Unfortunately, Teddy wasn’t the first to say that. “I worry about how the baby will affect his mental health. Even though he won’t admit it, sometimes hearing Levi cry takes him back there. I’ve seen his face and he does his best to fight it, but...” Her husband would always struggle with his PTSD and babies were one of his triggers. Seeing children devastated by war had scarred him deeply.
Teddy’s smile was sad as he stared at Levi in her arms. “He loves you. He loves his son.”
“Sometimes love isn’t enough.”
Teddy gave her a squeeze, careful of the baby. “It will be in this case.”
Carly hoped he was right.
“Now, today is supposed to be a happy day, so let’s stop being so morose. Matty will pull through for his family. He always does.” He got on his toes and planted a noisy kiss on Carly’s cheek. When he pulled back, his green eyes went wide. “Oh! I think I hear the marching band. I’ll be right outside, watching for the eldest Bryson buck in his spiffy dress uniform. If you need anything, just hollaaa.”
Then the hairdresser was gone, the jingle of the bell above the door the only thing left in his wake.
Carly looked down into Levi’s face. The baby was awake and quiet, just absorbing the new atmosphere while contently sucking on his fist. “Let me grab your binky, my sweet baby boy.”
She pulled the diaper bag from the stroller and put it on the table sitting in front of the salon’s large picture window that had Manes on Main hand-painted in decorative script across the glass. Even decorated for Christmas with colorful lights and snowflake window clings, she’d get a clear view of the parade.
Hannah saw the movement through the window and waved at her. Carly returned it with a smile.
She would love to have a girl, too. This family needed more girls, but she wouldn’t push Matt into a second adoption. They were both getting older and she was just relieved and happy when he announced last year that he was ready to go ahead with adopting.
And now her dream had come to fruition.
Digging around in the bag, her fingers brushed against a piece of paper, so she grabbed it along with the binky. Once the pacifier was plugged securely between Levi’s little lips and he was sucking quietly, she unfolded the notepaper she had not placed in the bag this morning.
She recognized the scratchy handwriting immediately and her heart stopped. She held her breath as she skimmed the note, then started back at the top to read it more slowly. Once again, tears threatened to spill, making the words difficult to read.
To my love, my life, my wife, the mother of my son,
I could never say in words just how much you mean to me and how much you are a part of me. How much you push me to be a better man. But I want you to know, you do.
I cannot love you any more than I do already.
Thank you for helping me hang on, and for you hanging on along with me through the rough spots.
I’ll love you forever.
Your Marine, your husband, the father of your son.
~ M
“Holy shit,” Carly whispered, wiping away the tears that finally escaped. That note was the best Christmas present she ever received. She was saving and cherishing it forever. She might even sleep with it under her pillow.
The bell jingled again and she quickly swiped at the rest of the tears and blinked away the blurriness, only to see her brave Marine, her beautiful husband and the loving father of her son walk through the door.
He was the love of her life. Faults and all.
Levi wiggled in Carly’s arms and Matt noticed his son’s eyes fastened on him once he got closer. But while he was happy his son was beginning to recognize him, Carly’s tears caught his attention and his spine became a steel rod.
“What’s the matter? Are you alright? Is he alright? What happened?”
Carly sniffled and smiled. “We’re perfect, you asshole. This was supposed to be a happy day and you made me cry.”
He grinned. “Guess you found my note.”
“Matt...”
“I meant every word.”
Carly blew out a breath and wiped at her eyes. “I know.”
“That shouldn’t make you cry.”
“Of course, it should! I know you don’t take saying things like that lightly. That’s what made it worse. Or better. Or... whatever. It was perfect.”
He stared at her red-rimmed blue eyes and her quivering bottom lip that he wanted to taste. So, he did, leaning in to give her a quick kiss.
When Levi made a happy squeak between them, Matt took him from her arms and held him to his chest, turning toward the large window. “Hey, Levi. You won’t remember this parade, but it’s the first of many. Uncle Max will be up front.”
Carly moved to stand next to him and he put his arm around her shoulders, giving her a squeeze.
“I can’t stay long but I wanted to check in on you two.” He turned to her. “Sorry about this morning. I promise I’ll let the doctor know what happened.”
He’d keep that promise, too. He didn’t want to fuck up what he and Carly had. She took on a lot when she took on him. And just like he said in the note, he was grateful as fuck that she hung on through his rough times. Every single one.
She ran her fingers over Levi’s dark downy hair, tears still in her eyes. “Thank you for doing everything you’ve done to work on getting better. For doing everything in your power to make it so we could bring a child into our life.”
Matt hoped that his son’s eyes stayed blue like Autumn’s, so they’d be like his. “I know how much it meant to you. I needed to do it for you.
