I was still trying to form the words when I sensed he was not listening.
‘We were laughing about the baby only yesterday. She thought he was going to do well, arriving on One Flint Knife – that’s not a bad day to be born, is it? But in the end, he missed it.’
I glanced at the sweat bath, but although I thought I heard muffled voices from that direction it was impossible to tell what was happening in there. I wondered what had gone wrong. Then I dismissed the thought, telling myself that it was beyond mending and was none of my business. I had come here to find out what, if anything, Handy knew about the captain’s movements, and to warn him of the possible danger to himself. Then I wanted to be off straight away. I felt exposed here, in the parishes in the south of the city where I presumed the otomi would be looking for me. The sooner I was at Lily’s house, even if it was only temporarily while we figured out what to do next, the happier I would be.
But then Handy said: ‘Do you know the custom? What we have to do, if… when a woman dies giving birth?’
‘Handy, I’ll come to the point. Lord Feathered in Black… The custom? What do you mean?’
‘I mean what we have to do with the body.’
I frowned. ‘Well, yes, I mean I know what you’re supposed to do, in theory at least, but…’
‘Only, we’re going to need your help.’
‘What do you mean, help? Help with what… Oh, no!’ It suddenly dawned on me what he was going to ask me and the thought of what that ritual would involve filled me with horror. ‘No, look. I’m just passing through, you know. I only wanted to deliver a message…’
‘Only I don’t know whether I can get enough men together right now, at short notice, and as you know we need four for the burial.’
‘I’d like to be there,’ I said insincerely. ‘But I’m very busy just now, and my time isn’t my own, you know – did you hear Lily bought me? As I was saying, when we were in Tetzcoco…’ I made as if to stand up, but only managed an awkward half crouch.
Suddenly Handy became, just for a moment, his old self. ‘What are you talking about?’ he growled irritably. ‘My wife’s dead in the sweat bath and you come barging in, like you were a neighbour come to borrow a pot of honey, spouting some bloody nonsense about Tetzcoco – who do you think you are, anyway?’
‘That’s not fair,’ I said, taken aback by the outburst. ‘I didn’t know what was happening – how could I? I only wanted to give you a warning – and if this is all the thanks I’m going to get, I won’t bother!’
The man suddenly let out a groan, and passed a hand in front of his eyes as if he were brushing away a cobweb. ‘Yaotl, please,’ he continued, in a voice suddenly small and hoarse, ‘I’m sorry, it’s just that… It’s the shock, you know? I can’t believe she’s gone, and now there are these things I have to do, and I can’t do them by myself.’
‘I know,’ I said, sympathetically.
For some reason I could not quite bring myself to get up and walk out. I glanced longingly over my shoulder at the doorway that led through the front room of the house to the street, to freedom and peace of mind, but I could not get there because my feet seemed to have glued themselves to the ground.
I made one more effort to talk my way out of this. ‘Look, I’ll come back later – in a few days, maybe. And if there’s ever anything I can do…’
‘There is. I told you, we need help with the burial. Her sister’s washing her now. She’ll be ready before nightfall.’
‘I meant anything apart from that,’ I muttered.
‘Yaotl, I’m just asking you to do one thing. Just one. If you won’t do it for me, can’t you do it for Star?’
And then out of the sweat bath came Handy’s sister-in-law, accompanied by her mother and the midwife. Gentle Heart was carrying the bowl Goose had taken in with her, but it was covered with a crumpled skirt and blouse.
The women were not weeping, but dark tracks stained both their cheeks. ‘We’ve cleaned her and put a new skirt and shift on her,’ Goose said quietly. ‘Gentle Heart says she has to stay in there, alone, until nightfall. Then you have to bury her.’
‘Yaotl will help,’ Handy said quickly.
Goose gave me a weak smile. ‘Yaotl, thank you. Star would have appreciated that.’
‘Don’t mention it.’ I sat down heavily. I looked at the ground, not out of modesty, but so that I could swear silently without any of them noticing.
‘I’ll be back at sunset,’ the midwife said. She put her bowl down by the doorway. She seemed to hesitate then, as though there were something she wanted to say. Star’s mother went inside the house to look for her husband.
After a long, uncomfortable silence, Goose and the midwife both spoke at once.
‘Look, Gentle Heart, you mustn’t blame…’
‘I tried to save them both! Believe me, I did all I could! If only…’ Whatever else the woman had been about to say dissolved into a long, desolate howl. She turned and stumbled away from us, finishing up leaning against the courtyard wall with her face buried in her arms.
Goose darted towards her while Handy’s eyes, wide with horror, followed them both.
‘Listen to me…’ Goose was pleading with the distraught midwife, shaking her by the elbow to get her attention. Eventually Gentle Heart turned, slumped against the wall with her back to it and lifted her glistening face to the sky.
‘Why?’ The words were whispered
