“So you grew up here?” I ask.
“Mhm.”
“You’re pretty lucky,” I say.
“Yeah, I guess…” His face is almost not red anymore. “It’s okay, you can ask.”
“Ask what?”
“You want to know, don’t you? Why he adopted me.”
I shrug. “Because you harmed your family somehow. Who among us hasn’t done that?”
“Have you?” he asks.
“Obviously.”
I look down at my food and take a big bite of mashed potatoes. It’s so smooth and buttery.
Hunter, practically finished with his own food now, jumps in and asks Remington something about the game tomorrow, so they launch into sports talk. Grateful for the change of subject, I ignore them. I focus on the taste of the food, savoring it and pushing away thoughts of the announcement I have to make. Probably soon, judging by the way Li keeps glancing at me.
I love this food. I love myself.
Li stands up.
My heart races. I love myself.
Li steps up onto the stage.
I put my fork down. I love myself.
Li goes to the podium.
Everyone is silent now. The only thing I hear is:
I love myself. I love myself. I love myself.
“Hello, everyone,” Li says, beaming. “I hope you’ve had a good dinner. I’d just like to make some announcements. First, Valeria and her team have returned safely, and no bad news about the giftists.”
Everyone claps and cheers.
When the noise dies down, Li says, “Second, Kyle has finished his second task!”
The cheers are significantly more subdued.
“Poor sucker,” Hunter says under his breath, clapping quietly.
“She tells everyone about the tasks?” I say in a low voice, hands shaking.
Hunter and Remington nod.
“Next,” Li says, “there is a kickball match tomorrow in the field at 10. Please come and watch the Flamethrowers and the Earthshakers in their final match of the season.”
Some young kids shout and holler over each other, some saying “Flamethrowers!” and the others saying “Earthshakers!”
“Which one is yours?” I say to Remington, trying to calm my nerves.
“Flamethrowers,” he says, avoiding my gaze. “It was their idea.”
“And finally,” Li says, raising her voice to silence the hollering kids, “as some of you may know, we have a new member joining our camp today.”
My heart just about stops.
“Today, she will introduce herself and do her first task,” Li says.
It’s dead silent. Even the low muttering that slowly built up while Li was talking is gone.
“Chrys?” Li says.
She looks at me, making everyone else turn my way too. I freeze. She gestures for me to come.
Hunter leans over and whispers into my ear, “You said you’d do them all, remember? You backing down now?”
I breathe out and focus on the rough wood below my thighs. Then I stand up, a bit shakily, and head to the stage. There are no steps going up so I heave myself up using my hands.
Li steps aside and I take her place. She hovers beside me, watching me, like all the others.
“Um,” I say. I look into the crowd. Most are unfamiliar faces, but I spot Hunter and Remington nodding me on, Valeria with a grim look on her face sitting in the back with people I don’t recognize, Jayden and Tam at a table near her with expectant and smug looks.
“My name is Chrys…” I say.
“With a y,” Hunter shouts, smiling.
I chuckle. I actually chuckle. And I remember this afternoon when we spoke, and that tiny shred of confidence I somehow mustered back then. I remember that feeling. It’s nowhere near as strong now but I remember it. And then I speak.
“Yes, with a y. I’m glad to finally have made it to Camp Amaryllis. Um… like Li said, I’m going to do my first task… now. She asked me to tell you what my gift is so…”
Everyone’s eyes are fixed on me. Some look bored, some curious, some doubtful. They hardly blink.
“So,” I continue, gripping the front of the podium, the wood digging into my palms. The confidence is shrinking fast, with every word. My voice gets quieter and quieter as I speak, “My gift is death…”
Muttering. Confused looks. I look away from them, down at my hands on the podium.
A hand on my back. “You’re doing great,” Li says quietly. “Keep going.”
I grip tighter. “If I touch someone with my hand… I can make them die… of a heart attack of something. But it’s quick and painless.”
“How do you know it’s painless?” a little girl’s voice asks.
“Uh, well, it seems that way,” I say, still not looking up, “because it happens in an instant. No time to really feel anything.”
“So you don’t really know then?” the girl says.
“Uh…”
“Can it work through clothes?” a boy asks.
“No,” I say. “It has to be skin to skin…”
Sighs of relief.
“Better start covering up,” I hear a boy nearby say to his table and some “mhm” in agreement.
“Why do we gotta be the ones to cover up?” a girl says in response.
I look up, panicked. Most are talking among themselves, not looking at me anymore—their tone quick and dark and rising. The ones who are looking at me have fear in their eyes.
“I-I would never hurt any of you,” I say, but no one changes.
Li, her hand on my back this whole time, removes it. “Thank you, Chrys,” she says, just so I can hear. “Congratulations on finishing your first task. I’m afraid I’ll be going on a trip for a couple days, so when I return, I’ll give you your second task, okay?”
The voices are getting louder. People are starting to get up and bring their plates inside. I’m looking out at them, frozen.
“Okay?” Li says.
I nod dully.
“Good. Enjoy the rest of your night.” She gets down from the podium and takes her plate inside with the others at her table.
Is she kidding? Enjoy the rest of my night?
Hunter and Remington bring their plates and mine inside as I still stand there at the podium, unmoving. Most have gotten up and left now.
They come over
