MERCY:
I’m not going to tell on you, Mr.
Dickey. Dan.
DICKEY:
(very relieved) Good, I. . .well, that was inappropriate, last year, and I’m really sorry.
MERCY:
It was sinful. You’re a married man. You have a small child.
DICKEY:
I am. I only wish I could make amends to you, somehow.
MERCY:
You need to make amends with God.
DICKEY:
Yes! Yes. I’m a pretty religious person myself, actually. That would a fine solution. Shall we. . .pray together?
NARRATOR:
And once again, Mercy got on her knees in Mr. Dickey’s office. But this time so did he. They knelt together. Prayed. And, with Mercy’s prompting, Mr. Dickey indeed got right with God. Just after he got right with God, however, Mr. Dickey put his hands on Mercy. . .in an inappropriate manner. . .
MERCY:
You see, Mr. Dickey! You’ve slipped already.
DICKEY:
You’re so lovely. . .such an angel. . . (out of breath) Air. . .I need some air. . .
NARRATOR:
Mr. Dickey got to his feet and went to the window.
SOUND:
Window raises. Night sounds.
DICKEY:
I’m not a nice person, Mercy. I’m really not.
MERCY:
We’ll pray again. You will be right with God, Mr. Dickey. You will be.
NARRATOR:
So they prayed there at the window, in the crisp fresh air, until dusk turned into a starry evening. When their prayers had ceased, Mr. Dickey took her in his arms.
MR. DICKEY:
You’re a special young woman, Mercy. Very special.
NARRATOR:
There wasn’t much time. Mr. Dickey was faltering. Before he could slip from grace, Mercy gave him a firm but loving shove. . .and he slipped from the window. . .
SOUND:
Dickey screaming, then SPLATTING.
NARRATOR:
. . .to the hard cement three stories below.
MUSIC:
Up.
ANNOUNCER:
We’ll return to Fangoria’s Dreadtime Stories – after this.
ANNOUNCER:
And now back to Fangoria’s Dreadtime Stories and the conclusion to “Mercy.”
NARRATOR:
The tragic “suicide” of guidance counselor Dan Dickey attracted no more attention than the disappearance of Randy Johnson, who had after all been threatening to “blow this pop stand” for years. So Mercy became convinced of the righteousness of her calling. As fall turned into winter, Mercy saved a number of troubled souls from perdition. Take that spoiled rich kid, Peter Bishop, who took advantage of his parents being away to invite Mercy over to try out his new hot tub.
SOUND:
Jacuzzi bubbling.
PETER:
Ah, it feels good to be right with God, you sweet thing. . .so gooood. . .
NARRATOR:
The hot tub provided Mercy with the chance to perform her first Baptism. Peter was a dissipated youth, but holding him under would have been a problem. When the opportunity to wrap her legs around his neck presented itself, that problem disappeared along with Peter’s sins. . .
SOUND:
Jacuzzi bubbling. Splashing, growing more and more frantic.
PETER:
No, Mercy! No, Mercy! (gurgling)
SOUND:
Bubbling and splashing, then bubbling, then easy waves. Click of Jacuzzi motor shutting off.
NARRATOR:
With the buds of May displaying themselves in colorful profusion, Mercy went on a picnic with gifted nerd Oscar Pike, whose computer skills were for sale to his fellow students.
SOUND:
Outdoors, birds, breeze, maybe a distant dog bark; running water of a nearby stream.
OSCAR:
Yeah, Mercy, you wouldn’t believe how much dough I got stashed away, L.O.L. Selling porn site codes to tweens, fixing grades in the school’s data base. Man, there’s nothing I can’t do online.
MERCY:
But Oscar, you can’t get right with God with a few key strokes.
OSCAR:
(disappointed) I thought you’d be impressed. . .D.F.I.!
MERCY:
Oh, I am by your skills. Your mind. But intellectual values pale next to spiritual growth. I could never be with a boy who wasn’t one with the Lord.
OSCAR:
Well, uh. . .B.T.W., I’m willing to learn!
NARRATOR:
And there, in the cool shade of a magnificent oak, with a babbling brook nearby, sharing a picnic lunch on a checkered tablecloth with not even an ant to disturb them, she schooled Oscar in the ways of righteousness, and he confessed his many (though to Mercy somewhat boring) sins.
OSCAR:
So, uh. . .I’m free of sin now, right? Now maybe we could, W.T.F.,. . .I dunno know. . .
MERCY:
How about a skinny dip?
OSCAR:
O.M.G., yeah!
NARRATOR:
And soon, swimming under the sun as God had made them, they splashed and kissed and she rewarded him.
SOUND:
Splashing, frolicking.
OSCAR:
I can’t believe this! Woot! This is frickin’ great! R.M.S.! The most beautiful girl in school. . .the most beautiful girl anywhere. . .and she’s mine, all mine! Nailed it!
MERCY:
(having fun) How long can you stay under? I’ll time you. . .
OSCAR:
Okay! W.T.F.N.?
SOUND:
Oscar goes underwater with a big splash. Then sounds of struggle, splashing, gurgling, gurgling, gurgling.
OSCAR:
(underwater) W.T.F.! W.T.F.!
NARRATOR:
And performing this second Baptism was much easier. Mercy barely needed both hands holding Oscar under. . .and, after, when he floated on his belly like a fish without a loaf, he seemed so peaceful. He had left these earthly woes behind, on his laptop hard drive. He was in a better place.
SOUND:
School hallway, bell rings, kids bustling, as before.
CINDI:
Mercy! Hey, wait up.
MERCY:
(sincere) Hi, Cindi. You look nice today.
CINDI:
Yeah, well. . .look, I wanna make amends.
MERCY:
(hopeful) Oh?
CINDI:
I was wrong about you. I thought this I-found-hay-zeus thing was just an act. Something you put on to try to make people think you were sorry for what happened last fall.
MERCY:
I am sorry.
CINDI:
(no irony) Yeah, I think you are. I know we’ll never be friends, but I just wanted you to know. . .no hard feelings.
MERCY:
Bless you for that.
CINDI:
I mean, with all these deaths lately, it makes you think. Sorta. . .re-evaluate. It’s almost like God has it in for poor little Clarion.
MERCY:
No! God loves everyone here and everywhere.
CINDI:
Sometimes He has a funny way of showing it. I mean, first Peter Bishop. . .I mean he was an awful person, but. . .to get boozed up and fall asleep and drown in your own hot tub. Ewww. Then Oscar Pike goes swimming by himself, like he could swim, and the poor nerd drowns, too? It’s an epidemic! And our guidance counselor kills himself? What kind of way to guide impressionable young minds is that?
MERCY:
The Lord moves in mysterious ways.
CINDI:
No shit!
MERCY:
Cin –
