He lets out a little laugh. “Or it’s because we wear matching suits, matching rings and we were holding hands?”
“Maybe.” I shrug. “You think you’re ready to join the rest of the party now, companion?”
“Yeah, yeah.” He takes a deep breath, then his hand tightens around mine a moment. “We can’t drop the ball now. We have to keep this up.”
I know what’s on his mind. I know who he’s thinking of, why he agreed to do this, at least in part. Last year, an Alpha high up in his company, a guy a year or two older than us, committed suicide. Turned out he’d been in a relationship with another Alpha and he’d kept it a secret for years. But everything had gotten to him and he couldn’t live like that anymore.
He took his own life because, at parties like this, they’d push the Omegas onto him, like they do with us, while his Alpha partner of six years was standing no more than an arm’s length away. He couldn’t tell anyone, because it would ruin their careers, and he couldn’t live with that prospect. It had gotten too much for him and he’d felt like death was his only way out. It hit Spence hard, he’d known the guy pretty well, but had no idea about any of the Alpha’s struggles.
“Don’t worry.” I squeeze Spence’s hand back as I pull him from behind the plant and back into the room.
I’m not going to let him down. I know that Spence isn’t only into Omegas, he’s told me as much, years ago. I need to do this, not just for the guy who isn’t here anymore, but also for the Spence who might be, who could be, who could have been. I need to do it for him too. I’m not letting my best friend down, no matter what.
“You always make me worry.” He bumps his shoulder into mine and I catch a glimpse of his smile.
“What are partners for?” I smirk.
Yes. We can do this. Together, we can do this.
But it doesn’t help with the feeling I had when I saw Cyra with the other two Alphas. No matter if I can’t do anything right now. I can’t go near her, because I’m not sure I can keep my own brain and mouth in check and I won’t let something stupid slip out, ruining everything we’ve done today.
Better to try and avoid her. I want to storm over to her, take her from the Alphas and get her out of here. No matter if it sounds ridiculous, to feel like that over a human, but I really want to do it.
15 Spence
My heart is racing and my grip on Zack’s hand is probably a little too tight, but that might just make this all the more convincing. Why did I think this was a good idea? Why did I agree to any part of this plan?
My parents are going to be furious when I come home after the party, and I don’t think it would be safe to crash at Zack’s place either, his dad is going to explode. I’m not sure whose parents I’m going to dread facing more right now. It would probably be best if neither of us went home tonight, but at the same time, that might also make everything worse. Neither option seems to be a good option.
We should have thought of the sleeping arrangement thing before we came here. We should have thought of a backup plan before we showed ourselves to the world... We knew people would not react well, we should have planned for that. This is why simply following Zack’s plan is usually a bad idea. What are we going to do when the party ends? Ugh.
While I try to think of what’s going to happen next, after the party, next week, a month from now, the Gala passes me by. I hope I’m saying the right thing, nodding, smiling, all of that, at the right moments. It’s hard acting like I’m not shitting my slacks out of fear for our future when I barely notice anything going on around us.
Our parents aren’t going to kick us from the companies. That would only bring even worse PR for them, bad PR they can’t use right now. They could make us resign, make it so we won’t have another option... Though the company will lose clients regardless, no matter what happens. If they let us stay, they’ll lose clients who think that they’re too ‘liberal’, but if they force us out, or if we have to leave, they’ll lose clients over being too ‘conservative’. We’ve forced our Alpha parents’ hands and we’ll have to live with the consequences.
I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone but Zack at my side, for all his foolish ideas and his impulsiveness, he’s fiercely protective and I know that he won’t do anything to hurt me. He won’t. At least, not willfully. He might not have thought through all the potential consequences, but he’ll be there with me no matter the fallout.
The whispers around us haven’t quieted down, but at least the party seems to have mostly gone back to normal. Mostly. Few people talk to us, and when they do, it’s mainly polite conversations. They’re not pushing their kids onto us, not trying to get favours from us.
It’s a pleasant change from most other parties, but it also makes me feel like crap about how differently people act when they find out that two Alphas are in a relationship... Their behaviour changes instantly. I knew it would happen, but to experience it is a whole other thing.
“Spence?” Zack leans closer, his voice low, soft. “Let’s get a drink and check out that garden we talked about before.”
I nod. I could seriously use a drink and some quiet. I
