Frowning at her ability to pull herself from the depths, Powell handed Ellie a tissue and waited for her to wipe away the tiny beads of sweat that had appeared near her hairline. “You weren’t resistant to this before.”
She cast a glance at the closed door. “I felt like someone was coming for me. Like he was lurking outside the door.”
“You’re safe here, Ellie.”
“Am I?”
Powell blinked. “You’ve lost me.”
“Jones was dirty. Half a dozen people worked closely with him for decades and had no idea he was on the take? I find that hard to believe.”
He picked up his notepad again, scribbling what she’d said almost word for word. “They haven’t proven he was dirty yet, have they?”
Her expression turned mutinous. “I have all the proof I need.”
“That doesn’t sound very impartial.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Powerful men got away with murder and worse under his watch. We don’t need an exhaustive investigation to prove there was a connection between the cases he let slide and…” She stopped abruptly, rubbing a hand over her eyes. “Just trust me on this, okay? I know that he was dirty. He’s the one who moved Valerie Price to a new location, arranging her sale to another man when Arthur Fink exposed his own crimes online.”
“Miss Price will get her day in court.”
“If she lives long enough to tell her story.” Ellie rubbed her palms on her pants. “I need to go. Can we pick up where we left off tomorrow?”
“So soon?”
“I have to remember.”
“Of course.” He sat a little straighter in the chair. “Recovering your memories so you can work through the trauma you’ve endured has always been the goal, but why this sense of urgency?”
“I want to testify when Arthur Fink goes on trial.”
“You’re the arresting officer and the detective who discovered Arthur Fink’s crimes. Isn’t it a given that you’ll be testifying?”
“I mean as a victim. Not of Fink specifically, but of the criminals he and Jones are and were protecting. The video of my abduction was on that website, which means that the men involved in capturing and selling Valerie, and others like her, were also involved in what happened to me. Why should Valerie be the one to shoulder the burden of witness testimony alone? I need to remember so I can tell the court what those people did to me. If Arthur Fink comes through with the list of names to save his own skin, and I can recover enough memories to fill in the blanks, there’s a better chance of bringing this group to justice.”
“Or of making yourself a target.” He laced his voice with just enough of a warning tone to catch her attention.
“I’ve always been a target,” she retorted. “I’m not safe anywhere, so why hide when it comes to testifying?”
“Detective Kline, has anyone talked to you about being paranoid?”
She pulled back, scowling at Powell as if he were hurling an accusation instead of asking a question as a mental health professional. “It’s not paranoia if I’m right. You said yourself, there’s a thin line between reckless and determined, right?”
“But this is different. You’ve checked the door several times since you’ve been here, and you’ve all but accused the department at large of being dirty.”
“I don’t think everyone is dirty.” She threw up her hands, resting them on her temples for a second. “I never said that. But I do think Valerie will be safer if I’m the one to protect her until she’s able to testify.”
Powell’s eyebrows lifted in surprise, but he recovered quickly. “Can I offer a bit of advice?”
“You’re going to anyway, aren’t you?” she shot at him, her eyes throwing out green sparks.
He chuckled, giving himself a moment to think through his words. “That I am. You need to take a step back from this situation and take a long, hard look at where this is headed. You’ve taken on a lot of personal responsibility for Valerie and the other victims in the cold cases you’ve solved, and I believe it may be causing you to imagine situations are far worse than they are.” When she opened her mouth, he held up a hand. “I’m not saying that you’re not right about Jones. From what you’ve shared, it’s easy to believe that he was on the take. But I believe the stress you’ve endured recently is more than you realize. You’ve gone from investigating discrepancies and discovering a dirty detective to proclaiming that no one in your own department can be trusted.” He leaned forward as her eyes widened. “I hope you haven’t said as much to your colleagues.”
She shook her head. “Of course not.”
“Good. Perhaps now is a good time to remember why you became an officer and remind yourself that your reasons mirror that of many of your fellow officers. Most police officers are good, trustworthy civil servants who got into police work because they love their communities. You can trust them to bear some of your burden and share the duty to protect the innocent at all costs.”
“I can’t do it.” Ellie slowly shook her head. “Not with Valerie. She survived hell, almost died, and came out stronger when most of us would’ve broken. She deserves to live a long life filled with joy, and the only way I can ensure that happens is to protect her myself.”
He held eye contact with her for a long beat, realizing she was not going to give in on this. The kidnap victim within her wouldn’t allow it. He loved that strength.
“You can’t do it alone.”
Ellie lifted her chin. “I’m not compromising on this.”
Powell shrugged. “I can’t help you if you won’t at least consider what I’m saying. And by ignoring my advice, you’ll only be hurting yourself.”
“I hear you, and I know you mean well, but my answer is still
