Veronica’s brows rose. “Being what?”
“Quee,” Simon replied. “It’s what the infected called themselves.” He patted Lana’s hand. “They even had their own language.”
“We,” Lana corrected. “WE had our own language.”
“Right,” Simon sighed. “We. I was one too.”
“You were our alpha,” Lana stated softly. “He saved us when we were about to starve to death.”
“Oh, really?” Veronica crossed her arms and looked at Simon. “How did you do that?”
Simon blanched and avoided her gaze. “I wasn’t too keen on the whole ‘eating people’ thing. I gathered them all up and we moved into a grocery store. I taught them how to open canned food.”
“He saved our lives,” Lana reiterated. “If it weren’t for him, hundreds of us would have starved.”
Simon shrugged. “I just remembered what real food was.” He looked to Veronica. “There’s nothing we could try?”
She sighed then stood and reached into a cabinet. “If it’s some kind of neurological damage, the best remedy is sleep.” She handed him a small bottle of sleeping pills. “The brain is a complicated organ, and it heals best with plenty of rest. The deeper the sleep, the better.”
Simon took the bottle and slid them into his pocket. “Do you have a moment? Maybe we could talk?” He glanced at Lana. “Alone?”
Lana nodded slightly and stood, pulling her t-shirt down firmly. “I’ll see you back at the RV.” She kissed him lightly on the cheek then stepped out of Veronica’s trailer.
Simon watched her enter their RV then turned to Veronica. “First off, thanks for checking her out. I know you didn’t want to.”
Veronica shuddered slightly and nodded. “It’s my duty.”
Simon scoffed. “You could have told her to go pound sand.”
“I did it for you.” She glanced through the window at their RV. “You’re sort of stuck with her.”
“That’s just it.” Simon sat back and shook his head. “Am I?”
“Yes.” Veronica stood and began packing her equipment back into her examination bag. “You are. She looks to you for—”
“She ate a live fuckin’ rabbit.” His face was stern. “She can take care of herself.”
Veronica sighed and set her bag on the floor. “What do you want from me, Simon?”
“I want…” He trailed off. His eyes searched hers for a moment. “I guess I want what I can’t have.”
“What’s that?” She crossed her arms and shook her head at him. “I told you. What happened between us was a mistake.”
“No it wasn’t.” He stood up and paced the small area. “But I feel like I’m…”
“Stuck?”
“Torn.” He sighed as he leaned against the counter. “I feel an obligation to her.” He looked up and searched her face for a reaction. “But my true feelings are for you.”
“Feelings that we can’t act on.”
“We.” He snapped his fingers. “There. You said it. WE. As in we BOTH have feelings for each other.” He groaned as he stepped toward her. “Tell me you don’t care.”
“I can’t.” She looked up at him. “I can’t tell you that. But it changes nothing. You have a responsibility to her.”
“We’re not married. She doesn’t rely on me for food or protection. She’s her own person.”
“With a mental disorder that sends her into a blind rage.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “Like you said, she ATE a live rabbit. Then she hung the leftovers on my door and wrote ‘bitch’ in blood. You expect me to say, ‘yeah, let’s run off together’ when your psycho wife would just as soon gut us and…” She trailed off, catching her breath. “Even if she wasn’t certifiable, the answer would still be no.”
“Why?” Simon asked. “Guilt?”
Veronica threw her hands into the air. “Because it would be wrong.” She kicked her bag and fell onto the narrow couch. “I’m not a homewrecker, Simon.”
He sat down across from her and shook his head. “And I’ve never had a ‘home,’ Vee.” He lowered his eyes and sifted through ancient memories. “I had a wife once. When all of this shit went down, I went looking for her. I found her and my best friend…” He choked on the words and had to force them out. “They were still…in position. Dead.” He looked up at her, hoping she’d understand. “Thing is, it tore me up pretty good. I turned to booze. Pills. Women.” His face flushed with shame. “Violence was my answer to everything. I pretty much stayed in a drunken stupor. It was my way of coping.”
“You must have really loved her.”
He looked up at her and scoffed. “I cared for her. Hell, I had to. It was my ‘duty’ as you say.” He sat back and shook his head. “Truth be told, I was more upset about Dennis poking my old lady behind my back. We were tight.” He turned and looked at her expression, expecting shock. She stared at him blankly, waiting for him to go on. “He was the closest thing to a brother…”
“You felt betrayed.”
Simon nodded. “Among other things.”
“Imagine how Lana would feel if you broke it off with her…for me?”
Simon bowed his head and blew his breath out slowly. “So, you and I…we’re supposed to suffer. Do without. Live loveless lives just so Lana doesn’t feel rejected?”
She stood and placed a hand on his shoulder. “I can’t answer that. But I can tell you that you have a responsibility to her.”
“Why? Because I kept her alive through the infection? Because I saved her and the rest of them from starving?” He placed his hand atop hers and brushed his thumb across the top. “This whole mess has taught me that life is too short not to try to be as happy as I can be.” He looked up at her. “You make me happy. In all of the dreary, miserable, insufferable emotions and thoughts
