It hurt to even think about him, much less see him.
She wasn't sure if she was a fool for seeing something different in him or blind to the real man behind the drinking and drugs.
Either way, she was the one hurting. He was probably on to his next woman, his next drug, his next good time.
Blowing out her breath, she picked up the phone, found the number for the clubhouse, and dialed. The call connected. Loud music blared into her ear several seconds before a gruff voice came over.
"Is Paco there?" she asked.
"Let me look." The music filtered through the phone.
Her foot bounced under the desk, imagining him there with another woman. Glancing at the clock, she timed him.
Five minutes later, Paco said, "Yeah?"
"This is Banks' Body Shop. Banks wanted me to ask if you could come by after closing today?" Her pulse throbbed in her neck.
All it'd taken was one word in his deep voice to get her going. She held her breath, knowing if he spoke a complete sentence, she'd probably lose the control to hold back her tears.
She was going to treat him as if he was a business associate. Professional and courteous. Whatever had gone on between them was over. She was working.
She would not fall apart. She would not ask how he is doing. She would not—
"Josie?"
"This is Banks' secretary. He wanted me to call." She cupped her forehead. The conversation was ridiculous. She shouldn't be the one who had to act differently.
He cleared his throat. "Tell him I'll be there."
"I will. Goodbye." She slammed the phone down in the receiver, unable to hold back her frustration. A lot of good that had done her. He probably couldn't hear her rudeness over the music blaring in the background.
She walked out to the garage, passing the message to Banks. Then, she went back to her desk to work.
By the time the clock turned five o'clock, she had the top of her desk cleaned off and held her purse at her side. She wanted to get out of here before Paco showed up.
Hurrying to the garage, she opened the door and stuck her head inside. She caught Slick's attention. "I'm leaving now. The answering machine is on."
"See you tomorrow, Josie." He lifted his hand.
She smiled and turned to walk through the building when the door at the other end of the hallway opened, and Paco walked in. Caught between running back into the garage to avoid him and knowing he headed straight toward her, she stood her ground. By the time he was within ten feet of her, she had found her courage and walked forward.
Nodding, instead of saying hello, she continued to the door. She went straight outside without looking back. The sight of his motorcycle put her in a funk. He hadn't even spoken to her or stopped walking.
She opened her car, threw her purse on the passenger seat, and got behind the steering wheel. Whatever.
Fuming, she went straight to Lainier's Towing and parked outside the gate to wait for Cami. Less than two minutes later, Cami hurried toward her.
The slight breeze pressed Cami's shirt to her front. Her mood drastically improved. The baby bump obvious to anyone looking.
"Thank you so much for coming with me to the doctor's appointment." Cami fanned her face before opening the window. "I'm nervous."
"Don't be." Josie smiled at her. "You'll get to hear the baby's heartbeat."
"I know." Cami put her hand on her stomach. "It's so exciting."
"Maybe you'll get one of those ultrasounds and can find out the sex."
"Oh, remind me to ask about that when I'm there." Cami pointed. "You turn right at the light, and you'll see the building. You can park right out front."
Following directions, she parked in the doctor's parking lot. Together, they walked inside and checked Cami in with the receptionist. She was happy to go to the appointment with Cami. It got her mind off Paco and kept her away from the apartment. Being there only reminded her of being with him.
Chapter 18Paco
The Saturday night crowd at Promise pressed against Paco's back. He motioned Hammer over. His MC brother stayed busy tending the bar.
"I'm going to hightail it out of here. I'll catch you later." He got up from the stool at the counter. "What time is the meeting tomorrow?"
"Not until eleven o'clock."
He knocked on the counter and then weaved his way through the crowd. It was more comfortable at the clubhouse. There, everyone was in the same boat, wearing the patch.
The warm night settled on him. He'd nursed one beer since riding out tonight.
He wasn't in the mood to drink. The last time he let loose would hold him for a while.
Pulling in front of the clubhouse, he scanned the line of bikes. For a Saturday night, only thirty or so bikers were about.
Curley walked out of the shadows of the building and headed toward him. "I thought you'd be here earlier."
"I stopped in at Promise." He walked inside the clubhouse with his vice president. "It's packed over there."
"With the crew in California, it's a quiet night here. I was thinking about heading home."
"Did Faye let you go out on your own?"
"Nah." Curley pointed to the pool table. "The ladies grabbed her the moment we got here. Joey's challenging Wyatt to pool, and he's getting his ass handed to him."
He peered over at the game. Rick and Tracy's oldest boy ran into his leg and crashed onto the floor. He righted the kid.
"It's like a fucking daycare in here." The sight of the kids in the clubhouse only confirmed his belief he belonged here. It was the closest he would get to have a family of his own.
Curley chuckled. "Future Tarkio, man."
"Yeah." He slapped Curley's back. "I'm gonna book."
"No drink?"
He shook his head. "I'm good."
Leaving the clubhouse, he headed home. Whether his mood or the lack of sleep over the last week, home seemed like the best place for him. With Tarkio laying low while
