“You don’t have to work, Jessie.”
“I love being a restaurant reviewer.” I snagged the knee high boots I’d set out before my shower and sat in the wingback chair to zip them up. “If I thought you’d be around to watch the kids, I’d fly back to New York twice a month and keep my job at the Post.”
Scott shifted his weight, his forehead furrowing. “I’ll be around.”
“You are never around.” I stood, looking down at the outfit. The dress revealed more leg than I remembered, making me wish I’d packed tights. I didn’t want his work friends first impression of me to be MILF. “You’re gone more days than you’re home, and half of your trips are last minute. I can’t count on you to be there for the kids, and unlike you, I’m not disrupting their schedules so I can keep my job.”
“You’re changing the subject.” He still held the damned card.
“No, I’m not. You aren’t treating me like a person. The kids and I are a possession to you, something to put in the moving van and tote across the country. You don’t even value me enough to respect my privacy.”
“What’s this new need for privacy? Do you have something to hide, Jessie?”
“You seem awfully focused on what a stupid business card might mean. You feeling guilty about anything, Scott?”
He blinked, opening his eyes wide. “You have got to be kidding me. I’m not the one hiding business cards.”
“I wasn’t hiding a thing.” I smoothed my hands against the black wool dress I’d thought was sexy a moment ago. Now the plunging neckline seemed too much. It all just seemed a bit too much.
“Then why are you upset that I found it?”
“I’m upset that you threw away the papers I was reading. I’m upset that you went through my things as if you had a right to.”
He crossed the room and dropped the card in the trash can. “You’re avoiding the issue.”
“No, you’re trying to make an issue of a card. A card, Scott. When I have never once questioned you about late night meetings, weekends away from the family, or having someone else answer the phone in your hotel room.” My gaze locked with his, praying he didn’t flinch. I trusted my husband. If I didn’t, there wasn’t any point in being married.
Scott’s expression softened and he nodded. “And I have never asked you for detailed accounts of when you go out.”
I rolled my eyes. “You mean when I go out with your sister? Thanks so much for that leap of faith.”
“She’s not the only one you go out with.”
“Choose your words carefully, because you can’t take them back.” I pressed my lips together, wanting to scream. When I’d confided I didn’t want to move because I would miss my friends, he’d waved it off and said I’d make new ones. I’d tried to explain that friends don’t come from a catalog. It’s not like I was going to go through the fifth grade again, or take Calculus, or even Lamaze. Scott had vetoed having another baby before Kyle was even born. I knew them, they knew me, and not one of them would think of going through my purse and deciding what needed to be tossed aside.
“I just want to know why you kept his card.”
I met his gaze and held it, not knowing what to say. I didn’t know the answer. It was some kind of subconscious safety net, though in reality if things went bad with Scott here in Portland, I would pack up the kids and move back home before I cheated.
“Are you threatening me, Jessie?”
I opened my mouth, wanting to say yes, wanting to know if that would mean he’d fold his hand.
His phone peeled out it’s annoying ring, making me want to jump out of my skin. Scott cursed, digging the phone from his pocket. He keyed in some kind of response.
“We’re late. The Nelson’s are downstairs waiting for us.”
“Oh, goody,” I deadpanned. I took a deep breath, wanting so desperately not to keep getting sucked back to this place where we were at war. But it seemed as if to do that I had to have a lobotomy.
He turned on his heel and stomped to the door of the hotel room, expecting me to follow like an obedient puppy. He wasn’t giving up a thing to move here, and it felt as if he was plucking the parts of my life from me one by one. He was picking up his life and transplanting it. Mine had been thrown in a tornado; the only thing salvageable was the kids.
At the door, Scott turned around. “Aren’t you coming?”
If I’d had anywhere else to go, I wouldn’t have. But that was the rub. If we moved here, I’d have to be completely dependent on a man who refused to see why it was so hard to be just that. I’d never had to be completely reliant on him before. I had my network, family and friends who filled in whenever he was out of town or out of touch with how I felt. Here, if he failed me there was no safety net.
My feet moved, but my heart lagged behind.
Chapter 5
D im red and orange lights set the restaurant aglow, warming the atmosphere with friendliness. It was a spectacular effect, and it made me wish I were reviewing the restaurant, not trying to squeeze myself into a life I wasn’t sure would fit.
Kit and Mark Nelson were much better than I’d feared, a little older than us with four kids. I knew I’d like Kit the instant I saw her purse – just like mine but in a gorgeous crimson. You can tell a lot about a woman from her handbag.
At the
