Cheyenne circled a finger pointed at Mattie’s face, and the professor just blinked, almost expressionless. Her lips twitched briefly in an unformed grimace. “It’s not the same thing.”
“No shit. You look like Lady Gaga dressed you this morning, you had no idea what your class was supposed to be about, and you couldn’t control your magic. And now you’re avoiding me, of all people. I mean, I’m used to getting that from everyone else, but I figured we’ve both seen each other without the masks, so why does it matter so much all of a sudden?”
Mattie sucked in a sharp breath through her teeth. “That’s exactly why it matters. You’ve seen me. I’ve worked too hard for too long to let one poor decision on my part bring everything down around me.”
The drow halfling blinked. “You think it was a bad idea to show me what you are?”
“Well, in retrospect, yes.” The woman wouldn’t meet Cheyenne’s gaze.
“You do realize that I wouldn’t have gotten anywhere near as good at controlling the way I look if you hadn’t shown me it was possible, right? You helped me figure this stuff out, Mattie. I owe you that.”
“I was happy to help. Really. But you don’t owe me a thing.” The professor’s attempted smile looked more like she’d bitten into that moldy orange, and that scent was getting stronger, the longer they stood here butting heads like this.
“At least let me help.” Cheyenne shrugged and waited for a response. “Seriously, I’m not useless. I’m good at finding information if you’re trying to figure something out. I’ve gotten pretty good at using my magic the way I actually want it to work. For the most part. And it wouldn’t be the first time I helped another magical with a problem of their own. If you need—”
“I don’t need anything from a goddamn halfling who can’t leave well enough alone.” Mattie’s voice cracked through the office, and she let out another heavy exhale.
Now we’re getting somewhere. It was all Cheyenne could do not to break out in a smirk and gesture for the other woman to keep it coming.
Mattie lifted a finger and pointed it slowly at the drow halfling. “I warned you of the dangers, Cheyenne. I was very clear, and I really thought you were smart enough to take a warning like that at its full value. But apparently, I misjudged you. Either you thought I was lying or exaggerating about something I know personally—very well—or you’ve convinced yourself that the structures put in place for magicals on this side of the Border don’t apply to you. Whatever your reasoning, it’s reckless and inconsiderate of the consequences, and I refuse to paint a giant target on my back by letting it continue. No, I know I can’t stop you, but I can stop myself from getting dragged into this any further. You’re on your own with everything else, and we both know you’ll be just fine.”
“Wait!” Despite how hard she tried to keep it in, a small, strangled hiss of disbelieving laughter escaped Cheyenne. She shook her head and forced it back down. “This is just the same stuff as yesterday, isn’t it? Because I let it slip that I made contact with the FRoE?”
“There’s a big difference between ‘making contact’ and seeing who’s on their payroll. And I’m smart enough to put two and two together and say you had plenty of time to take a good look around.”
“Yeah, four days, actually. Four and a half.”
With an indignant huff, Mattie rolled her eyes.
“Hey, trust me, that was way too long for me, too. And I’m done with those—”
“You’re not done with the FRoE until they’re done with you, Cheyenne. That’s what you don’t understand. And those people being done with you means you’re dead, locked up, or sent back across the Border. In your case, shipped out for the first and last time, because you wouldn’t make it past the first night when you look like a human in your sleep, and some O’gúleesh gets fired up for a hate crime. Which isn’t considered a crime over there, by the way.” Mattie’s nostrils flared, and that sweaty-moldy-orange smell turned even more sour.
“Well, I’m done, okay?” The halfling spread her arms again, the chains on her wrists clinking. “And look. I’m still here.”
“Sure, for now. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that’s the case, but I will not let anyone else’s mistakes send me back there. Not even yours, halfling.” A dry, bitter chuckle escaped the woman. “Not after what I’ve seen and all the mistakes I’ve already made without anyone else’s help.”
Cheyenne cocked her head, frowning. “You think I’m a rat.”
Chapter Seventy-One
Mattie’s lashes fluttered in sporadic jerks, and a quickly pulsing vein was starting to stand out at her temple, mostly hidden by the loose curls of her black hair spilling over the ridiculous wrap she’d made of that bandana. “I think people do what’s necessary to survive. And that can change in an instant.”
The halfling nodded slowly and figured she might be able to squeeze a little more out of her professor before showing all her cards. “Was that what you did? Give someone up so you could make your way to this side without anyone else knowing?”
“That’s—” Professor Bergmann’s gaze darted across the old, trampled, stained carpet in her office before rising to meet Cheyenne’s eyes with the first ounce of conviction she’d shown all day. “I gave up a lot to be here. None of it included another magical or another life.”
“Good.” A small smile
