“I hate that you’re doing this alone. We should be there with you.” Here she goes again. I can almost hear the tears in her voice. I love my family, but they seem to think I'm incapable of doing anything by myself. I’m twenty-eight-years-old, and this is the first time I’ll be living alone. I have to bite back my frustration. I know she doesn’t mean to make me feel like I can’t do this by myself, like she doesn’t have any faith in me.
“I've not lived at home for years now, Mom; you should be used to it. You guys are coming to visit soon, right?” I sigh, hoping that reminding her that she’ll see me soon will be enough to get her off the line.
“A month is too long.” She sighs right back. “And you might have moved out of my house a long time ago, but you didn’t do it alone. You and Bailey haven’t been apart more than a few nights since you were born. And it’s so far away. Are you really going to be okay?” she asks, but I know she’s just using my sister as an excuse. It’s my parents who are struggling with me moving to the other side of the country. “California isn’t just a car ride away, Brooke.”
Although, she is right. My twin sister, Bailey, and I have always done everything together. We look the same, but we’re complete opposites in so many ways, but that’s never stopped us from being the best of friends all of our lives.
“I’m fine, Mom. I promise. I’ll get in touch with Chase soon,” I tell her, knowing that having a cousin so close by will take a little of her worries away. I’m pretty sure having family nearby is the only reason she didn’t chain herself to my car to stop me from leaving. “I have to go. They’re delivering my stuff any second, and I haven’t even looked around the place yet.”
“Okay, sweetie. Call me back when you’re settled in. Love you.”
“Love you too, Mom. Tell Dad and the boys the same.” My brothers have both moved out of our parents’ house too, but I know Mom calls them as often as she can.
“Love you too, kid!” I hear my dad yell from somewhere behind my mom. I should have known he wouldn’t be far away from her; he never is. We have a special relationship, and I know it’s killing him not to be here with me.
My mom married Duke when Bailey and I were six-years-old. Our biological dad was still in the picture back then, and we used to see him regularly, but over the years he struggled to put us first. His job and the multitude of marriages he had were more important to him. As time passed, we saw him less and less.
We still have a relationship with him, but it’s sometimes strained and awkward. It was Duke who was there for us when it mattered. He’s the father we needed growing up. My sister and I asked him to adopt us legally when we were nineteen. Have you ever seen a former badass Army Ranger cry? Neither had I until that day.
Thinking of my family causes a pang of homesickness to hit square in my chest. I miss everyone, but I’m not strong enough to go back to Savannah, not when the memories alone bring me so much pain. It’s better for me to stay away.
I don’t have time to wallow because the small amount of furniture I ordered starts to arrive.
The rest of my night is filled with unpacking suitcases and setting up my tiny studio apartment. I drag out the collection of art supplies, ignoring the chaos of things still to be unpacked. I set up a blank canvas, and for the next few hours, I forget everything but the gray swirls my brush creates.
I paint for hours, only stopping to order myself some food from a nearby pizza place. By the time I fall in to bed much later, tiredness quickly wins out, and I’m asleep before I can even think about just how scared I am to be starting this new life all by myself.
CHAPTER TWO
BROOKE
“Tell me, how are you really settling in? And don’t give me the same lines you gave Mom last week,” Bailey says from the screen of my laptop. Today is the first chance we’ve had to catch up more than the odd text here and there. Between my move and her shifts at the hospital, we never seem to be available at the same time. She always dreamed of working on a labor and delivery ward, but for now she’s working the ER, and her shifts are crazy long.
“It’s not a line, Bay. I really am doing okay. I love it here,” I tell her honestly. I hadn’t thought much of the place I was moving to, my focus firmly on the job I was moving for. I initially chose my apartment because of how close it is to work, but I lucked out and picked a suburb with plenty of things to do. I can’t wait for my sister to visit because she’s going to love the shops here even more than I do. “I still can’t believe you moved to the other side of the country. On your own.” Bailey laughs. I don’t take offense to her words. She’s not the only one who finds it amusing. She’s the outgoing, adventurous one; not me. I think everyone is still in shock that she’s settled down at home in Savannah while I’m here in California.
“I miss you, sissy,” I tell her when she finally stops giggling.
“Miss
