“You okay?”
She avoids my gaze. “Fine.”
She hesitates, standing close enough to touch.
I suck in a breath. “Look, if this is about last night, don’t worry. No hard feelings. You were right.”
Finally, Rae looks me in the eye. She dips her chin down ever so slightly. “I appreciate that. Excuse me.”
I watch her sidestep around me and head toward the garage. A few moments later, her car turns on, and Rae drives away.
12
Rae
It’s been three days since I almost kissed Benji, and my body still hasn’t recovered. Every time I see him, fire roars to life inside me.
How it is possible for one man to have that much effect on me?
Maybe it’s the softness of his gaze, juxtaposed with the strength of his body. Whatever it is, I always find myself slipping my hand between my legs late at night, imagining what it would feel like to have him on top of me.
Then, when I see him in the garage, my whole face turns red and my heart starts to thump.
Vicious cycle.
Stupid girl.
Irresistible man.
Today, though, I have something else on my mind: My dwindling bank account balance. In my attempt to provide for Lucy and Roman while setting up the garage for Sawyer to take over, I’ve somehow miscalculated my cash needs.
My parents noticed and won’t stop calling me. Yes, I’m going to fire my accountant, and yes, I’m going to change my bank account details. I may be strapped for cash right now, but I’m not going to rely on my parents anymore.
I have another solution.
Lucy doesn’t approve. She stares at me with those big, sad eyes.
“Rae, you love that car!”
I shrug. “It’s just a car.”
“I won’t let you sell it.”
“I have to, Lucy. We don’t have enough money to furnish this house and make sure Roman can be in daycare when your classes start. I need a little bit of cash until I can go back to work. I might be able to get some freelance landscape design work, too. Willow said she’d look at a proposal for the Black Estate, but it could be weeks until that money comes in.”
“You can’t, Rae. You got that car when you were sixteen. I’ve seen the way you take care of it.”
“Which is all the better now that I’m trying to sell it.”
“No.” She crosses her arms, shaking her head. A tendril of hair trembles as she stares at me. “I won’t let you, Rae. You’ve sacrificed too much for me. That car means everything to you.”
I sigh, shrugging. “It did when I was a teenager. Not anymore.”
“What about the garage? Isn’t that providing some money?”
“The books are a mess. I don’t want to give myself a wage until I’ve had a good accountant look through it all.”
“So, you bought a business without looking at the books? You moved us over here without talking to Sawyer first? You want to move up here with no income? Come on, Rae. That’s too much sacrifice. Too much risk. You don’t need to do this. Roman and I will be fine.”
“It’s just a car, Lucy.”
“It’s your car. It’s the last thing you have that’s all yours. You bought the garage for Sawyer, and you bought the house for me. What about you? When are you going to do something for yourself?”
I grimace, shaking my head. “I’m doing this for me, Lucy. Bringing us and Sawyer back together and having a real family again is for me, too.”
“You can’t sell it. I’ll get a job in town. Maybe Sarah knows someone.”
“And your paycheck will all go to daycare for Roman, and we’ll be right where we started. You know that. We need cash, Lucy.”
“Ask Mom and Dad for some.”
I scoff. “Dad called me last night to chew me out about my bank account balance. Started telling me I needed to learn to manage my money better and tried to guilt me into taking the board position.” I shake my head. “If I take their money, they’ll hold it over my head until the end of time.”
“But Rae.” Lucy sighs, shaking her head. “You can’t keep giving everything up for me and Sawyer. We don’t even know if Sawyer wants to see us.”
“I’m not giving anything up, Lucy,” I lie. “This is what I want.”
Her bottom lip juts out, and I wrap my arms around her.
“You do too much, Rae,” she says, her voice muffled in my shoulder.
I pull back, smiling at her. “We’ll see Sawyer soon, and it’ll all be worth it.”
“I admire your optimism.”
“Learned it from you.” I smile. My phone buzzes, and I let out a sigh. “The buyer is here.”
Lucy’s eyebrows draw together, but I turn away before she can say anything else.
Of course I don’t want to sell the car. It’s a last resort, but it’s something I have to do. Lucy and I need some cash for the next few months, and I won’t ask my parents for money. That’s a surefire way to get wrapped deeper into their world, when I’m trying to get out. I need to prove to myself that I can stand on my own two feet—and I need to prove it to Sawyer, too.
I’m here to bring my family back together again. That’s the goal. That’s what I’ve been working toward for three and a half years. That’s what will make it all worth it.
Sawyer will understand that, won’t he?
When I get outside, two middle-aged men are admiring the bright, white Aston Martin in the driveway. I flash them my best smile, spreading my arms.
“What do you think? Want to take it for a test drive?”
“Hell, yes!”
I laugh, even as a crack splits across my heart. The three of us climb into the car. I take the passenger seat and hand the keys over, ignoring the pain in my chest. The prospective buyer is a man with gray hair. He lives in the next town over and sent me a message about ten minutes after my
