but the people of the kingdom, scenting a mystery, insisted on knowing in detail what had happened the other two heroes. So the rumor began to spread that Log himself had done away with them in order that he might gather to himself all the glory of the undertaking.
I guess maybe everybody didn’t love Log.
The king was forced at last to send for him again and to demand a full account of everything.
Log realized that his end was near. He met it bravely. Commending to the king’s protection his lovely princess, Log related how the three mighty serpents whom they had killed were sons of Suyettar, and how in revenge Suyettar had succeeded in destroying Three Bottles and Six Bottles together with their brides. Then he told the fate about to overtake himself.
Oh god, it really is Old Yeller! “He’s my log, ma. I’ll do it.”
He finished speaking and as the king and the court looked at him, to their amazement he disappeared.
Log, nooo!
“To the cemetery!” someone cried.
They all went to the cemetery where at once they found a fresh blue cross that had come there nobody knew how. There it stands to this day, a reminder of the life and deeds of the mighty hero Log.
*sniffle* I hope they put up a nice plaque, the jerks.
The king was overcome with sorrow at losing such a hero. He took Log’s bride under his protection and he found her so beautiful and so gentle that soon he fell in love with her and married her.
Ah … huh. How nice for her. I’m sure that wasn’t awkward at all.
Well. It was no twenty-four-headed-otter tale, perhaps, but if you had told me that the most sympathetic hero we’d find in a long time was a piece of sentient firewood, I … would probably have believed you, actually. But still. Nooo! Log! We hardly knew ye!
Clearly Log needs to be resurrected in fanfic. Dr. Who crossover, maybe. My Little Log. Team Log! LOGS DO NOT SPARKLE. THEY ARE TOO MANLY TO SPARKLE AND ALSO THEY ARE LOGS.
… still kinda weirded out by the head-scratching thing, though.
Tatterhood
I’ll be honest with you — I love this one. It’s very short compared to some of the drawn-out sagas we’ve seen and never once devolves into “East of the Sun, West of the Moon,” which is sort of the go-to fairy tale for dragging things out. So this’ll be a quick little afternoon amusement instead of a lengthy epic. Still!
It’s also one of the very, very, few fairy tales that has a kick ass female hero who isn’t just there in an advisory capacity. (Seriously, why was the Master-maid not just killing everything in her path? Why did she even need the prince around?)
I do rather resent the ending, though.
A little digging turns up that this is Aarne-Thompson type 711, “Beautiful and Ugly Twin.” Apparently this is common in Norway and doesn’t come up much elsewhere. Go figure.
This is from Popular Tales from the Norse translated by George Webb Dasent (New York: G. P. Putnam Sons, 1908).
ONCE upon a time there was a king and a queen who had no children, and that made the queen very sad. She seldom had a happy hour. She was always crying and complaining, and saying how dull and lonesome it was in the palace. “If we had children there would be life enough,” she said. Wherever she went in all her realm she found God’s blessing in children, even in the poorest hut. And wherever she went she heard women scolding their children, and saying how they had done this and that wrong. The queen heard all this, and thought it would be so nice to do as other women did.
We only have the kids on alternate weeks, and let me tell you that the scolding bit is about as much fun as chewing your leg off in a bear trap. Seriously, why are there dirty socks on the windowsill? Seriously? Again?
At last the king and queen took into their palace an adopted girl to raise, that they might always have her with them, to love her if she did well, and scold her if she did wrong, like their own child.
Ironically, she will vanish without a trace one paragraph from now.
One day the little girl whom they had taken as their own, ran down into the palace yard, and was playing with a golden apple. Just then an old beggar woman came by, who had a little girl with her, and it wasn’t long before the little girl and the beggar’s child were great friends, and began to play together, and to toss the golden apple about between them. When the queen saw this, as she sat at a window in the palace, she tapped on the pane for her foster daughter to come up. She went at once, but the beggar girl went up too; and as they went into the queen’s apartment, each held the other by the hand. Then the queen began to scold the little lady, and to say, “You ought to be above running about and playing with a tattered beggar’s brat.” And she started to drive the girl down the stairs.
The queen is setting herself up for one of those classic fairy tale comeuppances here. Always be polite to beggars and always follow directions.
Also, I hope you enjoyed the adopted girl because we will never hear from her again.
“If the queen only knew my mother’s power, she’d not drive me out,” said the little girl; and when the queen asked what she meant more plainly, she told her how her mother could get her children if she chose. The queen wouldn’t believe it, but the girl insisted, and said that every word of it was true, and asked the queen only to try and make her mother do it. So the queen sent the girl down to
