Shit, of course he’s right. About everything. And he probably thinks I’m skipping out to have sex at her place. I didn’t even tell him I was planning a jet-set marathon trip to Vegas. He’d probably punch me in the face for even suggesting it.
“I know, man, okay? Just let me call her quick.”
“Yeah. You do that.” He shakes his head. “You know, for being so smart, you’re kind of an idiot sometimes,” he mutters.
I loop my bag over my shoulder and duck out of the weight room as my call rings unanswered. “Come on. Pick up,” I mumble, while making my way toward the training rooms. Of course she’s busy. I don’t know what’s involved with getting ready for her shows, but I’m guessing it takes a lot to turn her from the stripped-down girl I saw in her studio last night to the sculpted statue on display for the masses. I grunt in frustration when her voicemail picks up. I really wanted to talk to her, to hear her voice, for her to hear mine. I can’t fathom having this linger on voicemail and hang over my head all night. Breaking a promise is bad enough, let alone like this, but what choice do I have?
“Hey, babe, it’s Oliver. I hate that I have to do this, but there’s no way I’m going to be able to make it to Vegas tonight. Rehab went well, but it took everything out of me and they need me to stay and do some recovery stuff. I’m so sorry and will make it up to you, I promise. I really wanted to see you perform. We’ll make sure that happens soon. Kill it tonight. Remember, you’re a badass. Call me as soon as you can.”
I message Hadley next, like they said to do with any logistical issues. I’m just tucking my phone back in my bag, when it rings. My heart races as I pull it up again, but my excitement dims when I see it’s Hadley, not Genevieve.
“Hey, Hadley,” I say. “Guessing you saw my message.”
“Yeah. Crap. You’re not coming?”
“I know. I’m sorry. I left a message for Gen, too. She didn’t answer.”
“No, I have her phone. She doesn’t like being distracted prior to a show. Especially lately, with her confidence so rocked.”
Shit. Now I really feel like garbage. “I get that, but can you ask her to call me? I want to tell her in person.”
Hadley hesitates, and my pulse pounds in the silence.
“I’m not sure that’s a great idea, Oliver. She’s been having a rough day. The only thing keeping her afloat is knowing you’re going to be here tonight. She’s so excited for you to see her perform and be with her backstage. It’s all she talks about. She’s told everyone you’re coming.”
Fuck! My fist clenches around the phone as I shove my other palm against the wall.
“Well, I have to tell her. I can’t just not show.”
“No, of course. I just mean, maybe it’s better for her to get your message after the show. She’ll know at that point that you tried to call before but at least it won’t mess with her head for the performance. Plus, her mom’s here, and you know how she feels about you. You really want to give her that ammo? Gah! This is really bad timing, Oliver.”
“I know. I’m sorry. Shit!” I bang the wall again and rest my forehead against it. For a fleeting second, I consider risking everything to get there. It would be brutal, and I’d have a ton of fallout to deal with, but the prospect of disappointing Genevieve, of not being there to protect and support her when she needs me, rips a gaping hole in my gut. Phantom pain spreads through my knee, and I clench my jaw against the fresh burn.
“Hang on,” Hadley says after a pause. “You’re totally right. She should know now. I’ll get her.”
I breathe a sigh of relief and agony. I hate this so much. Hate my stupid, weak body that never seems able to do what I need it to do anymore.
“Hey, Oliver!” comes Genevieve’s chipper voice a minute later. “You on your way?”
I close my eyes and squeeze my fist at my side. “Hey, Gen. Look, that’s why I’m calling. There is nothing I want more than to be there for you tonight. I absolutely can’t wait to see you perform, but today didn’t go like I thought it would. I still have a few hours left of training. There’s no way they’re going to let me go. I wasn’t thinking clearly when I thought I could make that trip work.”
Silence.
“Gen?”
Silence.
“You still there?”
“Oh. Okay,” she leaks out finally. “I mean, are you okay? Your knee?” There’s a quiver in her voice that breaks my heart.
“Yeah, I’m fine, just wrecked. We have some stuff to do to help me recover. I can’t afford to put any more stress on my body right now.”
“No. Right. Of course.” Her words are choppy, like she’s trying to release them carefully. God, this is heartbreaking. She’s fighting to be strong. I hear it, sense it through the phone.
“Gen? You got this. You know that? You don’t need me. You don’t need anyone. You just need you and your badass self to go out there and be amazing.”
She sniffs. I want to reach through the phone and hold her. “Yeah. I have to go. Thanks for letting me know. Take care of yourself.”
“Gen…”
“Bye, Oliver.”
And the line goes dead.
I push my fist back into the wall with another curse. Furious, heartbroken, helpless—so damn helpless.
“Fuck!” I cry out into the hallway, leaning over and resting my palms on my thighs.
Good luck to the trainers getting me to relax tonight.
CHAPTER 14
I’ve left a little piece of my heart in your hand
Do you see it?
Do you feel it?
Did you lose it so soon when you stepped away?
It’s okay, here’s another
And another
And countless more to uncover
For no matter what you
