Had her body not betrayed her.
Shoving the memories aside, she gripped the railing hard enough that a splinter sank beneath her skin. “Becky, please. Come with me. He can’t force you—”
“Yes, he can.” A wary glance over her shoulder told Charlotte exactly why Becky was whispering. “I know why you’re here. I know you don’t understand why I’d back out of the adoption. Trust me, if I had any choice, I wouldn’t. But I—”
“Who you talking to?”
The barked question sent a jolt through Becky’s body. Her eyes went wide, her grip tightening on the door just before it was torn from her hand. Richard towered behind her, his unshaven face and stained white tank so cliché Charlotte would’ve laughed if she wasn’t so busy trying not to reveal a hint of fear. The man’s mean eyes narrowed on her, turning her knees to water.
“Why you here, rich bitch?”
Speak, Charlotte. Becky needs you.
“I came to check on Becky.”
A heavy palm landed on Becky’s thin shoulder. The girl jumped. “Nothing for you to check on here, lady.” The man sneered. “We don’t need your charity no more.”
How had such a sweet girl come from this asshole?
“Becky doesn’t—”
“That’s right, she don’t. Her bastard don’t either. She don’t have to go through with no adoption. Now get out of here before I make sure you regret bothering us.”
She glanced toward Becky, whose face had gone ashen. Worry for the girl kept Charlotte in place. “Sir, I just want—”
A growl tore from the man’s mouth as he shoved Becky aside. “Get off my property, bitch!”
His bulk pushing onto the stairs caused Charlotte to teeter backward. One heel slipped from the step. For a second she thought she could pull herself back upright, and then she was falling through the air, her stomach lurching at the loss of equilibrium. Pain slammed into her as her butt landed on the concrete pad below the stairs.
Becky’s father huffed a laugh. Staring down his nose, he hocked out a glob of spit that landed perilously close to her hand. “Remember what I said. Come back and I’ll make you regret it. Becky ain’t your concern no more.”
The door slammed behind him, the slide of the chain lock being repositioned reaching her ears past the ringing that filled them. It took a minute before she could gather herself enough to struggle to her feet, seconds when she searched the windows of the trailer in hopes of seeing Becky’s face, making some kind of connection with the girl she’d grown so close to, but no face appeared. No sound came. Nothing.
She stood, dusting dirt from her backside with hands that shook like leaves, uncertain what to do. Whatever it was, she couldn’t do it alone. “I’ll be back, hon. I promise,” she said, knowing Becky couldn’t hear her but desperate to let the girl know. It felt like a betrayal to walk back to her car, slide behind the wheel, but what choice did she have?
David hadn’t defeated Goliath empty-handed. Her only choice was to find her stones and return to battle. That didn’t make it easier to back the car away from the trailer and drive off. She didn’t feel like David; she felt like a monster, leaving the victim with her abuser.
Without conscious thought, without a decision on her part, she pointed the car toward home, but when she reached the turnoff, she kept going. That same mindlessness took her miles down the road, south of town, past Lake McIntosh. Toward the piece of land that, no matter how lush with trees and hills, no matter how soothing the rocky creek that wound through its heart, shouldn’t be a balm. It should be a reminder of all she’d lost because of her own foolishness.
Too bad it was the only place she felt truly safe.
The canopy enveloped her car in hushed shadows as she nosed her way onto the dirt road, the only access to the property. That was all it took for the hard shell she’d surrounded herself with back at the trailer to crack.
Why are you doing this? You know you shouldn’t be here.
And yet here was the only place she could just be, where she could let the shaking overtake her and cry the tears choking the back of her throat and give in to the fear shuddering through her in soul-sucking waves. Here, where no one could see. Where no one knew how weak she really was.
Where she could pretend that the arms that used to hold her safe, right here in this very spot, were still around her.
It was stupid. Senseless. That didn’t stop it from being true. The sobs came, shook her down to her bones. She sobbed until her stomach turned to stone and everything inside it threatened to come back up. Her chest went tight as a drum and she had a hard time breathing, but she let herself ride the waves until, finally, the stress subsided.
Long minutes later the muffled ring of her phone pulled her back to reality. Scrambling in her purse, she felt the cool rectangle of her cell all the way at the bottom and pulled it out. A glance at the screen brought a groan to her lips.
She tapped the green circle. “Mom.”
The word wasn’t as bright and cheery as she’d like, but hopefully it was close enough to fool her mother. Both her parents were supportive of her work, and at thirty they recognized the futility of convincing her to do anything else, but if they knew someone had threatened her? All bets would be off.
“What’s wrong?”
Thank God her mom couldn’t see the grimace that twisted her mouth.
