I finally formulated my shock into words. “I-I don’t even know you.”
I winced. Great word choices.
“Touch is heightened for Fae. I can imagine that it would be a shock to your body.”
“Is this like the hormonal thing Rian said all Fae go through when transitioning?”
“Not even close.”
Great.
I finally felt strong enough to move off him. I looked down at my hands. What was becoming of me?
Ty’s large hand settled over mine, wrapping them with his. I wanted to pull away, but the gentle touch… it felt so good. Ty looked uncomfortable as he scooted closer. I felt the heat from his body, and I squeezed his hand so I wouldn’t think to jump on him again.
“I know you don’t know me well, but I can help with the frustration you’re feeling.”
It took me a second to process what he was saying.
“Are you proposing you relieve my… ache?” I laid on the sarcasm.
“Yes,” he said frankly.
I was not expecting that.
Tyran had just propositioned we become fuck buddies. Warring emotions swirled inside me. And I was more shocked by the interest. We’d met moments ago and then this? I rubbed my forehead.
Now that I was in my right mind and not hazy from a disconcerting sexual drive, I scooted away from him. As sad as it made me, all I could think about was Roark. I wanted him, but I could never have him.
Would it be such a bad thing to give in to touch when all I’d been shown was betrayal? It wasn’t like it would mean anything, and I would make that very clear. I was too damaged, too hurt, to offer anyone more.
Plus, I’d been holding off for so long, always wanting it to be special, but I was beginning to think those expectations were too high. I’d been fooling myself. There was never going to be perfect anything, at least not for me. Roark showed me that. Hell, even Jeff showed me.
“Think about it. I’ll not reject you if you have a change of opinion,” he said. At the phrasing, I narrowed my eyes. “And not because you are the Queen.”
I took him in and said nothing. Tyran had been nothing but friendly and even funny with his dry quips I wasn’t sure were serious half the time. Maybe if I got to know him more, it would be a decision that would come easier.
“So, you never explained what you did earlier.” I quirked an eyebrow and stood. When I reached a hand down, he grasped it, and I pulled him up. The warmth was comforting, and I knew I’d be looking for ways to touch him if only for the sensation on my overly sensitive skin. I yanked my hand from his, freaked out by my need. It occurred to me that he felt warm now when, before, touching a Fae was cold.
“I didn’t want to use my abilities, but to train you properly, I will have to.” Thankfully, he ignored my odd behavior.
“A warning would have been nice.”
“There was no time. You were about to lose control.” At my glacier look, he smiled sheepishly. “Tomorrow we can pick up where we left off.”
This had to get done. Like a needle popping a balloon, anger flowed out of me. It took me a second to realize the unnatural way irritation left me. I glared up at him. He shrugged and didn’t meet my eyes.
“I have a small reserve of magic built up. I don’t want you to suffer.” It was an intangible feeling, but his hold on my emotion incrementally lessen until I knew what I was feeling was mine.
“Please don’t use your… ability on me again.” When he opened his mouth, I added, “Except when we’re training.”
He conceded and reached his hand out for mine. I looked down at his open palm, the strange desire overtaking me.
“It’ll mean nothing, I promise. I just—” Tyran cleared his throat. “I know how it is to crave the comfort of touch.”
Flicking my gaze away from his knowing ones, I let out a decided breath and grasped his hand. Warmth suffused my hand. Squeezing my eyes shut, I let myself enjoy the surface comfort. I hadn’t realized I needed something as simple as having my hand held.
“I’ll take you to Cora. She can give you a tour of the grounds.”
I walked slightly behind him, still grasping his hand like a lifeline. “What do you call your ability?”
Ty slowed his steps, so they matched my slower ones. “Mine is a mental-based ability, with roots pertaining to emotion. I can enhance anything you feel. I’ll eventually teach you how to ward yourself from mental influences by throwing up blocks. It’s basic visualization.”
I stayed quiet as he explained the importance of protecting oneself from mental attacks, but I was thoroughly checked out at that point. It occurred to me that he could use his ability to make me feel anything. Could replace this gaping hole in my chest… It wasn’t the thought that he was capable of it that freaked me out. It was that I was considering asking him to use it on me.
8
Weeks later, I’d figured out the precise amount of magic to dip into so I didn’t implode. Another plus? I was learning how to have a constant grasp on it. It was like gripping a pencil. I had to learn the perfect way to hold it, and if I dropped that pencil, my fingers went numb, or I broke it—I lose control. That balance was key to everything I did. I’d barely managed to keep it sunny for a minute, but the constant sleeting and snowing had stopped.
Other than training, I also spent a lot of time sleeping. Like, an abnormal amount. I was fully ignoring the fact that I’d been in a depressive funk. It didn’t help that Annie refused to leave my brain. What was she doing? Was she okay? It had already been longer than what I expected it to be. I was planning
