When she releases me, she wipes at her cheeks, and I’m taken aback yet again to discover that she’s crying. She offers me a watery smile and holds out the key. “Here you go,” she says. “I’m glad you’ll be close by. We have all this free time now, so I fully expect for you to join me for girls’ nights. Especially since …” She waves a hand as she trails off, and my heart falls, since I know she’s referring to Mason and me and our apparent break up.
Taking my hand, she tugs me to the couch. “How are you? How have you been doing? And what actually happened?”
I give her a wan smile and swallow down the tears that threaten to well up at her questions. “I’m okay. I mean …” I flop my hand around awkwardly and decide to be honest. That’s my new thing. Honesty. Telling people how I actually feel and not just trying to bottle myself up and make myself fit into a box they’ve created for me. Not that Kendra’s tried to put me in a box, but old habits die hard, after all.
Shaking my head, I correct myself. “Actually, no. I’m not okay. I’ve been miserable. I went home to my parents’, which was a terrible idea. My mom’s been a mess since I took the job with Cataclysm, and she absolutely lost her shit when she saw the pictures of Mason and me circulating online.”
Kendra looks confused. “What? Why?”
I let out a humorless chuckle. “Why to which part? Why doesn’t she want me working for Cataclysm, or why did she lose her shit about Mason?”
“Yes.” She makes circles in the air with both hands. “All of that.”
“Where do I even start?” I take a deep breath and organize my thoughts. “She thinks I’m slumming it, basically. That I should want bigger and better things for myself than working as an assistant for a band. Of course, the jobs she’s tried to set me up with are all boring admin assistant and receptionist jobs. I’m not sure why being the PA for a band is worse than those. The pay’s better, the perks are better …”
“The eye candy is better,” Kendra finishes with a wry grin.
I laugh, this time a real laugh. “Too true. When they all take off their shirts? Damn.” I fan myself, and Kendra laughs too.
“I know. That’s my favorite. They all objected at first, but I think they like being ogled now.” Her face turns serious. “But for real, you’re a grown woman, why are you letting your mom have so much say in your life?”
I shrug. “I’m not. Which is why she’s been losing her shit. I mean, I used to. But I took this job against her express wishes. She thinks it’s just a phase, and she’s been badgering me about coming back home all along. I usually just let her talk and make soothing noises to get her off the phone faster. So I didn’t bother telling my parents about Mason, because I didn’t want to hear their opinion. Well, my mom’s opinion. My dad doesn’t really give his opinion much, he just tells me to be safe and not be a stranger.”
“But?” Kendra prompts. “That doesn’t explain what happened with you and Mason. If your mom’s been like this all along, he must’ve known, right?”
I tilt my head from side to side in a gesture of ambivalence. “Kinda? I told him some, because he could tell I was upset after talking to her a few times. He knows that she didn’t like that I took the job. But he never knew the full extent of it, the way she’d send me applications and job notices. This time she really overstepped. She actually set up an interview for me during the break.”
“Oh my god. Tell me you cancelled it.”
I shake my head. “It was this morning.”
Kendra examines me in silence for a moment. “But you’re here, so I imagine that means you didn’t take the job.”
“I didn’t even finish the interview.”
She claps her hands and then holds them over her mouth. “Good.”
I chuckle. “I interrupted him before he could even finish his introduction and left. My mom was furious. But I told her that I knew her opinion and that I don’t care anymore, packed my things and left.” Covering my face with my hand, I shake my head. “She’s called five times since I left, and I know this isn’t over, but I’m not answering her calls right now. I’m not quitting my job to take some boring, soul-sucking job that I don’t want. I like what I’m doing. It’s fun and you guys are awesome and …”
“And there’s Mason,” she says, once again filling in my blanks.
“Yeah. There’s Mason.” Raising my head, I meet her sympathetic eyes. “How’s he doing? Is he here? Or …?”
Reaching out, she clutches my hand. “He’s here. Next floor down. He hasn’t left his condo since he got here, as far as I know. Aaron’s been to see him, and he’s giving regular reports to Marcus. I know they’re worried. But Aaron’s been tight-lipped about whatever happened between you and Mason, just saying it’s not his story to tell.”
A fresh wave of tears floods my eyes, and this time I let them fall. “I’m glad he’s okay,” I whisper. I know what he does when he has something to work through, and I was afraid of what he’d do. I’ve been watching the entertainment news like a hawk, both searching for and dreading the inevitable picture of him out partying. But there’s been nothing.
I’d hoped it meant he wasn’t out doing that. That he wasn’t out trying to put me in the past. Because despite how hurt I am that he left like he did, I’m not ready to let go of him. Of us.
Standing, I clutch the key to Blaire’s condo in
