‘No.’ Holly pulled a face. ‘She had one a few years ago, but they were always arguing so it didn’t last long. She’s too moody, always snapping people’s heads off for no reason.’
‘Is that what she’s like with you?’
‘A bit,’ Holly said quietly, sinking lower in her seat before taking another swig of wine.
‘It’s hard, isn’t it?’ Suzie said sympathetically. ‘Living with someone who’s moody, I mean. My mum’s bipolar, so I know exactly how it feels.’
‘What’s that?’ Holly asked.
‘It’s like a chemical imbalance in the brain,’ Suzie explained. ‘My mum used to have massive highs and do all sorts of crazy stuff, but then she’d crash and wouldn’t get out of bed for days on end. It was exhausting even when she was in a good mood, ’cos I was constantly on edge waiting for her to go on another downer.’
‘I don’t think my mum’s got that,’ Holly mused. ‘She doesn’t go up and down, she’s narky all the time.’
‘Does she flip out and kick the crap out of you?’
‘No.’
‘You’re lucky, then,’ said Suzie. ‘The last time my mum flipped, she battered me and I had to do a runner. And I was only fifteen, like you.’
‘Wow, I’d be well scared if I couldn’t go home,’ Holly said. ‘What did you do?’
‘My mate let me stay at hers for a few days,’ said Suzie. ‘But her mum found me hiding in her wardrobe when she was at school and kicked me out, so I had to go to my boyfriend’s. He was nineteen and I hadn’t been seeing him very long, so I didn’t really want to move in with him. But he promised he’d behave, and I believed him – more fool me.’
‘Why, what did he do?’
‘He got me drunk and tried to have sex with me, but I wasn’t as far gone as he thought and I slapped him. That’s when I got my first beating.’
‘First?’ Holly frowned.
‘Of many,’ Suzie said, sighing at the memory. ‘He always said he was sorry straight after and swore he’d never do it again. But that’s what they all say, isn’t it?’
‘Why didn’t you leave him?’
‘I had nowhere else to go.’ Suzie shrugged. ‘My mum didn’t want me, and I was terrified that the police would put me in care if I went to them, so I stayed with Hank till I was old enough to put my name down for a council flat.’
‘Hank?’ Holly snorted.
‘I know! Awful, isn’t it?’ Suzie grinned. ‘I used to call him Wank to wind him up when he was getting angry. I figured if he was going to beat me anyway, I might as well push him into it and get it over with. He was always nice to me straight after, but it never lasted long. All I’d have to do was put too much milk in his tea, or not enough salt on his chips, and he’d fly off the handle again.’
‘He sounds horrible,’ Holly said. ‘But if you’d already gone through that with him, why did you stay with Rob after he hit you?’
‘I’ve asked myself that same question a thousand times, and I honestly don’t know,’ Suzie replied. ‘There’s something about him that really gets to me. I can be mad as hell, but all he has to do is give me those puppy-dog eyes and that soppy smile of his and I fall to pieces.’
‘Would you take him back if he turned up?’ Holly asked.
Suzie pursed her lips and thought about it. Then, shrugging, she said, ‘Possibly. But he’d have to swear never to do anything like that again.’
‘Do you think you could ever trust him again?’
‘In time, maybe.’ Suzie sighed. ‘But enough about him.’ She glanced at her watch. ‘We need to crack on before it gets too late.’
She picked up her cigarettes, her glass and the bottle of wine, and walked out into the hall. But instead of heading up to the bedroom, as she had done the previous week, she opened a door beneath the stairs and switched a light on before descending a narrow flight of steps.
Holly followed her down into a small, low-ceilinged cellar. A clothes rail with a green sheet draped over it stood against the wall opposite the stairs, and a camera on a tripod was facing it. A free-standing light with a square hood attached to it stood in the centre of the room, and a laptop was sitting on a small table in the corner.
‘Ta-da!’ Suzie spread her hands. ‘Welcome to my studio.’
‘Did you do it all yourself?’ Holly asked, gazing around.
‘It’s pretty basic, so it wasn’t hard,’ Suzie said, switching the lamp on. ‘I’ll pimp it up when I’ve got more cash, but it’ll do for now. Anyway, go and sit on the sheet.’
‘Aren’t you going to do my make-up?’ Holly asked, still standing at the foot of the stairs, wine glass in hand.
‘No, I want to do some natural shots tonight,’ Suzie said. ‘Give myself a clean slate to play around with on Photoshop.’
‘OK,’ Holly murmured, dreading to think what her pasty, un-made-up face would look like on film. ‘You promise no one else is going to see them?’
‘Cross my heart,’ Suzie assured her. ‘Oh, and here . . . these are for you.’ She picked up a carrier bag and tossed it to Holly.
‘What is it?’ Holly asked, catching it.
‘Just some bras and knickers,’ Suzie said. ‘They’re a bit small for me, but they’re decent, so I didn’t want to throw them out. Don’t worry, they’re all clean, and some have still got tags on.’
‘Thanks.’ Holly smiled, excited by the thought of owning new underwear. It was over a year since her mum had last bought her a bra, and that had come from a charity shop, so it had already been well worn. She didn’t think she’d ever owned a brand-new one.
‘I was going to ask if you’d take some pictures of me when we’re finished with yours?’ Suzie said. ‘Nothing fancy, just a few test shots to
