‘I see,’ said Dover thoughtfully, ‘What about climbing out of a window?’
‘Not a hope, sir! All the ground-floor windows have got bars on ’em and I check ’em every week when I’m doing my inspection. Nobody could get out that way. I don’t think you need bother about my little squad in here, sir. I’m prepared to bet that not one of ’em as much as opened their flat door after I’d locked up on Tuesday night. They used to trip around for hours, visiting each other, when I first came here, but I soon put a stop to that. I didn’t issue an order or anything – you can’t do that with civilians, can you? – but all the floors are laid with lino, ’cept the hall and that’s parquet. I soon got the cleaners to put a good shine on it – come up a real treat it has. Well, naturally, the old dears don’t like it. Scared of slipping and breaking their poor old necks. They’re hardly likely to go wandering around after I’ve put all the main lights out, are they? It’d be suicide! Beside, I keep my own door ajar so I can hear if any of ’em are creeping about. I always go up and ask ’em what they’re doing if I catch one of ’em. They don’t try it on often these days and nobody as much as moved a muscle on Tuesday night.’
‘I see.’ Dover contemplated Bondy with no little respect. ‘Have you been here long, Mr Bondy?’
‘Oh, getting on for five years now, sir. I came here straight after I left the army. It took me a bit to get things licked into shape, but everything’s running very smoothly now. Lots of people told me I’d never settle to civilian life after all that time in the army, but I can’t say I’ve had much difficulty. The job’s much the same whether you do it in uniform or in civvies in my experience. A recruit training school or a houseful of retired gentry-it’s all human nature, isn’t it, sir? I use the same technique and I get the same results.’
‘I’m sure you do,’ murmured Dover.
‘’Course, I’ve had my little difficulties,’ said Bondy, anxious to be fair. ‘Mrs Chubb-Smith’s a very nice woman, I’m sure, but no backbone, you know. You’ve got to keep prodding her to get anything done. D’you know it took me six months to get her to see sense about dogs and children?’
‘Dogs and children?’ repeated Dover.
‘Yes, sir. She used to let the flats to anybody, anybody at all. Place was swarming with kids and animals.’ Bondy pursed his lips in a self-satisfied smile. ‘But we’ve put a stop to that now. I let ’em keep a tank of tropical fish if they want a pet Dogs and cats is out! So’s kids! I’ve got a very nice class of tenants here now, quiet and well behaved. But that’s only because I put my foot down with Mrs Chubb-Smith. You can see what she does when she’s left on her own.’
‘You mean the people living in the houses?’
‘I do indeed, sir. They’re as fine a collection of layabouts as you’ll find anywhere, most of ’em. There’s that Bogolepov chap – bloody pansy if you ask me! My word, I’d like to have him as a recruit for a couple of months. Not that young Michael Chubb- Smith’s all that much better, but he does shave regular, I’ll say that for him. And then there’s that writer woman, Miss Hoppold. Have you read any of her books? Enough to make your hair stand on end. I saw a few dicey things when I was seconded to the Commandos during the war, but it was nothing to some of the things she describes. Not nice, that sort of thing, in a woman.’
‘What about Colonel Bing?’ asked Dover maliciously.
‘Barmy,’ said Bondy shortly. ‘Makes you wonder what the army’s coming to, doesn’t it? But I like her, mind, always calls me “Sergeant-Major” and speaks respectful like. And come to think of it, she’s no barmier than plenty of men I’ve known with red tabs on their lapels.’
‘And Sir John Counter?’
‘Oh, he’s an old devil, he is! But he’s a gentleman and that makes a difference somehow, doesn’t it? He’d have made a good officer, he would. Absolute swine but a professional, if you know what I mean. I do quite a lot of odd jobs for him and to hear him going on, it takes me back twenty years or more. I served under a major just like him. He was a real pig, he was. First time his mob saw action in the war, he got it! In the back and I’ll stake my pension it wasn’t a German bullet.’
Dover blinked slighdy at this jovial reminiscence but pressed on. ‘What about the Freels, do you know them?’
‘Not really, sir. Hardly ever see him. You know they never speak to each other, I suppose? Write each other little notes, so I’ve heard. But they always partner each other at bridge. Gawd only knows how they manage then. Still, it takes all sorts, doesn’t it, sir?’
And on this happy note of soldierly tolerance the interview came to an end.
Dover and Sergeant MacGregor got back into their car.
‘That’s a relief, sir, isn’t it?’ asked Sergeant MacGregor. ‘Looks as though we needn’t bother about all those people in the flats.’
‘Hm,’ said Dover, who had just been thanking his lucky stars for the same thing. ‘Of course,’ he pointed out grumpily, ‘we don’t know that Bondy was telling the truth.’
‘But surely those old crocks can’t have had anything to do
