I found Lilian Grainger still living at the same address. She’s an extraordinary girl, quite different from me. Last night—on my very first evening here—I saw her sing at a jazz club. Can you imagine it, Eddie, me sipping cocktails and listening to jazz!
Lilian lives with her younger brother, James, and they were both very moved to receive the letter from Frank. They had some questions, of course, but thanked you for doing what you could to get the letter to them. It has given them some satisfaction to know something of how Frank died.
It is very early in the morning now. I am not sure what the day holds—I suppose getting to know my surroundings and discussing the terms of my accommodation with the Graingers. I am hoping I can stay for a while. They have been very kind so far.
I want you to know that I am thinking about you and missing you, in every moment. It’s as though you are here with me, Eddie.
I will write again very soon. Do take care of yourself until then.
I love you, Eddie.
Your sister,
Evie
Evelyn smiled. Writing to Eddie was the easiest of all the letters. She knew he’d be happy for her, and pleased that he had been able to help her. To remind him how much she loved him was important, since she could not be there for him in person. The letter to her parents was much harder.
Dear Mother and Father,
You will by now have, of course, realised that I am not there. I hope Edward was able to pass my short letter to you, written in the hope that you would not worry. I am sorry for any anger or concern I have caused you. It was not my intention to hurt you at all, although I am perfectly aware that my actions will appear reckless and inconsiderate.
I will not attempt to explain myself because I am not sure I entirely understand it myself. When Edward managed to gather himself to show me the letter he had been keeping, for a friend of his captain, who lived in London, it seemed the most natural thing to offer to deliver it. I am aware that I could have arranged for it to be posted, or sought another solution, but it is apparent to me that I wanted to see London and it seemed of utmost urgency to set out at once.
There will be time for reproach when I return and I fully expect to bear the weight of your disappointment and anger. But I hope you will also understand that I have taken these actions in the pursuit of happiness.
The purpose of this letter is to let you know that I am perfectly safe. I am only a short train ride away from you. I have been accommodated by a brother and sister, Lilian and James Grainger, in Mayfair, so I am quite comfortable. I urge you not to worry for me. I will stay in touch.
With hopes of your eventual forgiveness,
Your loving daughter,
Evie
The idea of causing her parents pain or making them the subject of town gossip tore at her insides. She would have done neither intentionally and yet that was exactly what she had done, through making a choice that was entirely her responsibility. However, there was no going back now, so she could only hope they would be reconciled to her when the time came to return home.
She had two more letters to write. One to her sister and one to Michael. She began with a short note for Annie. She apologised, attempted the briefest of explanations, and entreated her sister to watch over Edward in her absence. Annie might not share the special relationship she had with Edward, but she did care.
Sealing the letter in its envelope, Evelyn stood up and walked over to the window. They sky was growing light; day had nearly arrived. She yawned and stretched her arms, ready to embrace a full day in London and see what it brought her. The prospect made her letter to Michael seem almost inconsequential. She’d already left him a note, and after all, the pain had already been caused. There was really nothing to say, so she simply assured him of her well-being and apologised for causing him pain. She added a hope that he would soon find a woman to love him as he deserved, to make sure there was no danger he would wait for her. Wherever the next weeks led, it would not be back to Michael. She signed off with affection and then it was done. She felt no regret, other than that she had hurt a good man, and thus knew her decision to be correct. He would move on and so would she, into a much brighter future.
Evelyn slid the final letter into its envelope and returned to the window. It was now quite light, with the haze of dawn. The buildings, though made of brick, still appeared grey and ghostly. There was movement in the street now. An old horse barrow made its way slowly along the street and a man in a smart suit walked briskly along the pavement. In the opposite direction, a couple in long coats walked past, arm in arm. There was sufficient light to make out the mottled damp on the flagstones of the pavement. London was coming alive. Despite the pain of writing her letters home, Evelyn felt a thrill at the thought of it.
*
