The Devil's Confession

day. As if to confirm this, he said, “27 years we were together, Harry. And they were the happiest of my life.” I could hear his voice break a little and began to feel sorry for him.

“I’m sorry for your loss,” I offered, unsure of whether my words would make a difference. I doubt he even heard them, continuing his own conversation. Although his next question took me by complete surprise. I didn’t expect it, coming at me with such speed, it caught me off guard.

“How did my sister die, Harry? Did she suffer?” I shuffled uncomfortably, feeling my cheeks flush. “I know he killed her. Of that I have no doubt. I just want to know whether that prick made her suffer. Can you tell me that at least?”

He suddenly turned in his chair, looking down at me with eyes that bore right into my brain. I think I felt Eddie move a little, as if his gaze had penetrated my brother’s being somehow. I opened my mouth to speak, but wasn’t sure of the words that were supposed to come out. When none did, I snapped it shut again.

“Guess it don’t really matter. It’s been years and now he’s gone as well. Hopefully he met his own fate. Hopefully that bastard is lying dead in some hole. I hope the last thing that went through his mind was my beautiful sister smiling down at him from heaven, as his fat sorry arse dropped into hell.”

“She didn’t suffer,” I suddenly said. I still don’t know to this day why I told him. Something about that moment just made it right. “It was the morning of my 6^th or 7^th birthday. 6^th, I think. My father had been drinking and he went upstairs to do his thing with her. When he was done, they came out of their room and,” I paused, reliving the moment in my own mind.

‘Don’t say it,” Eddie suddenly said.

“I’m sorry, I have to, Ed,” I replied. Mick looked at me in surprise, but I doubt he understood what I meant. I turned to him and continued. “I don’t quite remember what he told her to do, but I do remember her telling him no. She refused to do what he wanted and for that, he punched her in the face. My mum fell down the stairs and I think she broke her neck on the way down.”

I looked up at him and found his gaze staring over my shoulder. I think he was grateful in some way to finally learn the truth about his sister. It gave him the kind of closure he needed. I thought that would be all the questions answered, but when he asked his next, wasn’t sure whether he was hinting at something more.

“Harry? Can I ask you another question?” I looked up at him, trying to decide whether this line of conversation would deceive me in some way. I slowly nodded, sure that he would ask where she was buried. Instead, he surprised me a second time. “Do you know where your father is?”

For a moment, I was positive he knew what I’d done. I was also sure he would call the police and turn me in. They would interrogate me until I spilt my guts, telling them about my father, Royce and the old whore. They would rush to my home, go to the spot where I buried them and dig the corpses up. They would then hang me from the nearest tree, executing me for the evil shit I did.

“No,” I lied. He looked at me for a moment longer, then slowly nodded his head. I think he knew I was lying. I think he knew that I killed him and that’s why he nodded. He didn’t need to hear the words from me. My eyes deceived me enough to tell the truth themselves and he knew how to read them.

“This farm will be yours one day, you know. You’re the only one that’s left. Please take care of it for me. And when my time finally comes, may I ask a single favour?” I nodded again, wondering whether he saw more in my eyes than I wanted to share.

“Yes,” I replied quietly.

“When my time comes, will you bury me next to my beloved Jeanie? Will you allow me to rest next to her for eternity?”.

11.

I don’t know why, but the rest of the chat we had after that request felt forced, like there was nothing else to discuss. Although Uncle Mick asked about my schooling, any friends I had and about my work at the mill, the questions didn’t feel like he was interested in the answers I gave. He felt more and more distant and by the time I rose to my feet, simply waved at me as I bid him a goodnight.

The sun had sunk below the distant horizon an hour before and as I began to climb the hill towards the homestead, watched a bright full moon slowly rise over the hill I was climbing. It felt biblical watching as it rose before me, like a giant lamp illuminating the path before me.

I turned one final time as I reached the crest, but Uncle Mick was hidden in the shadows of the willow. I continued past the house towards my own small shack, situated on the other side of the hill. There was enough distance between the buildings and as I dropped onto the bed with a thud a few minutes later, felt the relief of finally telling another soul about my unfortunate mother. Although her death had been held deep inside the darkest cellar of my mind for more than a decade, it was remarkably soothing to share it with him. It was as if her soul had finally been allowed to fly free from within the prison where I was forced to hide it.

12.

“Harry, wake up,” a voice cried to me, the tone reaching into my dream. It was still dark as