none of this was personal …’
‘Oh, it’s personal, believe me.’
The Dane pressed on bravely. ‘I want you to know that he approached me. Seriously. I didn’t really even fancy him. I want you to know that.’
‘Charming,’ mumbled the injured adulterer, adding a childish, ‘You didn’t resist much.’
The Dane continued unabated. ‘I mean, I feel a bit odd now because the way he’s being here now is not how he is being with me. I s’pose that’s obvious, but he told me stuff …’
Julius was panicking. Shush, please. Come on. Stop it. The dam was about to burst.
It did.
‘Listen, Joojoo …’ the Dane continued.
(JOOJOO?! Anna felt physically sick.)
‘This whole scene is utter shit, but the woman deserves the truth.’
(THE WOMAN??! Anna felt physically sick.)
‘He told me that it was pretty much over between you two ever since your daughter … was pinched.’
(PINCHED??!? Anna felt physically sick.)
‘That you stopped loving him, or having the sex with him or even holding him. He said he felt unloved and unwanted …’
(UNLOVED??!! Anna felt physically sick.)
‘He cried when we were in the gym, and I … cuddled him.’
(CUDDLED??!!! Anna felt physically sick.)
‘And he said that even that slight touch was like rain in the desert …’
(Anna felt physically sick.)
Julius attempted to stop her. ‘That’s enough.’
‘No, let her finish, she’s only telling her truth.’
The Dane picked up the baton. ‘He told me that he’d never done anything like this before.’
(Physically sick.)
Julius put his head in his hands. Even he, with all his brazen denial, couldn’t look Anna in the face on this particular front.
‘Oh. God. So that’s not true then …?’ The krone had finally dropped for the Dane.
Julius mumbled something incoherent into his hand facemask.
The Dane continued, ‘Right.
