“Exhausted, but it’s only nine o’clock and my sleep pattern’s all over the place. I thought if I watched a movie and then went to bed, it might help me to adjust to the time zone.”
Emmy and Black had disappeared, along with Dan. Emmy had muttered something about a conference call, but whether that was just an excuse for some alone time with Black, Alaric wasn’t sure.
“What movie are you watching?”
If his ex was doing her husband upstairs, Alaric didn’t want to overhear, and the walls in the rented house weren’t particularly soundproof. He knew that because Beth had been singing to herself in the shower this morning, and he’d heard every word. She could really hold a tune.
“I don’t know yet.”
“Mind if I join you?”
“I just said I don’t know what I’m watching.”
“Doesn’t matter. I’m not ready to go to bed yet either.”
Alaric left his unfinished glass of wine on the table. It had been a while since he was alone with Beth, and already he could feel the tension building. But he was a glutton for punishment, and when she shifted to the side and patted the seat next to her, of course he took it.
“There’s so much on TV,” she said, flipping through the myriad of channels. “By the time I find anything good, I’ll be too shattered to watch it.”
“Then let’s talk instead. How did it go at the ranch today?”
“Is this your attempt at employee relations?” she teased.
“Something like that.”
Fuck, every time he closed his eyes, she was back in his arms at that party. The party where he’d taken things way too far and made her come in front of her ex-husband. Although really, the ex had been an excuse. Alaric should have stopped before he got her off, but the asshole inside him had wanted to see her O-face, and he hadn’t paused to consider the ramifications.
Actions have consequences, son.
His father’s words echoed in his head, the culmination of a heated argument over Alaric’s steadfast denial of the charges levelled at him. When he’d refused to admit to stealing the Emerald pay-off, his father had disowned him.
Everyone makes mistakes, son. A man owns up and takes his punishment. Only a coward ducks the blame.
Bancroft McLain would rather have seen Alaric in prison than be branded the father of a weakling. Didn’t he realise that all the put-downs, the constant criticism and the bullying, they’d only made Alaric stronger?
Don’t you walk away from me, boy!
He hadn’t walked, he’d run.
He’d punished Emmy for something that wasn’t her fault, and he’d done a hatchet job on his own heart in the process. Never again would he put himself in a position where he could hurt another woman like that.
Which meant keeping his relationship with Beth on a professional footing. He cared about her too much to play with her emotions.
“The ranch was fun,” she said. “Harriet and Stéphane are both lovely, Dan’s friendly and so, so smart, and it was wonderful being around the horses all day. And Barkley—she’s such a sweet dog.”
And yet Beth didn’t sound happy.
“But…?”
“But what?”
“You don’t sound as if you had a great time.”
“No, I did. Honestly. It’s just… I guess…”
“You guess what?” Alaric pressed.
“I guess I feel guilty about that.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m meant to be working. You’re paying me, and I was messing around with horses.”
“And work can’t be fun?”
“Well, historically it hasn’t been.”
“There’s an old saying that goes ‘find a job you enjoy, and you’ll never do a day’s work in your life.’”
“I always thought that was a myth.
“Sirius has its moments—you already got thrown in at the deep end last week—but when we started the firm, we all agreed that our priority was to have a good work/life balance. Without going into the details—the other guys’ stories are theirs to tell, not mine—the four of us have been through enough shit with work that we don’t want to go down that road again. Sirius is profitable, and we each make enough money to be comfortable. I’m never going to be a billionaire like Black, but nor do I want to be. I just want to be happy.” Alaric smoothed the hair away from Beth’s face. “And I want you to be happy too, okay? If there’s anything urgent for you to do, I’ll let you know, but until then, have fun with Harriet. Oh, fuck. Don’t cry.”
“I-I-I’m sorry. You’re t-t-too nice.”
Too nice? No, Alaric was just trying to be a decent human being. It pissed him off that his attitude was unusual enough that it made Beth weep with fucking gratitude. That dick she’d been married to should have had her on a damn pedestal for the last decade, but instead, he’d torpedoed her expectations into the depths along with her self-esteem.
Alaric wrapped an arm around her shoulders because that was allowed, right? He was only offering comfort.
“Tomorrow’s a research day for me, so I’ll drop you off at the ranch in the morning. Judd mentioned having a report for you to format in the afternoon, but you don’t need to sit around here all day while I make phone calls. Just keep an eye out for anyone visiting the senator, okay?”
Alaric didn’t expect any further contact, but it might make Beth feel useful.
“Okay.”
“Hey, here’s a movie with horses in it. You want more wine?”
“I’d better not.”
He kissed her hair because as he said, he was an asshole, and then sat dead still when she rested her head on his shoulder. Actions have consequences, idiot.
A white horse pranced across the screen. Wasn’t Beth’s old horse white? Which reminded him, he’d promised to search for the beast, and he hadn’t done a damn thing about finding it. He needed to speak to Naz
