I cried myself to sleep that night, pining for my lost love. Everything I had dreamed of, everything I had wished for was an empty shell. All my castles in the sky came crashing down around me as reality reared its untimely head.
I tossed and turned as images of Rafe and Katerina flitted through my mind, teasing me and taking pleasure in my misery until the light of the morning sun warmed the floor and awoke me to another day.
I was done.
I had to forget about Rafe. Never again would I let myself love someone so completely that they would have the power to rip my heart to shreds as Rafe had managed to do. He hadn’t accepted as yet, but the fact he was considering it made me feel sick.
As I lay in my bed watching the sunrise, I realized it was my own fault. I had brought Lilith back, and Lilith killed Rafe’s father and took his throne. Now the Blackwaters were in complete control of Eldoren, and it was all because I didn’t have the sense to listen and trust there were others who might know a little more than I did. I was rash and foolish, and so excited I had magic that I never thought about all the consequences my actions would bring.
I dressed quickly and ran down to the kitchen, picked up freshly baked honey cakes, and proceeded to the training ground.
I didn’t feel like talking to anyone. I wanted to be on my own.
Tristan was already practicing while he waited for me. Wordlessly, I picked up my staff and ran at him. Tristan sidestepped and sent me sprawling to the ground. I jumped up, my muscles faster, stronger. I opened myself to the magic around me and shifted my feet; bracing myself, I blocked Tristan’s first blow.
He grinned. “Finally.”
But I was not in the mood to joke.
I twirled my staff, knocking Tristan’s out of the way, and thrust. He blocked me again, but I kept going. Everything happened in slow motion when I concentrated. I could predict the blow before it came, I could feel my muscles respond as I used every move I had learned so far to fend off Tristan. Again and again I struck, my blood roaring in my ears as I twisted and turned, ducked and jumped, blocking and avoiding blows faster than I ever thought I could move. Finally I got one strike in, hitting Tristan in the stomach with the end of my staff. Tristan glared at me and knocked me down, disarming me.
The fight was over.
He stood over me and gave me his hand. “Much better. I think you are finally ready to accompany me on a scouting mission.”
I stood up, brushing the dirt off my tunic. “It’s about time.” The fight had not brightened my mood, and I scowled at Tristan.
For the first time he didn’t scowl back. “What’s wrong? Why the sour face?”
“It’s nothing. I’ve had a bad night, that’s all.”
Tristan came closer and put his finger under my chin, tilting my head up to look at him. His dark blue eyes bore into mine. “Tell me. Did someone hurt you?”
I shook my head. But then I couldn’t hold back my tirade and I told him all about Rafe and what Penelope had said about him marrying Katerina Valasis to save his kingdom. Tristan listened without interrupting; I was glad there were very few soldiers training on the field that morning, giving us some privacy.
Finally he spoke. “So let me get this straight. Your perfect prince was courting you while he was engaged to another, and now that he is free to marry whomever he wishes, he is contemplating marrying someone else.”
I nodded solemnly. It sounded worse when Tristan said it like that. “He hasn’t decided yet, but he hasn’t said no either.”
“Well, all I can say is that he is an idiot. If he doesn’t think you are worth fighting for and gives up so easily, then he doesn’t deserve you anyway. He sounds like a coward to me.”
I smiled at that. It felt good to talk to someone who didn’t know Rafe personally and who didn’t think he was the best thing to happen to this world since Auraken Firedrake. In fact, Tristan didn’t think much of him at all.
Although I was so angry with Rafe, I heard myself defending him. “He’s not a coward. This is the only way he can gather an army to take back his kingdom.”
“Is that what he is telling you?” Tristan’s eyes narrowed. I could see the silver swirls that lit up the darkness within them. “There is always another way, Aurora. And if he truly loved you, then he would find it.”
I looked down at my feet. “The truth is, it was my fault he lost his throne in the first place. I don’t think he wants anything to do with me anymore.”
“Well, that’s his loss then, isn’t it?” Tristan went over to the rack and drew a sword. “Forget him and concentrate on your training. We don’t have much time left.” His sword lit up.
I drew my own sword, pushing my magic into it. It lit up as well, burning with silver fire. I knew Tristan was right, but it still hurt to admit it. I had my own life and my own throne to take back. Rafe was doing what was best for him and his people, and I had to do what was best for mine.
The Elder Council
Lessons with the dowager were canceled for the meeting with the Elder Council. I was nervous about meeting the other fae elders. As
