They all nodded and drew their weapons. They had youth on their side, but Cam was stronger and better trained. Soon Rufus dropped away and then Paul. Liam put up a good show. He was a strategist, and he’d grown in the last months. But eventually Cam deflected a lunge and forced the sword from his hand. Heaving in air, Liam lifted his head as Cam rested his sword tip at the lad’s throat.
“We continue,” he commanded, and everyone lined up again to go through the motions. Another hour, and another, as the noonday sun crested and slipped past its peak.
It was a warm September day and the men were drenched in sweat and growing weak, but still Cam pushed, even knowing he was dancing on the edge of sanity. The sun was moving toward the horizon, and they’d had no food or drink the entire day.
He sparred with Liam again, and the lad stumbled and reached out, raising his sword. The steel wavered, and the boy collapsed in the dirt, his pale blond hair soaked.
“Liam? Lad? Get up.” Cam knelt beside him and touched his pale, clammy face, feeling his heart pounding. “Bloody hell.” His skin was far too hot. He hefted the boy to his shoulders and headed for the loch. “We’re done for the day. Go rest and get something to drink.”
In the nearest shady spot he submersed Liam, making sure to keep his head above the water. When he finally woke, Cam handed over a flask of ale and sat with him as he sipped it.
“I’m sorry for my weakness,” Liam said while resting his head on his knees. “I can’t believe I disgraced myself in front of all the men.”
His color was better, but Cam wanted to make sure he was well. “Nay. It wasna you who was the disgrace, but me. A warrior is only as strong as his body, and I didn’t take care of yours. I’m sorry, lad, truly.”
“You want us to be fierce, as would any war chief.”
“Aye, but there’s being fierce and there’s being foolish. I’ve been something far worse than foolish.”
“What’s that?” Liam asked.
“Desperate.”
Liam nodded, not needing any explanation. “You want to protect Lady Mari.”
“Yes. Very much so.”
“I understand. I’m in love, as well. And I’d do anything to keep her safe.”
Cam gave him an indulgent smile. “I’m not in love, but Mari is my wife, and it’s my duty to protect her.”
Liam’s brows pulled together. “Ye don’t love her? I was sure you did. The way the two of you are always sneaking off to your room and the woods…”
Cam chuckled. “That’s lust. I’ve got that aplenty. But I also have a responsibility to keep her safe. I don’t want anything to happen to her.”
Liam nodded. “I understand. I feel the same. Even if I only met her after she’d already been injured.”
“The Stewart lass?”
“Aye. Evelyn.” Liam’s eyes got all dreamy in that way love made men lose their wits.
Cam wouldn’t fall into that trap. “I want to protect my wife. But I’ll not lose ye to do it. That was wrong. I won’t let it happen again.”
“I’d give my life to protect her, and be glad for the honor,” the boy said, causing Cam’s guts to turn.
He should have been pleased to hear the young warrior’s vow of fealty. He should have clapped the lad on the shoulder and told him he was a brave man. But it didn’t ring true. Giving one’s life for another was an honorable thing. But what was one life saved if another was lost?
What made Mari’s life more valuable than Liam’s, or the rest of his men? For it was clear it would not be just one man to fall in protection of Mari when they faced the English, but many. Could he ask a warrior with a wife and children at home to give his life so that Cam could save his own wife?
“Go to the kitchens and tell Millie I said to give you some salted meat. It helps. And don’t let any of the men shame you for falling over. Go on.”
Liam nodded and headed for the castle. Cam watched him to make sure he was well enough to walk, then turned to watch the water lap against the rocks. He didn’t need to look toward the sound of footsteps to know who soon approached him.
“If you’ve come to scold me for being too harsh on my men, I already know what an arse I am.”
Lach sat next to him. “Your men? I thought they were my men.”
Cam smiled and nodded, acknowledging the slip. “Whoever’s men they are, they’ll be far more impressive if I don’t wear them down to naught but bones.”
“I don’t think fighting is going to get her out of this.” Lach kept his gaze on the water, too.
Cam knew his cousin well enough to understand he did not mean they should surrender.
“You think Mari and I should run, then.”
Lach nodded. “We have ties to the Campbell clan through our mothers. Bryce is also a Campbell. Or perhaps it would be safer to leave Scotland altogether. Mayhap France?”
Cam swallowed back a refusal to leave his homeland. While it wasn’t the best option, he knew he would do it if it meant protecting Mari as well as his clan.
“Wherever ye decide to go, you’ll not speak of it with any of us. Afterward, there should be no letters or contact at all. Nothing that can tie you back to the clan. Don’t even tell Mari until you’re on your way. She’ll tell Kenna, and Kenna will want to check on her sister.”
Cam nodded, already feeling the chill of the self-imposed exile. “I agree. I’ll make the necessary arrangements.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Mari’s nightmares continued and grew even worse. Cam hated feeling helpless and wanted to help. But he didn’t think she’d shared all her fears. She was
