“Close. I’m so close,” she whimpers, reaching down to rub between her legs.
“That’s it. Come for me. Fuck, I love you.”
My balls begin to tingle, tightening up to the point of pain, my orgasm so close I have to force myself to hold back. I won’t go until she does.
“Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh my God. Yes. Right there. There. There. There!!” She screams out so loudly I have no doubt Mr. Lawson next door heard her. “I. Love. You!”
Her entire body arches, her chest skyward and her head down, pussy walls contracting around me. Two pumps later, I’m following her over the edge, grunting my feelings into her ear in the forms of harsh breaths.
We don’t stop. We can’t get enough.
Our floodgates have opened and the constant need for one another has grown into a beast of its own.
Not that you’ll hear a complaint from me.
I’ll never get enough of her. Not anymore.
***
The room is still dark when I open my eyes. The muscles in my forearms and upper thighs ache just a little; enough to be a reminder that what happened with Sawyer wasn’t a dream. It was real.
I hadn’t expected being with her in that way to be so all-consuming. Don’t get me wrong, I knew it would be incredible, but as I got to know her as a human, as I began to develop feelings for her, the better I knew how explosive we’d be together.
I can’t see much in the darkened room, as the curtains are pulled, but I can see the darkened form of Sawyer beside me, only she’s not sleeping, she sitting up with her knees pulled up to her chest and her cheek resting on one.
“Are you all right?” I ask, reaching out to touch her arm.
“I didn’t wake you, did I?”
She tries to hide it, but I can hear the slight sniffle before she speaks.
I ignore her question and push myself up to sit next to her. “Are you crying?”
“I’m sorry.” She sniffs again and wipes her cheeks. “Today is a hard day for me.”
“What happened? Did I hurt you?”
She leans over and flips on the bedside lamp then looks back toward me and shakes her head.
“No, Isaac, you didn’t hurt me. You’re amazing. This has nothing to do with you.”
I glance over her shoulder to the small alarm clock on the nightstand and see that it is barely four in the morning.
“What’s the matter?” I reach across to wipe her tears with my thumb. “You can tell me.”
“I don’t want to drag you down with my shit, Isaac. The past two days have been incredible.”
“Talking to me about why you’re crying won’t drag me down, Sawyer. I love you,” I say honestly. “A lot.”
She smiles the smallest smile then leans over to kiss my lips. “I love you too.”
I wrap her up in my arms and settled back into the pillows with her head on my chest.
“Tell me what’s happening in that beautiful mind of yours.”
She doesn’t say anything for a minute, simply opting to trace shapes over my stomach, but when she finally speaks, her hands go still.
“I had a dream about my brother.”
“Fuck,” I say under my breath. “I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t apologize. It was a good dream. They used to make me sad, but I’ve tried really hard to be better. I can’t live my life the way he would want me to if I’m upset all of the time. The way he died was so... traumatic for me. I had a hard time reconciling it in my head and heart, and I don’t even know if I have yet.”
“What happened to him?” I ask, because I want to know what she is thinking in her head. I want to know everything about her so I can help her in whatever way I’m capable of. I don’t expect her to answer me, honestly, but when she does, I let her speak until she’s completely finished. I don’t interrupt. I don’t ask questions.
“I was living in LA. He had just turned seventeen years old, and started making incredibly wrong choices in his life over the course of a year. He kept getting in trouble with the police and we found out he was on drugs, and my parents didn’t know what to do or how to help him. He was pushing back, getting worse. The last straw was when he stole money from my parents for more drugs. He and my father got into a fight. I had to step in and help, so I told him I would let him stay with me as long as he got help. He agreed. I guess I was naïve.”
I can hear the emotion in her voice with each word, but still, I don’t speak, I just rub up and down her spine so she knows I’m here and I’m listening.
“He moved in with me a few months before the wildfires.”
My hands go still.
“The first month was hard, but he seemed to be doing okay. We had a few job interviews lined up for him and he’d been seeing a recovery therapist. I was so proud of him. Then a couple months later, the fires started. They happened so quickly. I mean, you know how fast it happens. It’s what you do for a living. I was watching the news and I thought we were safe. I was just leaving work when I got a call from Jason’s boss, who was a guy I was dating at the time, to tell me Jason hadn’t shown up to work. It didn’t take me long to figure out he had swiped my debit card and took hundreds of dollars from me.”
I can hear the anger and sadness in her voice, and my stomach is in my throat because of the things she must have gone through.
“I knew what he had done before I
